Incongruity

I'm a "people watcher", the kind who loves to sit at an airport and watch the interesting people shuffle by.  Today I went to an Arbys for lunch and, as I approached the front door, I saw a battered old bicycle leaning against the wall with an abominably filthy pillow, blanket, and bags of clothing tied all around it.  My first thought was that it belonged to a street person who was dining at Arbys and did I want to dine in the same room with him.

I entered the restaurant, enticed by the promise of their delicious roast beef sandwich, and looked around the room.  I saw two clean cut couples at separate tables and then a lone but fat man sitting in a corner leafing through what looked like a thousand coupons.  Now, my mind stuttered a little as I tried to envision a fat street person who rode a bike and decided, no, he must be in the washroom.

I ordered my meal and walked near the lone man to get my soda and caught a whiff of terrible as I got close to him.  I didn't want to stare but my curiosity made me take note of a very filthy man in his 50's sorting through tons of coupons, some of which hung out of his t-shirt pocket.  He had two little cups of something in front of him which I assumed he'd bought there.

As I ate my sandwich and fries, feeling guilty for being able to afford them,  he began to talk and giggle a bit.  Poor man, I thought, he's so ill...then I snuck a peek to see if he was really talking to a person and saw that he was talking into a cell phone.  Street people don't use cell phones, do they? 

This continued until I finished eating and left the restaurant, still wondering what his story was.  People are so interesting!

Last Coffee Friday of the Season

Today we had the last Friday coffee morning of the season and that meant husbands were invited.  Four dared to enter our female sanctuary and I think they all enjoyed themselves.  We also had Bailey's to add to the coffee and that might have been the reason we ran out of coffee so soon but it also could be because a large lot of park friends joined us.  Next year I'll bring over one of the 100 cup urns from the clubhouse for our last get-together.

I sat and looked at the group around me and loved them all.  They are some of the nicest people in the whole darned world and they've made my senior life a full and happy one just with their presence.  It's so sad to hear them talk of leaving in the next few days or few weeks to head home just as I will but we always have high hopes for next winter when all or most of us will gather here again.

I am truly blessed to be part of this wonderful group.

Snowbirds

Now that it's the end of March, snowbirds are preparing to return to their northern homes and the air is filled with the wails of the males of the species, "It's never going to fit in the car!".

The females simply smile and reply, "I'm sure you'll be able to fit it all in.".

Silly men, they never seem to understand that there's always room for one more little item that just has to make it back up north.

As the snowbirds climb into their seriously overpacked car, a final irritating grumble erupts from Mr. Snowbird, "Now I can't see out of the damn rear window!".

Mrs. Snowird just sits in silence, happy that all her little treasures are along for the long drive home.

Same Sex Union

I don't think I'll ever accept the concept of a same sex "marriage" even though I do accept a legal union of same sex couples that would protect them much the same way as a marriage would.  Forever, in my eyes, a marriage will always consist of a man and a woman but I know that some same sex couples remain together longer than some heterosexual couples.  The whole idea causes a conflict of feelings in my mind but that may be because of my lifelong conditioning.

What I really don't understand is why same sex couples, who desperately want to be accepted without prejudice, insist on demanding to be treated exactly the same as heterosexual couples.  I truly believe the majority of the people have a great deal of trouble with this.  We, me included, want to be fair so we try to recondition ourselves to believe that gay is normal.  I tried but I can't do it.  I still believe that being gay is abnormal and those people should not be prejudiced against but there have to be certain areas that they should not enter...such as "marriage".

Civil rights belong to us all and I claim my civil right to feel that marriage is for a man and a woman.  Gay couples can still receive the same legal protection if they call their union something else. 

Words of Wisdom

Recently I wrote a few blogs with words of exquisite wisdom and, when I hit the "publish" button, they disappeared into unknown computer space never to be seen again.  I wonder where this blog will sail off to?

Note:  Apparently silliness doesn't disappear because this one was actually published and saved.  Oh, the wonders of computerland!

Present From Jan

One of the things I'm most proud of is how popular my Friday morning coffee gathering has become.  I counted 20 ladies here a couple of weeks ago but thank heavens we get fewer than that when we're forced by weather to have it inside my little trailer.  Still, some of the ladies have to sit and drink their coffee awfully close to the bathroom but no-one ever complains and they return again.

Jan brought me a wonderful gift on Friday...a plaque that says, "Girlfriends Gather Here", and I love it because it's so true.  She said her husband, Gary, saw it and told her to get it because that's what we all are...girlfriends.

In my younger years I wasn't sociable enough to have many girlfriends but now that I'm a senior there's nothing to stop me.  I gather as many as I can and enjoy the company of every one.  There are so many wonderfully kind and fun ladies here in the park that it's a blessing to all of us to have each other as friends.  We make each other laugh, cry on each other's shoulders, and remove any loneliness that might exist.  I feel so very fortunate to be here.

We're Winners

Sylvia and I, who rarely go to the clubhouse for coffee on Saturday mornings, wanted to to see who would win the Queen of Hearts draw because only 2 cards were remaining.  We bought 10 tickets between us to share because we might as well try ourselves if we were going to be there and darned if we didn't win the 50/50...we split the $180!!!  Next was the draw for the Q of H and our friend Audrey went up to choose between the 2 cards that are left but she chose the wrong one, darn it.  Sylvia and I have to sell the 50/50 tickets next Saturday morning so we have to go back again but it will be fun to see whose ticket is drawn for the Q of H because that will be a definite winner.

I think I won the 50/50 on Saturday coffee about 10 years ago and had about given up hope of ever winning it again...of course, one has to attend the Saturday coffee time to do it.

On a sad note, Florida is trying once again to close down our internet casinos and has closed at least one that is on our list.  I don't know why they insist on taking these away from us when large casinos exist with no problem at all.  Also, why not close the bars that are so instrumental in ruining people's lives instead of our little casinos? 

We have a large group from our park who will be heading up to the internet casinos tomorrow so I hope they remain open.  The one we refer to as #4 will serve us all a pizza lunch, too.  I know gambling is a vice but so are a lot of other things that can be just as damaging if not kept in check.  We are adults who have the right to spend our money as we choose and I'd rather drop it in a slot machine than lay it on a counter in exchange for whiskey.

Just think how many awful establishments exist that are completely legal and not continually harrassed by the government to close.  I really have to wonder why they are picking on our little internet casinos...could it be the large casinos are pressuring them?

Anyway, Sylvia will spend her 50/50 winnings on something sensible and I will no doubt take mine to the internet casino.  To each his own!

My Blossom

This is Blossom, one of Ty's Beanie Boos, a very nice present from Shirley who wanted to thank me for taking her to the internet casinos every week.  I hate having people buy me presents to thank me for something but I did try to be gracious about it.  I really do love Blossom and have her sitting right next to the computer so I can see her when I'm working.  She makes me smile.

Love and Pain

I watched a program on T.V. today about a young girl lost in the depths of unrequited love.  I remember feeling that kind of pain and thinking it would actually kill me because no-one could suffer such anguish and live through it, could they?  The agony was with me every waking moment and took the color out of everything around me.  That I survived from moment to moment amazed me because I honestly didn't believe I could stand one more moment feeling that way.  But I did.  And, with each passing day, the pain lessened and the world around me took on color and promise again.  My life went on and today I am a happy, satisfied, and contented old lady who remembers when...and who knows the bad times can be overcome and discarded given time.

More Slush/Card Party People

These are some of the people who make my winter in Florida as pleasurable as it is.  We usually play "65" every Tuesday, Thursday, and Saturday evenings with at least most of these ladies.  Sometimes other activities take precedence but we always come back.

Slush/Card Party People

Some pictures of our slush/card party last week.

The Great Turd Toss of 2013

No pictures because my camera isn't working right!!!

Today was the great turd toss of 2013 and we had record crowds to witness it.  Mark, resplendent in his own turd hat, was our master of ceremonies and needed a microphone to amplify his voice enough to reach the masses of people lining the street.  Most were in lawn chairs but many enjoyed the comfort of their golf carts.  The weather was perfect, sunny and warm with a lovely breeze.

I did laundry this morning and noticed that people were already staking out their spots for the turd toss and positioning their lawn chairs in the most advantageous spots, midway between the toilets so they could best see who dunked the turd.  I called Sylvia so she came over with her chair and I took 3 of my folding chairs up to Easy St. for me, Gail, and Red.  It's a good thing we did because when the turd toss started at 3 P.M. we wouldn't have been able to find a spot to place them.

Jan helped Mark by keeping a list of the 52 participants who eagerly awaited their turn with the turds.  Every other year the turds have been made with nylon stockings stuffed with wet speghetti but this year the turds were made with what looked like brown flannel fabric stuffed with popcorn...much cleaner and not sickeningly sticky like the old ones.

I knew this was my year to win.  I just knew it.  But...I missed the damn toilet on both of my tries.

8 of the men and 7 of the women did dunk one turd and were allowed to enter the turd toss off where the winners, Wilf and Jan, were declared our 2013 King and Queen of the Turds because they were the only ones to dunk a turd in the toss off.

I watched in deep sadness as the Queen Turd hat was placed on Jan's head instead of mine.  Jan kindly let me wear her hat for a moment but it just wasn't the same as actually winning it.  Next year will be my year, I just know it!!

Jo's Toes

This is a picture of Jo's latest pedicure.  I'm not crazy about the green polish but the shamrock is cute.  She got it to celebrate St. Patrick's day this month.

Sylvia and I already had our pedicures for the month but plan to have some kind of flower put on our big toes when we get the next one.  It's just one more way to put a little sunshine and a giggle in our lives.  I'm thinking I want a chrysanthemum (hope I spelled that right).  I'm thinking dark rose toes with a white and yellow flower.  

The White Picket Fence

It might sound as though I've been a person with very low expectations a lot of the time but, as a young girl, I had a quite short list of things I really wanted when I grew up and got married.  First on the list was a home I owned.  This makes a lot of sense because I grew up in some pretty terrible places and all of them were rented (except my great grandmother's house where I lived for my first couple of years).

Second on my list was a washer and dryer.  I have no idea why they loomed so large and important in my dreams but it might have been from years of seeing my mother and grandmother do the family wash by hand in the kitchen sink.

Third, and just as important in my yearnings, was a white picket fence.  I think this somehow represented permanence in my mind.  

Well, my Dennis bought us a house and, in due time, a washer and dryer.  I'd almost forgotten about that white picket fence but apparently Dennis didn't forget.  The original fence and gate to our backyard was just an old rusty wire one so one day Dennis decided it was time to yank it out and build a nice new wooden one.  Dennis was a jack of all trades and could do just about anything he put his mind to so building a chest high wooden fence was easy for him.  When it was done he painted it a sparkling white enamel and, as my dream memory surfaced, he said, "well, I've given you one more thing on your list.".

That pretty little fence has been gone for a long time now, not surprising because I still live in the house we bought in 1968.  Dennis built the new fence, too, but it received a red cedar stain to match the deck he built.

I don't know what brought the memory of my white picket fence to light today.  Joann and I were yakking and something was said that brought the memory back to me.

It was a good memory....thank you, Dennis.

Jody Arias...Yuk!

I have to admit I'm kind of addicted to the Jody Arias trial and when I analyze why, it's because she's so creepy and conniving that I'm hoping to see the moment when her guilt is proved beyond a doubt by anyone watching.

Here is a pretty, intelligent, and dynamically sexual woman who seems only to be able to keep a man interested in the bedroom.  I'm guessing the reason is that she's so promiscuous and aggressive when it comes to sex that the men don't respect her.  Of course they're using her but she's such a willing participant that you can't really fault the men.

She lies.  It's very difficult for the prosecutor to get a clear yes or no answer from her.  She smirks and acts cocky most of the time.  She's very unlikable.

I'm glad I'm not on the jury because I just might convict her based on her personality.  But then, I think she's guilty as hell of murdering her ex-boyfriend out of jealousy, too.

What Do We Expect

As I change channels on the T.V. it seems like every second screen that pops up shows someone in military stance pointing a gun straight at me.  Video games that are filled with guns and killing take up much of our teenager's day.  Killing is so romanticized that some of our mass murderers even dress alike in long flowing coats.  It's as though they're playing a game that might not be real in their minds.

In my youth, children played with toy guns and pretended to be either the good guy or the bad guy.  They shot at each other and  usually one or the other would fall down in an embarrassingly exaggerated death.  It was all in fun...or was it?  Have we always brainwashed our children to believe that firing a gun at another human being is okay?

I'm not saying that we don't brainwash our daughters but in a different way.  How many of us mothers have automatically given our little girls dolls and play kitchens?  I've noticed with the little boys in my family that they probably enjoyed playing with the girl's toys more than the girls did...and my girls loved playing with toy cars.  

I watched in horror a T.V. program where the parents of a little boy painted his bedroom pink and encouraged his propensity of wearing pink clothing.  I know I was wrong to be horrified but all I could think of is that other little boys would make fun of him.  And I also wondered if his original love of pink was his idea or his parents.  I honestly hope the future generations of children won't have hangups such as needing to wear traditional colors for their clothing but I'm hopelessly imprinted already.

I'm equally horrified when I see a little girl dressed like a grown woman.  Whose fantasy is being promoted here?  Unfortunately, a scantily dressed young girl is ogled by more old men than by boys her own age and that creeps me out.  

There's a good chance that the way we condition our children by games or clothing or movies is pretty much how those children will act out as they grow up.  We will reap what we sow.   



   

Hawaii...maybe not.

No, it's not Hawaii, just the parking lot of the clubhouse on Luau night.  We had a really terrific dinner, thanks to the many volunteers who work together to put it on every year.  There was dancing afterward but I went over to the little clubhouse/library to play cards with Sylvia, Gail, and Kathy.  It makes me a little uncomfortable to be at a dance unescorted because the husbands there feel obligated to dance with the widow ladies and it's not much fun.

One of the places I really would like to see is the real Hawaii but it won't break my heart if that never happens.

Barb Back To Nova Scotia

It was so sad to say goodbye to Barb today.  Right now she's way up in the sky flying back to her home in Nova Scotia but it's the best thing for her to do.  My hope is that her family take her directly to the hospital for evaluation because she's begun to weaken and sicken even more these last few days she's been out of the hospital.  This woman is one of the dearest, sweetest souls I've ever met and it hurts to think I'll probably never see her again.  I'm hoping for a miracle to allow her to get better and be able to come back to Florida next winter but I have serious doubts that will happen.

Canadians, especially, know there will come a day when health or expense will put an end to our wintering in Florida and that's one of the biggest reasons we enjoy what time we have here.  This was probably Barb's farewell to us but none of us are too far behind her.  Our farewells are some time in the future, maybe even the near future.

But life does go on here even after some of our loved ones leave for good and tonight is the Luau in the clubhouse.  We'll eat a nice meal and have a good time.  We'll speak of Barb and how much we'll miss her.  But life does go on...for a while.

My Vow

Sylvia and I spent 7 1/2 hours today trying to convince little Barb to remain in the hospital just one more day to help bring some crucial levels back up but she adamantly refused.  Her daughter, son, daughter-in-law, and the nurses and her doctor tried in vain to make her change her mind but she would listen to no-one.  Apparently a person can't be forced to stay in the hospital even if it's for their own good so they had to let her leave, but against the advice of her doctor.  What this means to us aliens using out-of-country health insurance is that she'll have no coverage should she have to be readmitted with the same ailment again.  She is still unwell and unable to eat or drink very much at all so her health can only deteriorate now.  This drives me crazy.

What she is doing to her family and her friends by putting herself in danger like this is terrible but this sweet lady who is otherwise a soft and gentle person has turned into a stubborn, unclear thinking person who doesn't seem to comprehend the consequences of her actions.

I vow never to do this to my family but I doubt that Barb, in her right mind, would worry hers like this.  Her family, snowed in for the next few days in Nova Scotia, will be worried sick until they can get a flight to Florida to take her home.  Her friends here in the park will be worried sick until her son and daughter-in-law arrive.  We'll all be hoping that she stays relatively healthy until they can get her back home but there's no guarantee she'll allow them to admit her to a hospital even at home if she needs it.

I can't see a happy ending here.

Patience and Kindness

I get  a lot of my inspiration for a blog by reading Facebook and today someone posted a photo and story about an elderly couple coping lovingly with the wife's illness.  This reminded me how often I see instances of loving and caring devotion right here in my senior park.  It is pretty well a daily occurrence so I'd almost come to take it for granted instead of the beautiful thing it really is.

There are many couples here with one mate who needs extra help because of illness or frailty and it touches the heart to watch how well their wife or husband takes such wonderful care of them.  You have to remember that all seniors develop certain struggles of their own as they age so it's endearing to watch one senior looking after another.  

And then there are quite a few widows (widowers get grabbed up quickly) here who know they can count on many, many friends to come to their aid whenever needed.  No-one ever has to feel alone or helpless while they're here in this park and that's one of the reasons I stay.  For the most part, I see people here every day who make me want to be a better person.  We're blessed.