Fall Housecleaning

I'm still doggedly trying to clean out my basement of years and years of clutter. The problem lies with my craft supplies and my flea market stock. It's darned near impossible for me to discard any of this stuff but I have to make room for my "handyman" to tear down a wall and lay out new flooring. He's going to hate me when he sees how much he'll have to work around! Oh well, he's an old family friend and very much like a son to me so he'll figure something out.

I love this picture of the Coleus I planted this year. I've never seen another plant that is so varied in color that flowers are not needed. I only planted two tubs which sit at the entrance to my backyard and the color is spectacular. They continue to become fuller and prettier as the season goes on and it will break my heart to pull them up in October.

Another gorgeous leafy plant is the Sweet Potato Vine. The limey green leaves are outstanding and I like to place a few impatiens in the pot with it to give a contrasting burst of color. My garden is very colorful but I'm careful to plant things that need minimum maintenance. I rely heavily on Impatiens because there are so many color choices and they fill out beautifully.

My front garden is full of various perennials that flower from Spring to Fall. I decided this year that, because it gets full sun all afternoon, I'd plant Portulaca among the perennials instead of Impatiens and it's been quite successful. Portulaca seems to thrive on full, hot sun and even drought doesn't bother it. Again, there are many color choices.

I love it when people compliment me on my pretty garden but I'm sure they think I put more effort into it than I actually do. The praise never goes to my head, though, because I remember when we first bought the house in 1968 and I spent many hours transplanting weeds!

Senior Turd Toss

I don't know if the "turd toss" is unique to the senior park I spend my winters at or if it's been used elsewhere. The first time I heard of such a thing, I just thought it was hilarious. I spend 6 months a year at a senior park in Florida where I have more fun than anywhere else on earth. In mid March we congregate on "Easy Street" and sign up for the great Turd Toss contest where the Turd King and the Turd Queen for the coming year will be decided by a toss of the "turd".

We have a new, unused potty sitting regally in the middle of the road...lid open. As each contestant steps up to the line (about 20 feet from the potty), they are handed a damp pantyhose wrapped bundle of cooked speghetti which they have to toss into the potty. On either side of the street are rows of interested spectators cheering on their favorite contestant...to be honest, we cheer them all on!

"Turds" fly through the air landing in, on, or far away from the potty, depending on the tossing skill of the contestant. When someone is lucky enough to land a turd directly into the potty we are ecstatic...there will be a new king or queen this year! Sometimes we have to have a "turd toss off" because of a tie and we end up congratulating the winner and consoling the loser.

At the end of the contest, the winners are draped in regal purple velvet robes and crowns and declared the new Turd King and Turd Queen for the next year. Their duties will be to lead the park parades and appear at park functions wearing their royal attire. We take this quite seriously and treat our royal couple with much respect...and more than a few giggles.

P.S. I just learned how to attach a photo to my blog. One more success story for this computer novice!!

Birthday

I had my 66th birthday last week and one of my favorite presents was on a card from my sister-in-law. It was a button that said "I've Survived Damn Near Everything". And I have! I've found that in life you either survive circumstances or cave in. You can get through many problems by standing perfectly still and gathering your thoughts. In serenity comes clear answers or at least rational ones. You make too many mistakes by acting or reacting impulsively.

For instance....I bought a new fridge from Sears in May. It was defective so they replaced it within a week. Good service, right? Well, the new fridge had a seal so strong that the whole thing pulled away from the wall every time I tried to open it! I phoned and visited the large appliance department a few times asking what I should do. I was told to lower the temperature in the fridge; blame my ceramic tile floors; I had no guarantee with Sears; I had a 3 month guarantee with Sears; I had a 12 month guarantee with Sears. Finally, I decided to return the fridge for a different one costing more. No deal! The department manager refused because I'd already returned one (defective). So I phoned the store manager and made a strong but polite request for fair treatment. My new fridge will arrive this Thursday!

The moral of this story is to stick to your guns but do it politely. Also, go to top management when necessary.

Collingwood Elvis Festival

Four friends and I went to the Collingwood Elvis Festival this past weekend. For anyone who has never seen Elvis impersonators, it is all done in fun without making fun of Elvis himself. The impersonators come in all shapes, sizes, sexes, and ages. No-one actually looks like Elvis but they dress like he did, comb their hair (somewhat) like he did, and sing his wonderful songs with gusto. The main streets of Collingwood were filled with people sharing the same interests and enjoying them with no embarrassment. Many come dressed as Elvis and mix in with the crowds....people smile fondly as they pass by. "Blue Suede Shoes", "Suspicious Minds", "Heartbreak Hotel", and oh, so many more, played and sung everywhere we went. It's magical in a way, how almost 30 years after Elvis died he's still revered and celebrated.

We bought Elvis bracelets, wore Elvis earrings and t-shirts. We sat for hours and watched one performer after another sing the songs of a man who provided us with some of our favorite moments. We sang along until our voices gave out. We stayed up till the wee hours of the morning in our hotel room...laughing, drinking, dancing to Elvis music. At the end of 3 days filled with Elvis, we 5 Grandmothers hugged each other goodbye and promised we'd do it all over again next year!

Life's Pleasures

Life is full of simple pleasures. I started thinking about it this morning after reading my sister-in-law's blog about her passion for roses. Gardening provides so many of us with an overflowing amount of pleasure but there are other things, too. Like soft, summer breezes on our face. Like the sweet sound of a child's giggle. Like the smell of the Christmas turkey merrily roasting in the oven. Like the taste of an ice-cream cone dripping down our hands in the heat of the day. I know there is evil in the world but there is also much beauty. I love to watch my grandchildren's animated faces as they tell me about their lives. I love to watch a little sprig of plant develop roots in a glass of water. Shared laughter with someone I like is pure pleasure. Waking in the morning and seeing my newly painted bedroom when my eyes first open makes me happy. Breaking even at the casino makes me feel like a winner!

I read once that happy people choose to be happy. I suffered from depression from my 20's to my 50's and my memories of that period of time is that I fed on the misery, allowing it to envelope me. Counseling saved my life and taught me that I truly did have choices. I choose to be happy and I am!

DRUGHOUSE IN THE NEIGHBORHOOD

I live in a nice neighborhood, not an upscale one but a very nice working class area. A couple of years ago a young drug dealer rented one of the houses on my street....all the others are occupant owned. Since then we've been dragged from our sleep by his customers leaving the house between 1 A.M. and 5 A.M. and yelling filth. Teenagers from the local high school even frequent this house at lunch time. Since this young man is known to the police and the partying goes on most nights of the week, I can't understand why this has gone on so long without police surveilance putting a stop to it. The young man is related to one of the well known drug lords in the city so neighbors are rightly worried about reporting him or complaining about the noise. Last night, at 4 A.M., I was fed up and phoned police to stop the noise but, of course, by the time police arrived all was quiet. Now I wonder if I've put myself in danger by complaining.

One thing I've learned in my life is that law abiding, tax paying people are not as quickly protected by law enforcement as we'd like to think. Criminals know all the loop holes and weak points in the law. They use our tax dollars for lawyers to defend them even when they've been caught in the act. Many jails have been turned into spas because of "human rights" activists. I can only hope my local drug dealer will move away one day and then my nice little neighborhood will return to normal. This is a selfish thought, I know, but its the only reasonable outcome I can expect.

Life After Death

My friend passing away today has made me realize how important it is to write about what happened after my husband passed away last year.

My husband had been sick for a year with esophagus cancer and we'd (my daughters and I) cared for him at home until he passed away. Immediately after his passing there was a feeling of relief that he was finally free from his pain and misery. My eldest grandson came into the house about 15 minutes after his beloved Grampa died so we left him alone with him to say his goodbyes. I began to worry about my grandson because he had only just turned 21 and it must have been a horrible experience for him to lose his Grampa so I returned to the room to make sure he wasn't too upset.

I stood at the end of the bed with my attention riveted on my grandson when, out of the corner of my eye, I saw a burst of energy (?) erupt from my husband. I can only describe it as a density of air that had obvious soft, cloud-like edges but which immediately filled the room almost from wall to wall and floor to ceiling. In the same instant I sensed a tremendous feeling of joy, as though he'd finally escaped his poor, failed body. My youngest daughter walked into the room at that moment but we didn't speak. Later, as we sat and talked and waited for the coroner, my daughter said she'd seen a strange sight when she walked into the room. She'd seen something in the air that filled the room from wall to wall and floor to ceiling and it also spread behind me into the adjoining livingroom (I hadn't seen that because it was behind me). I knew I hadn't imagined what I'd seen but it still shocked me that she'd seen it, too. I believe my husband finally gave up his year long fight and what I saw was his spirit springing free. Its interesting that my daughter and I saw this but my grandson, who had been lost in his own thoughts and prayers, saw nothing.

I'm not religious and have no church affiliation but I do believe in life after death. I don't know what form it will take but my experience with my husband gives me hope that the hereafter will be a good place.

I've told this story many times over the past year and I'm sure most people think I imagined it all but I know what I saw. I wasn't waiting for it to happen or even expecting it--it came as a surprise when I was watching and worrying over my grandson--and then my daughter saw it, too. The experience hasn't driven me to join a church or embrace religion but it has made me feel more secure in the thought that my husband is happy and in a better place.

I wonder if he's found a nice little sailboat and a pretty little lake to sail it in???

A Passing

My dear friend passed away today. She'd found out only 2 weeks ago that she had pancreatic cancer and she had to make her peace with the world and say her goodbyes in that short time. At my age I'll probably lose many more friends, some lifelong, before I say my last goodbyes. Each loss will make me feel as though my life is disintegrating. Death is so damn permanent!

I'm feeling very melancholy today and want to pass on a small word of wisdom. Money doesn't matter. Possessions don't matter. Position doesn't matter. Treasure your family and real friends because that is the only thing that matters in the end.

Making Time

I'm a rabid yard saler and Ebay seller...at least I was until Canada Post raised their rates so high I was embarrassed to tell my customers how much their postage would be. Now I'm limiting myself...no yard saleing until I clear out my stock through my flea market table. This has cleared my weekends so beautifully that I now have the time to meet my sister for coffee on Sundays the way we used to do.

Sometimes we get caught up in work or hobbies and forget that the important things in life are our relationships with family and friends. A simple thing like not having the time to have coffee with my sister on Sunday doesn't seem too important until we realize how short life can be. A few years ago my sister and I weren't speaking for a few months...we both have wicked tempers...and I found a message on my answering machine from her husband saying she was in the hospital. On that long ride to the hospital I kept thinking how no disagreement or tiny hurt feelings were important if they kept really loving sisters apart. It terrified me to think we might never have the chance to be friends again. As it turned out, she had her appendix removed and was as thrilled to see me as I was to see her. It taught me a lesson, though...don't take tomorrow for granted.

Today I'm meeting my sister for coffee and we'll yak and laugh and just enjoy the moment.

Gardening...one of life's greatest pleasures!

I just discovered that I can type my blogs in the color of my choice....probably sounds lame to people who understand computers better than I do but every little new thing I find to do on the computer is a thrill to me!

I've been happily busy preparing my flower gardens, planting, watering, and spreading mulch. This is one of life's simple pleasures that I'll enjoy for as long as I can dig in the dirt. Being retired means that we can putter around in our yards or planters whenever we feel the urge to create beauty in the world....wearing ratty looking clothes and ruining what's left of our fingernails. We know what true beauty is. After fiddling around in the garden for hours, I snuggle into the lawn chair with my feet up, a gin and tonic in my hand, and a smile on my face. Life is good!

One More Day in the Life

I've been awfully sore since I returned from Florida this spring....the reason being I've had to do all the heavy labor that my husband used to do. He passed away last summer after spending 12 months battling cancer (and "battling" is an understatement). I often wonder if he'd be proud of what I've been able to accomplish since he passed away or if he'd be resentful of my successes without him.

There have been times I've had to decide if what I need in the basement or upstairs is worth another trip. I've carted boxloads of things all over the house, and into and out of the car. I've dug so many weeds out of the vegetable garden and flower gardens that I considered it might actually be better to cultivate them. Not much was done around here last year because we home cared my husband throughout his illness so I'm learning that nature takes over in more ways than one if left to follow its own course.

But hard work usually brings contentment at the end and then its time to reap the rewards. This summer I'll be able to sit out in the yard and watch the flowers grow and the vegetables ripen. I'll never forget that it was Dennis' hard labor that originally created my little oasis but I'll also have a better appreciation of my own abilities to carry on.

Touring a Funeral Home

My sister-in-law e-mailed me today to say that she and her husband toured a funeral home which had just opened. Now, there's nothing wrong with doing that if you might be needing such services in the near future but for two healthy, busy people to find a funeral home open house interesting....well, I just think they need a new hobby!

My husband passed away last summer and I was forced to meet with a funeral home representative to make arrangements. For those who might not know, things are done differently now. The representative was wonderful to deal with...very dignified, capable, and kind. We (my three daughters and I) chose a package that covered all the details we preferred not to dwell on but had to be considered. This "package" made the process easier for all of us.

During the funeral, the room was filled with loving and caring family and friends who were there to support us in our time of loss and to show their respect for my husband. Again, this funeral was a little different. Two of our grandsons stood before us and spoke about what their grandfather had meant in their lives...including many very funny stories. My granddaughter played her Grampa's guitar and sang, along with two more granddaughters, two more grandsons and the girlfriend of one of them. Their chosen song was "I Hope You Had the Time of Your Life". We all laughed, cried, and hoped he had, too.

NATIVE UPRISING IN CALEDONIA

I've lived in Canada all my life--within 15 miles of Caledonia, Ontario. And all of my life there have been rumblings among the natives about how their ancestors were cheated out of their land over a hundred years ago.

My great grandfather owned a business less than a hundred years ago and, when he fell on hard times, he was forced to sell out. Does that give me a right to build tire fires outside the business now and demand it be given back to me?

Most of us have strong sympathy for the native culture because we "white" people almost destroyed it--but that was a century or two ago. Its time the natives who are complaining start building their own lives instead of depending on government handouts. When we see them in fatigues and face scarves and calling themselves "warriors", we know they're really a gentle people who have lost the integrity of their ancestors. When we see natives from other provinces and even other countries joining the barricade, we wonder how many natives have employment they can walk away from so easily. We also wonder why the police didn't step in the first day and put a stop to it--arresting the lawless demonstrators who chose to defile our air with the toxic fumes of burning tires and close a main highway through the town.

These natives are arrogant to think they are more important in the scheme of things than their white/black/brown neighbor. They show a great deal of disrespect for others when they care so little about the inconvenience and financial hardships caused by their actions.

Do I think we'll see a resolution to the Caledonia standoff in the near future? No--because the Canadian government is weak and unable to make a conclusive decision in this mess.

New to Blogging

This is a brand new life experience for me. Being a computer novice, so to speak, I just discovered "blogging" a few months ago. I'm 65 years of age and absolutely full of aspirations to learn and do so many new things--there isn't enough time in my day. I thought maybe I could use this format to instill a little hope in the younger generation that getting old can be a positive thing.

Yesterday I spoke to a long time family friend who feels he's just "found himself". After working hard for 30 years, he's finally discovered that the perfect employment for him is to create masterpieces in glass--window panes, to be exact. I couldn't help but feel pride and respect for this sweet man as he described how long it had taken for him to find the job that made him the happiest. Most of us struggle our whole lives chasing the almighty dollar in jobs we hate and forget that the moments we're living are the only moments we're allowed. The moral of this little message is...be happy!