My 16 year old granddaughter wrote a blog about her feelings on the Virginia Tech murders and she said something that touched me deeply. She said that, in the end, no matter the murderer's mental state, he was the one responsible for his actions. He was the one ultimately responsible for making the choice to take the lives of so many innocent people.
There were also many people on the periphery who share in the responsibility in some form. His parents should have been aware that he should be under care, either their's or some psychiatric facility.
The school authorities knew he was a danger to himself and others but did precious little to protect the other students...they didn't even notify them that a dangerous gunman was on the loose at the school until 2 hours after the first killing.
Whoever sold him the gun and ammunition, even legally, participated in the slaughter. The United States government which refuses to practice a strict form of gun control is also mightily responsible.
His tormentors prodded a sick human being, making him even more unstable. They also carry the burden of responsiblity. "Bullying" occurs at all ages and causes untold misery, sometimes death.
But when all the dust settles, Cho made the choice to murder. For whatever reason, he decided that by killing innocent people, he would relieve the hell he was in. He acted in a cruel, cowardly way and that's how he'll be remembered.
Thursday, April 19, 2007
Wednesday, April 18, 2007
Raising Babies
I just read my daughter's blog and she's sadly reminiscing about how many mistakes she made raising her two sons. She's thankful they still love her.
I gave birth to my first daughter when I was still 17 years old. Poor baby (and I'm referring to both of us). Kim weighed 9 lbs. 8 oz. (ouch) and came home with a teenage mother who had read somewhere you should feed a baby every 4 hours. Mothers of today who feed on demand will wince at that but how was I to know differently? I never thought to ask my own mother or grandmother so they thought I knew what I was doing. Poor baby (yeh, both of us).
I was 19 when baby girl number two came along. I was a little better prepared for Cindy because I'd had Kim to practice on for 18 months. The problem was that I needed a D&C for 3 months after she was born but didn't know it. In those days we didn't have a government health insurance plan so I couldn't afford to see a doctor about my weakness and fainting spells. Both Kim and Cindy were seldom held by me for those months because I was too weak to lift them. Today I understand that we missed out on some very important bonding.
Dennis and I behaved ourselves and Shelley wasn't born til 4 1/2 years later. I was 23 1/2 and Dennis was almost 27 so we were at the top of our game as far as raising babies by that time. Either Shelley was a perfect baby or we had learned how to appreciate the little life we'd created. Either way, she was the easiest of all to raise.
As in every life and marriage, circumstances control the outcome no matter how good your intentions are. We made mistakes but we did the best we could. Neither one of us had very good role models to show us the way so we had to improvise. Our girls grew into wonderful women who never failed to make us proud of them. Secretly, we were never sure how they managed to survive our parenting.
I gave birth to my first daughter when I was still 17 years old. Poor baby (and I'm referring to both of us). Kim weighed 9 lbs. 8 oz. (ouch) and came home with a teenage mother who had read somewhere you should feed a baby every 4 hours. Mothers of today who feed on demand will wince at that but how was I to know differently? I never thought to ask my own mother or grandmother so they thought I knew what I was doing. Poor baby (yeh, both of us).
I was 19 when baby girl number two came along. I was a little better prepared for Cindy because I'd had Kim to practice on for 18 months. The problem was that I needed a D&C for 3 months after she was born but didn't know it. In those days we didn't have a government health insurance plan so I couldn't afford to see a doctor about my weakness and fainting spells. Both Kim and Cindy were seldom held by me for those months because I was too weak to lift them. Today I understand that we missed out on some very important bonding.
Dennis and I behaved ourselves and Shelley wasn't born til 4 1/2 years later. I was 23 1/2 and Dennis was almost 27 so we were at the top of our game as far as raising babies by that time. Either Shelley was a perfect baby or we had learned how to appreciate the little life we'd created. Either way, she was the easiest of all to raise.
As in every life and marriage, circumstances control the outcome no matter how good your intentions are. We made mistakes but we did the best we could. Neither one of us had very good role models to show us the way so we had to improvise. Our girls grew into wonderful women who never failed to make us proud of them. Secretly, we were never sure how they managed to survive our parenting.
Site Meter Chipping Away At My Confidence
When I first installed the Site Meter I was blown away by the information I received from it. I could see that some of my readers came from as far away as China, Singapore, etc. and that filled my mind with wonder. How had they found me?
Well, I've learned a little more about the site meter and now I know a bit about how they found me...and how long some of them took to read the words I'd crafted. A lot of my readers took 0 seconds to read my blogs. What the hell?
My confidence level dipped a smidgeon but then I thought...that's not what counts. What does count is that I have fun doing this and if even one person likes to read it then that's the real bonus.
My topic for today is a comment on flea market shopping. I was out at my own flea market stall yesterday cleaning and redisplaying what was already there. All around me were stalls selling the remnants of days past...there isn't much you can't find at a good flea market. In some ways it's like wandering through a museum.
The flea markets I frequent in Florida seem to sell mainly brand new junk but I much prefer an old time place that sells nice, used items...not necessarily antiques. My flea market is filled to the rafters with interesting old stuff. Years before I got my own stall I used to enjoy shopping there myself. It's about 1/2 hour drive from home and I'd often spend a couple of hours browsing through the mishmash of items from yesteryear.
There's a romanticism about finding things our parents or grandparents once had in their own homes. For us oldsters, it's interesting to find the things we threw away a few years ago are now worth big bucks. I love glassware of most any kind. If it's old then that's all the better because it comes with a story.
When I'm at my own flea market I spend most of the time tidying but I still like to wander around to see what else is available. It always amazes me.
Well, I've learned a little more about the site meter and now I know a bit about how they found me...and how long some of them took to read the words I'd crafted. A lot of my readers took 0 seconds to read my blogs. What the hell?
My confidence level dipped a smidgeon but then I thought...that's not what counts. What does count is that I have fun doing this and if even one person likes to read it then that's the real bonus.
My topic for today is a comment on flea market shopping. I was out at my own flea market stall yesterday cleaning and redisplaying what was already there. All around me were stalls selling the remnants of days past...there isn't much you can't find at a good flea market. In some ways it's like wandering through a museum.
The flea markets I frequent in Florida seem to sell mainly brand new junk but I much prefer an old time place that sells nice, used items...not necessarily antiques. My flea market is filled to the rafters with interesting old stuff. Years before I got my own stall I used to enjoy shopping there myself. It's about 1/2 hour drive from home and I'd often spend a couple of hours browsing through the mishmash of items from yesteryear.
There's a romanticism about finding things our parents or grandparents once had in their own homes. For us oldsters, it's interesting to find the things we threw away a few years ago are now worth big bucks. I love glassware of most any kind. If it's old then that's all the better because it comes with a story.
When I'm at my own flea market I spend most of the time tidying but I still like to wander around to see what else is available. It always amazes me.
Monday, April 16, 2007
Some Things We'll Be Embarrassed About in Twenty Years
I watched a couple of young men walking ahead of me today. What caught my attention was the odd way they were walking. Their pants were slung so low the crotch was at knee length and they had to walk with their feet spread pretty wide apart to keep the pants from dropping down around their ankles. They looked for all the world as though they'd had an accident in their pants.
I know this is the style and, even though it looks silly to older people, I understand the young men's attempt at setting their generation apart from the previous one. Every generation does the same thing and every generation looks back on the styles of their younger years with a mixture of horror and laughter.
My generation has to carry the shame of the beehive hairdo. In the 50's and 60's we backcombed our hair into towers above our heads, hairsprayed it until it felt like stone, and then decorated it with little bows. Looking back, we all looked as though we had huge deformed heads.
I asked my daughter who is a 70's child what styles from that era fill her with shame. She couldn't come up with one. She said that all those styles have re-emerged and are fashionable again. Maybe there's hope for a return of the beehive hairdo.
I know this is the style and, even though it looks silly to older people, I understand the young men's attempt at setting their generation apart from the previous one. Every generation does the same thing and every generation looks back on the styles of their younger years with a mixture of horror and laughter.
My generation has to carry the shame of the beehive hairdo. In the 50's and 60's we backcombed our hair into towers above our heads, hairsprayed it until it felt like stone, and then decorated it with little bows. Looking back, we all looked as though we had huge deformed heads.
I asked my daughter who is a 70's child what styles from that era fill her with shame. She couldn't come up with one. She said that all those styles have re-emerged and are fashionable again. Maybe there's hope for a return of the beehive hairdo.
Sunday, April 15, 2007
The Infamous Words of Don Imus
Don Imus is the radio personality who referred to the women on a college basketball team as "nappy headed ho's". I was as angry as most people when I heard this but I'm a little dismayed by all the protesters I'm seeing in the news. It seems they're all most insulted by the words "nappy headed" and not too concerned that these women were also called "ho's" (or whores).
Imagine how any of us would feel if we or our daughters were referred to as whores by anyone let along a radio announcer. Why are these protesters not outraged by this word?
Don Imus is a racist but he has also shown abominable disrespect for women of any color. If he'd spoken those words of me or mine I'd be looking for a good lawyer to sue his ass.
Imagine how any of us would feel if we or our daughters were referred to as whores by anyone let along a radio announcer. Why are these protesters not outraged by this word?
Don Imus is a racist but he has also shown abominable disrespect for women of any color. If he'd spoken those words of me or mine I'd be looking for a good lawyer to sue his ass.
My Favorite Mug
I tried adding this picture to my last blog but couldn't figure out how to do it. Anyway, here is a picture of the lovely mug my sweet grandchildren bought me many years ago. And now I'm going to refill it!! 
I'm Back Home
I'm back home after 1 1/2 days on the road. The trip was rather uneventful and, other than being forced to stay in a motel by myself the one night, the only other scares were the occasional crazy drivers I encountered.
It's great to be home. There's no place like it in the whole world...didn't someone write a song about that? Home is where your real things are...your 50 year old photos showing you when you were thin, your favorite recliner for watching T.V., your collections of whatever (mine are glassware), the dinnerware you bought for special occasions, silverware once owned by your Gramma, and your very own special pillow that nestles your head perfectly. Home is where you sigh, knowing you're where you belong.
I brought a lot of new stuff into my home this spring...tons of fabric, stuff to sell on Ebay or take to the flea market, a tree face (always wanted one), about 6 pair of shoes (too pretty to not buy), and a few bottles of rum and gin (okay, I lied to the border guard). Looking at the pile of loot, I wonder why I didn't exercise better control of my spending urges. Then I think, "well, I certainly won't shop like this next year!"...but I think I said the same thing last year.
I had coffee this morning in the special mug my grandchildren bought me for my birthday about 10 years ago. It never fails to bring a smile to my face in recollection of the day it was bought. My middle girl's 3 children took me out for lunch which Kyle, the only one with a wallet, paid for. Then we walked around the attached gift shop searching for the perfect gift. Kyle was so intent on pleasing me and shyly pointed out things I knew were too expensive but we finally chose a lovely, blue pottery mug. Tyson and Aeron stood solemnly by as Kyle drew the money from his little wallet and paid the cashier. It still brings tears to my eyes and it's a memory I'll cherish as long as I live.
Many of the "things" we have in our homes come with wonderful stories and memories. It's these attachments that make our house our home.
It's great to be home. There's no place like it in the whole world...didn't someone write a song about that? Home is where your real things are...your 50 year old photos showing you when you were thin, your favorite recliner for watching T.V., your collections of whatever (mine are glassware), the dinnerware you bought for special occasions, silverware once owned by your Gramma, and your very own special pillow that nestles your head perfectly. Home is where you sigh, knowing you're where you belong.
I brought a lot of new stuff into my home this spring...tons of fabric, stuff to sell on Ebay or take to the flea market, a tree face (always wanted one), about 6 pair of shoes (too pretty to not buy), and a few bottles of rum and gin (okay, I lied to the border guard). Looking at the pile of loot, I wonder why I didn't exercise better control of my spending urges. Then I think, "well, I certainly won't shop like this next year!"...but I think I said the same thing last year.
I had coffee this morning in the special mug my grandchildren bought me for my birthday about 10 years ago. It never fails to bring a smile to my face in recollection of the day it was bought. My middle girl's 3 children took me out for lunch which Kyle, the only one with a wallet, paid for. Then we walked around the attached gift shop searching for the perfect gift. Kyle was so intent on pleasing me and shyly pointed out things I knew were too expensive but we finally chose a lovely, blue pottery mug. Tyson and Aeron stood solemnly by as Kyle drew the money from his little wallet and paid the cashier. It still brings tears to my eyes and it's a memory I'll cherish as long as I live.
Many of the "things" we have in our homes come with wonderful stories and memories. It's these attachments that make our house our home.
Thursday, April 12, 2007
Bye For Now!
This will be my last posting until I get back home to Canada. I'm leaving Florida at about 4 A.M. tomorrow morning and hope to reach Beckley, West Virginia before I stop at 6 P.M. That's more than half way home. My distance depends on my stamina so I might stop earlier and then take 3 days on the road instead of 2. I enjoy the drive immensely, drive carefully, and keep a low profile when out in public so that I don't draw attention to the fact that I'm a woman travelling alone. Isn't it a shame that we live in a society where a woman my age has to carry a fear for her life and purse?
Today will be hot and sunny so I'll spend a lot of time at the pool, then do laundry and pack the few remaining things in the car. By suppertime, which will be a hamburger dinner at the clubhouse, the car will be fully packed and ready to go. I've already kissed and hugged dozens of people goodbye and will do the same tonight at the hamburger dinner.
I'm very anxious to be on my way so I know I won't sleep well tonight without the help of Tylenol P.M. As much fun and enjoyment that was had here this winter, I'm leaving with a happy heart filled with the anticipation of a good summer and then a return to Florida in October to do it all over again. In the back of my mind is always the thought that my winters in Florida are numbered because of age and finances. At best, there might be 5-6 more.
So, bye for now and I'll be back gabbing away in just a few days!
Today will be hot and sunny so I'll spend a lot of time at the pool, then do laundry and pack the few remaining things in the car. By suppertime, which will be a hamburger dinner at the clubhouse, the car will be fully packed and ready to go. I've already kissed and hugged dozens of people goodbye and will do the same tonight at the hamburger dinner.
I'm very anxious to be on my way so I know I won't sleep well tonight without the help of Tylenol P.M. As much fun and enjoyment that was had here this winter, I'm leaving with a happy heart filled with the anticipation of a good summer and then a return to Florida in October to do it all over again. In the back of my mind is always the thought that my winters in Florida are numbered because of age and finances. At best, there might be 5-6 more.
So, bye for now and I'll be back gabbing away in just a few days!
Wednesday, April 11, 2007
Cruel Words
An American radio personality has spent the past week eating his words. Somehow he doesn't come across as truly sorry for what he said on the air, though. Last week he was commenting on a college women's basketball game and laughingly described the women on one team as "nappy headed ho's". Did this guy just crawl out from under a rock? Surely he couldn't believe that he could get away with a public insult like that.
Words can hurt. They can destroy a person's self esteem. In this case, and in this enlightened world, I don't think those particular words will do any harm to the women but they've reminded us once again that some people of power and influence still believe they can say whatever pops into their bigoted little heads without consequences.
Throughout my life I've been the recipient of cruel words many times over and it's surprising how you don't forget them...or the person who spoke them. I believe they don't affect me any more but....isn't it interesting that there is a "but"? If we're strong we use personal insults to propel ourselves to succeed in life and I think I've done that fairly well. But....
Words can hurt. They can destroy a person's self esteem. In this case, and in this enlightened world, I don't think those particular words will do any harm to the women but they've reminded us once again that some people of power and influence still believe they can say whatever pops into their bigoted little heads without consequences.
Throughout my life I've been the recipient of cruel words many times over and it's surprising how you don't forget them...or the person who spoke them. I believe they don't affect me any more but....isn't it interesting that there is a "but"? If we're strong we use personal insults to propel ourselves to succeed in life and I think I've done that fairly well. But....
Tuesday, April 10, 2007
Getting Ready for Departure
The final week of a winter at the trailer park is usually a week filled with bustling activity followed by inactivity soaking up the sun at the pool. This year I've been cursed with rain and cool temperatures the past few days. Today it will be much warmer but there's still a chance of rain every day. I know, no-one cares!
I always leave my trailer neat and clean but this year I've cleaned a bit more thoroughly. A friend will arrive here in early October and has offered to clean and prepare my trailer for my return in late October. I can't have her thinking I'm a slob. There's only so much dust you can blame on 6 months of wind blowing through the closed windows. It actually does happen to a degree, though, because these trailers are not well constructed. A few well sheltered windows also have to be left slightly open so that there is a bit of air flow to combat mildew and mold.
As I was cleaning yesterday I decided to unhook my camera from the computer and, in the tangle of cords that flow in all directions, managed to remove the main plug. Later, while e-mailing a friend, the blue screen of death appeared and it wasn't long before I had no screen at all. Shocked at what I first thought was the early demise of my laptop, I traced my steps and discovered my error. All is now working well.
Some friends stopped by in the afternoon to let me know they were selling all the gorgeous rattan furniture in their Florida room. I phoned my friend, Carole, who just bought the trailer across the road but is now home in Canada. She bought the furniture and now I have to figure out how to pack it into her already crowded Florida room. It was just too good a deal to pass up, though, so I'll manage somehow. Her old furniture has to go but I'm not sure if we're allowed to take large items like that up to our dump site. In any case, I'm going to have to draw on the kindness, and strength, of some of the men around here.
A couple of friends and I went out for dinner and were surprised to see how close to our park the latest brush fire came. Firefighters managed to keep it from jumping the highway onto our side of the road but it still came within 1/2 mile of our park. Even if there is no outward sign, these brush fires can simmer beneath the surface of the ground and come back to life at any time. I was thankful for the rain.
My personal plan for today is to get some travelling money out of the bank. Gas is selling at about $2.85 a gallon here but Carole said it's $1.03 a litre (approximately $4.00 a gallon) back home. My little Honda is great on gas but it will still cost me about $125. to get home. One year it will be simply too expensive for me to drive at all.
But today I'm happy, healthy, and have a bit of work and a bit of play planned for the day. Life is good!
I always leave my trailer neat and clean but this year I've cleaned a bit more thoroughly. A friend will arrive here in early October and has offered to clean and prepare my trailer for my return in late October. I can't have her thinking I'm a slob. There's only so much dust you can blame on 6 months of wind blowing through the closed windows. It actually does happen to a degree, though, because these trailers are not well constructed. A few well sheltered windows also have to be left slightly open so that there is a bit of air flow to combat mildew and mold.
As I was cleaning yesterday I decided to unhook my camera from the computer and, in the tangle of cords that flow in all directions, managed to remove the main plug. Later, while e-mailing a friend, the blue screen of death appeared and it wasn't long before I had no screen at all. Shocked at what I first thought was the early demise of my laptop, I traced my steps and discovered my error. All is now working well.
Some friends stopped by in the afternoon to let me know they were selling all the gorgeous rattan furniture in their Florida room. I phoned my friend, Carole, who just bought the trailer across the road but is now home in Canada. She bought the furniture and now I have to figure out how to pack it into her already crowded Florida room. It was just too good a deal to pass up, though, so I'll manage somehow. Her old furniture has to go but I'm not sure if we're allowed to take large items like that up to our dump site. In any case, I'm going to have to draw on the kindness, and strength, of some of the men around here.
A couple of friends and I went out for dinner and were surprised to see how close to our park the latest brush fire came. Firefighters managed to keep it from jumping the highway onto our side of the road but it still came within 1/2 mile of our park. Even if there is no outward sign, these brush fires can simmer beneath the surface of the ground and come back to life at any time. I was thankful for the rain.
My personal plan for today is to get some travelling money out of the bank. Gas is selling at about $2.85 a gallon here but Carole said it's $1.03 a litre (approximately $4.00 a gallon) back home. My little Honda is great on gas but it will still cost me about $125. to get home. One year it will be simply too expensive for me to drive at all.
But today I'm happy, healthy, and have a bit of work and a bit of play planned for the day. Life is good!
Sunday, April 08, 2007
An Evening at Downtown Disney
Tonight we went over to Downtown Disney and strolled the busy stores and streets. The place was teeming with people...couples, families, oldsters, and youngsters, all of them with their own personal life stories. I'd bet they came from every country in the world judging by the myriad languages spoken.
My friends and I ate at the Earl of Sandwich and sat on the patio watching the children run through the intermittent spurts of a large fountain, laughing joyously when they got wet. Most were on vacation in Florida and having a wonderful time enjoying something free for a change. There is no admittance charge to Downtown Disney and it's really a pleasant place to while away a few hours, especially since no auto traffic is allowed there.
We received our free piece of Giardelli chocolate (more if we go through the line twice) and then watched tourists purchasing oyster shells which promised to hold at least one pearl. They did.
We walked through the little store where all Disney merchandise was under $10. and I spotted some Disney character sippy cups, original price $12 but now 4 for $10. I bought 4 to sell on Ebay.
With such a massive crowd of people winding their way in every direction, there was no rudeness, no wildness. Everyone seemed happy to be where they were and considerate in their movements. I wonder if the lively, but innocent, strains of Disney music heard unobtrusively in the background brought out the best in us?
As darkness fell, the lights came on and Downtown Disney looked like a fairyland. We bought ice-cream and sat on a patio watching the passers-by. We chatted about our lives past and present and thoroughly enjoyed this beautiful Florida evening in such pretty and interesting surroundings.
It was an evening that made us thankful for the experience.
My friends and I ate at the Earl of Sandwich and sat on the patio watching the children run through the intermittent spurts of a large fountain, laughing joyously when they got wet. Most were on vacation in Florida and having a wonderful time enjoying something free for a change. There is no admittance charge to Downtown Disney and it's really a pleasant place to while away a few hours, especially since no auto traffic is allowed there.
We received our free piece of Giardelli chocolate (more if we go through the line twice) and then watched tourists purchasing oyster shells which promised to hold at least one pearl. They did.
We walked through the little store where all Disney merchandise was under $10. and I spotted some Disney character sippy cups, original price $12 but now 4 for $10. I bought 4 to sell on Ebay.
With such a massive crowd of people winding their way in every direction, there was no rudeness, no wildness. Everyone seemed happy to be where they were and considerate in their movements. I wonder if the lively, but innocent, strains of Disney music heard unobtrusively in the background brought out the best in us?
As darkness fell, the lights came on and Downtown Disney looked like a fairyland. We bought ice-cream and sat on a patio watching the passers-by. We chatted about our lives past and present and thoroughly enjoyed this beautiful Florida evening in such pretty and interesting surroundings.
It was an evening that made us thankful for the experience.
No Easter Bunny?
A mall here in the States (Florida, I think) is displaying all the accouterments of Easter to bring in customers but has decided to omit the word "Easter" because it represents a Christian holiday. Parents are paying big bucks to have their children's pictures taken sitting on the knee of a man dressed as the Easter Bunny but his title is simply "Bunny". That particular mall will be closed on Easter Sunday. Hmmm!
I don't think these decisions are being made by Americans and Canadians who have Christian backgrounds. It's entirely possible that if you follow the chain of command in businesses that are trying to eradicate our Christian rituals and culture you will find the top dog follows a different religion altogether. Either that or he/she is so terrified of being politically incorrect that he/she is brain dead.
We can put a stop to this immediately. Don't shop at those stores or malls. Don't hand over your hard earned dollars to anyone who is bent on eliminating our traditions. I already made that decision last December when "they" tried to take away our Christmas tree and even the word "Christmas".
We are many and we are powerful. Don't mess with Santa or the Easter Bunny! They may be Christian symbols but they're also an integral part of our culture and no-one has the right to immigrate here and take it away.
I don't think these decisions are being made by Americans and Canadians who have Christian backgrounds. It's entirely possible that if you follow the chain of command in businesses that are trying to eradicate our Christian rituals and culture you will find the top dog follows a different religion altogether. Either that or he/she is so terrified of being politically incorrect that he/she is brain dead.
We can put a stop to this immediately. Don't shop at those stores or malls. Don't hand over your hard earned dollars to anyone who is bent on eliminating our traditions. I already made that decision last December when "they" tried to take away our Christmas tree and even the word "Christmas".
We are many and we are powerful. Don't mess with Santa or the Easter Bunny! They may be Christian symbols but they're also an integral part of our culture and no-one has the right to immigrate here and take it away.
Saturday, April 07, 2007
Crime
I watch the news on T.V. every morning and become very depressed about how many human beings inflict pain and death on their fellow man. Why are we like this? Is humanity so seriously flawed that even social mores and laws can't keep us under control?
We have to be able to justify in our own mind that what we are doing is acceptable to us. How does one justify raping a child or murdering an innocent bystander? The perpetrator, once caught, will first lie and then, when the lies don't work, cry about his/her terrible childhood. Then they will find a lawyer willing to fight their cause and this is why we have no respect for lawyers.
My sister-in-law was a lawyer before retiring and I've asked her how a lawyer can represent someone who is obviously guilty. She said that it isn't her job to determine guilt. But what about her moral obligations to her client's victims? I guess I'll never understand this line of reasoning.
Most of us conduct our lives to the best of our ability... working and supporting our families, paying our taxes, and trying to be decent people. But underneath that facade lies some degree of deceit and cruelty which we have to struggle to control. Self discipline determines whether or not we act on our inner selfishness.
I used to think the church was what kept us half way civilized until their leaders were arrested for molesting children. No one has come forward to explain to us how a guilty priest or pastor could justify his actions. Apparently practicing religion doesn't necessarily make us decent.
Criminals have all kinds of excuses about why they commit crimes. What it all boils down to is that they have no self discipline and have allowed their personal selfishness to take precedence over the rights of anyone else.
I know "good" people. But they're not perfect. And maybe that's the best we can do.
We have to be able to justify in our own mind that what we are doing is acceptable to us. How does one justify raping a child or murdering an innocent bystander? The perpetrator, once caught, will first lie and then, when the lies don't work, cry about his/her terrible childhood. Then they will find a lawyer willing to fight their cause and this is why we have no respect for lawyers.
My sister-in-law was a lawyer before retiring and I've asked her how a lawyer can represent someone who is obviously guilty. She said that it isn't her job to determine guilt. But what about her moral obligations to her client's victims? I guess I'll never understand this line of reasoning.
Most of us conduct our lives to the best of our ability... working and supporting our families, paying our taxes, and trying to be decent people. But underneath that facade lies some degree of deceit and cruelty which we have to struggle to control. Self discipline determines whether or not we act on our inner selfishness.
I used to think the church was what kept us half way civilized until their leaders were arrested for molesting children. No one has come forward to explain to us how a guilty priest or pastor could justify his actions. Apparently practicing religion doesn't necessarily make us decent.
Criminals have all kinds of excuses about why they commit crimes. What it all boils down to is that they have no self discipline and have allowed their personal selfishness to take precedence over the rights of anyone else.
I know "good" people. But they're not perfect. And maybe that's the best we can do.
Friday, April 06, 2007
My Playmate Went Home
My sister-in-law, Faye, left for home today and I can't believe how boring it is here without her. Granted, she pops in for coffee every morning and I spend most of every day with her but I thought I had a busy life beyond her. I've got lots of friends here but most have also left for home and the ones that are still here aren't my closest buddies. I'm feeling a little lonely.
I thought for a brief moment of heading home around Wednesday instead of next Friday/Saturday but I don't dare. The man who started redoing my basement last August has finally resumed work after 6 months stoppage (I wasn't there so he didn't think he had to be, either) and apparently moved crap up to my livingroom. I don't want to go home to a mess. If I wait to leave on Friday and threaten him with his life I might have a chance of walking into a house as neat as I left it. I'm sort of stuck here for a whole week...without Faye.
One of my closer buddies lives right across the road from me here but she's an inside person and I hate to be indoors when the weather is nice. The park has emptied considerably so I don't get the walk by company that I normally do, either. One good thing is that I can play on the computer for hours without people storming in and telling me to get the hell off and go with them to whatever we had planned. We must always look on the upside.
This is a way of life I only have in this Florida trailer park. At home the pace is ever so much slower and I spend more time on the computer. My family comes by occasionally and so do my neighbors but it isn't an everyday/all day thing like it is here. I still see Faye about 2-3 times a week, though. No wonder I'm lost without her today!
Oh well, I can console myself with constantly checking on the site meter I attached to my blogs. I had been thrilled to discover they were being read in China but I've since found out that they're also being read in Spain and Turkey!! I'm utterly amazed. How the heck did they find me?
I thought for a brief moment of heading home around Wednesday instead of next Friday/Saturday but I don't dare. The man who started redoing my basement last August has finally resumed work after 6 months stoppage (I wasn't there so he didn't think he had to be, either) and apparently moved crap up to my livingroom. I don't want to go home to a mess. If I wait to leave on Friday and threaten him with his life I might have a chance of walking into a house as neat as I left it. I'm sort of stuck here for a whole week...without Faye.
One of my closer buddies lives right across the road from me here but she's an inside person and I hate to be indoors when the weather is nice. The park has emptied considerably so I don't get the walk by company that I normally do, either. One good thing is that I can play on the computer for hours without people storming in and telling me to get the hell off and go with them to whatever we had planned. We must always look on the upside.
This is a way of life I only have in this Florida trailer park. At home the pace is ever so much slower and I spend more time on the computer. My family comes by occasionally and so do my neighbors but it isn't an everyday/all day thing like it is here. I still see Faye about 2-3 times a week, though. No wonder I'm lost without her today!
Oh well, I can console myself with constantly checking on the site meter I attached to my blogs. I had been thrilled to discover they were being read in China but I've since found out that they're also being read in Spain and Turkey!! I'm utterly amazed. How the heck did they find me?
Thursday, April 05, 2007
The Problem Family Member
Every family has at least one member who makes everyone want to scream in frustration. Mine is my beloved grandson, Chooch. Chooch has never been able to get his life on track and yet he's the most lovable young man in the world.
In grade school, he spent more time being suspended than any other child in the school. It was never for anything terribly serious. He spit out the window; he wouldn't stop talking; he pushed another child. The school autohorities hounded my daughter to put Chooch on Ritalin because he obviously was afflicted with ADD (or ADHD). We, as a family, were adamant that he shouldn't be put on drugs and, after being psychologically evaluated at my daughter's expense, Chooch was found to not have ADD. Just think what harm could have been done to this child if we'd caved in to the school authorities. His mother always felt that what he suffered from was BRAT, anyway.
Chooch's grades were terrible even though he was always very bright. He couldn't concentrate or stay still long enough to learn anything from books and yet he was seldom kept back a grade in school. At 15 he entered high school, barely able to read and totally unable to function without constant supervision. Teachers are in short order in high school and couldn't devote enough time to him alone so he finally just dropped out. My daughter, poor soul, had struggled with being a working single mother and desperately trying to help Chooch with his homework but to no avail. His frustration level was too high and her physical and emotional strength not strong enough.
Chooch eventually moved out on his own and supported himself with various low paid jobs. At each new job he was welcomed with open arms because he's so friendly, good natured, and works hard. Before too long he'd get bored and start skipping work or fool around until he broke something on the job. He seems to live for the day and not worry about tomorrow so he doesn't realize how his actions affect the rest of his life.
Then there are his friends. He has one wonderful friend who has stuck by him since grade school and tries hard to steer Chooch the right way. But Chooch is just too friendly and generous with anyone who is nice to him and he seems to attract a lot of users.
Chooch recently found a full time job in a restaurant and his brother was managing his paycheck for him. Things were going relatively well. Yesterday his apartment building was declared in imminent danger of collapsing and everyone was evacuated, unable to return for clothes or furniture. He is currently staying with his brother and wondering when I'll be home. Oh oh!!
In grade school, he spent more time being suspended than any other child in the school. It was never for anything terribly serious. He spit out the window; he wouldn't stop talking; he pushed another child. The school autohorities hounded my daughter to put Chooch on Ritalin because he obviously was afflicted with ADD (or ADHD). We, as a family, were adamant that he shouldn't be put on drugs and, after being psychologically evaluated at my daughter's expense, Chooch was found to not have ADD. Just think what harm could have been done to this child if we'd caved in to the school authorities. His mother always felt that what he suffered from was BRAT, anyway.
Chooch's grades were terrible even though he was always very bright. He couldn't concentrate or stay still long enough to learn anything from books and yet he was seldom kept back a grade in school. At 15 he entered high school, barely able to read and totally unable to function without constant supervision. Teachers are in short order in high school and couldn't devote enough time to him alone so he finally just dropped out. My daughter, poor soul, had struggled with being a working single mother and desperately trying to help Chooch with his homework but to no avail. His frustration level was too high and her physical and emotional strength not strong enough.
Chooch eventually moved out on his own and supported himself with various low paid jobs. At each new job he was welcomed with open arms because he's so friendly, good natured, and works hard. Before too long he'd get bored and start skipping work or fool around until he broke something on the job. He seems to live for the day and not worry about tomorrow so he doesn't realize how his actions affect the rest of his life.
Then there are his friends. He has one wonderful friend who has stuck by him since grade school and tries hard to steer Chooch the right way. But Chooch is just too friendly and generous with anyone who is nice to him and he seems to attract a lot of users.
Chooch recently found a full time job in a restaurant and his brother was managing his paycheck for him. Things were going relatively well. Yesterday his apartment building was declared in imminent danger of collapsing and everyone was evacuated, unable to return for clothes or furniture. He is currently staying with his brother and wondering when I'll be home. Oh oh!!
Wednesday, April 04, 2007
I'm My Worst Critic (maybe)
The story I'm writing is coming along not so bad but every time I read it I find considerable fault with it. If it was written on paper I'd have erased a hole in it already. I started writing this story with loads of confidence that it might not be spectacular but it would be pleasant reading...but it really isn't. My story line is good but the sentences just sound flat. Nobody talks the way I'm writing.
I've enjoyed writing the blogs because they fly out of my fingers onto the keyboard like conversations. I certainly don't do much editing...maybe a few spelling corrections. This is the way I like to write, casual and down to earth. I wish my story writing was as easy.
At home I have quite a few children's stories written but I've been too afraid to show them to anyone. If no-one reads them and laughs at them then I can convince myself that there's still hope for me. All my life I've thought that inside of me was a talented writer just waiting to spring out and astound the world.
Maybe I'll never write a decent story but I still have the dream.
I've enjoyed writing the blogs because they fly out of my fingers onto the keyboard like conversations. I certainly don't do much editing...maybe a few spelling corrections. This is the way I like to write, casual and down to earth. I wish my story writing was as easy.
At home I have quite a few children's stories written but I've been too afraid to show them to anyone. If no-one reads them and laughs at them then I can convince myself that there's still hope for me. All my life I've thought that inside of me was a talented writer just waiting to spring out and astound the world.
Maybe I'll never write a decent story but I still have the dream.
My Visit to China/Taiwan
In 1989 my husband had to go to China on business and his boss, his brother, allowed him to take me with him. It was such a magnificent opportunity and I've always thought of it as the trip of a lifetime.
We flew to Vancouver, then to Shanghai, and then arrived in Beijing late at night. The flight had taken 19 hours if I remember correctly. Dennis' contact met us at the airport and arranged for the taxi to the Beijing Hotel. I remember thinking it was like a dream to enter that fabulous old hotel, especially since there were no lights on outside and only faint lights inside. They wisely conserve power at night.
One of my favorite memories is of the lovely crocheted doilies that sat on the backs of the chairs, even in the lobby. It all seemed so quaint and from another age.
Dennis spent most of his days with businessmen so I was free to roam around the area. I felt very safe but my colorful clothing and caucasian face brought many curious stares. The Chinese people at that time seemed to wear nothing but blue or brown, even the children. Occasionally someone would politely approach me and test their knowledge of English.
I walked through Tianamin (spelling?) Square and saw far off in one corner a Kentucky Fried Chicken restaurant...American influx of businesses was just starting at that time. I also toured the Forbidden Palace which was one of the the highlights of my trip. When you entered the Forbidden City, you were given headphones which directed you on the tour in the language of your choice. The headphones could be stopped or started when you reached the described area. The Forbidden City is massive and so full of history and culture. In the gift shop I purchased a few water color paintings that I'll always treasure.
Much of the time we were in China we had an English speaking interpreter along with us. Our little lady took me shopping and tried to convince me to buy a beautiful sculptured wooden vase that I turned my nose up at. Instead I bought 2 porcelain vases covered in appliqued flowers and vines. In later years I discovered that the sculptured vase would have accelerated in value while the porcelain vases became a common sight in stores back in Canada. I have no class.
Our guide took us on a tour to the Great Wall of China. I can't describe how thrilling it was to walk along this famous wall. The part we walked on seemed to be all steps, though...going up. It wasn't long before my legs began to weaken. Not long after we started our trek we passed a Coca Cola stand and I remember thinking it was out of place on the Wall. About 1/2 hour later I would have killed for a nice cold Coke.
At one point I was looking through the viewfinder of my camera and I saw a spectacular sight. Dennis was surrounded by soldiers while our little guide was jumping up and down screaming her head off. Chinese visitors on the wall were also surrounding the whole group yelling at the soldiers. Dennis just stood there with a cigarette in hand and looking completely befuddled. Apparently we'd not seen a "no smoking" sign posted because the wall is a national monument. Dennis was a hard core smoker and he was outside so therefore he smoked. Not on the Great Wall, though! He was fined the equivalent of $3.00 Cdn. Our angry guide and bystanders weren't able to convince the soldiers that they should give the Canadian visitor a break. To be fined on the Great Wall of China...what a story!
One of our side trips in China was south of Beijing. I don't remember the name of the city but it's basic fuel was coal and every outside surface...window sills, etc. was covered in a film of coal dust. A common sight on the street was face masks worn by the citizens to preserve their lungs.
We travelled by train from city to city and the countryside was beautiful. The scenery wasn't like the Canadian or U.S. but had a unique quality of it's own that seemed older somehow. As though it had existed long before America. That sounds silly but that's how it looked to me.
The trains were also an experience. The backs of the seats were graced with those lovely doilies and many passengers had brought along glass jars. Soon a lady came along and poured boiling water into each of the jars. Apparently the passengers brought their own tea, too. How simple and economic! We Canadians and Americans are definitely spoiled but we pay a high price for it.
The last leg of our trip was to Taiwan. It was very different from China, very crowded and cosmopolitan in comparison. Dennis, being frugal (for a better word), decided the hotel we were booked into was too expensive ($120 per night)so he moved us to another hotel ($95 per night)with a room so small there was barely room for the bed. The compressors for the hotel were right outside our window and ran 24 hours a day. We argued. He won. I became unfriendly.
One day I decided to take a walk around the neighborhood but the street signs were all in Chinese. It didn't take long for me to get lost even though I'd counted the blocks...I have no sense of direction. I hailed a taxi which took me up 1/2 a block and over 1/2 block to my hotel. The taxi driver must have thought I was one lazy north american!
Overall, my memories of this wondrous trip fill me with amazement at times. Did I really visit China? Did I really walk on the Great Wall? How fortunate I was to have this experience in my lifetime.
We flew to Vancouver, then to Shanghai, and then arrived in Beijing late at night. The flight had taken 19 hours if I remember correctly. Dennis' contact met us at the airport and arranged for the taxi to the Beijing Hotel. I remember thinking it was like a dream to enter that fabulous old hotel, especially since there were no lights on outside and only faint lights inside. They wisely conserve power at night.
One of my favorite memories is of the lovely crocheted doilies that sat on the backs of the chairs, even in the lobby. It all seemed so quaint and from another age.
Dennis spent most of his days with businessmen so I was free to roam around the area. I felt very safe but my colorful clothing and caucasian face brought many curious stares. The Chinese people at that time seemed to wear nothing but blue or brown, even the children. Occasionally someone would politely approach me and test their knowledge of English.
I walked through Tianamin (spelling?) Square and saw far off in one corner a Kentucky Fried Chicken restaurant...American influx of businesses was just starting at that time. I also toured the Forbidden Palace which was one of the the highlights of my trip. When you entered the Forbidden City, you were given headphones which directed you on the tour in the language of your choice. The headphones could be stopped or started when you reached the described area. The Forbidden City is massive and so full of history and culture. In the gift shop I purchased a few water color paintings that I'll always treasure.
Much of the time we were in China we had an English speaking interpreter along with us. Our little lady took me shopping and tried to convince me to buy a beautiful sculptured wooden vase that I turned my nose up at. Instead I bought 2 porcelain vases covered in appliqued flowers and vines. In later years I discovered that the sculptured vase would have accelerated in value while the porcelain vases became a common sight in stores back in Canada. I have no class.
Our guide took us on a tour to the Great Wall of China. I can't describe how thrilling it was to walk along this famous wall. The part we walked on seemed to be all steps, though...going up. It wasn't long before my legs began to weaken. Not long after we started our trek we passed a Coca Cola stand and I remember thinking it was out of place on the Wall. About 1/2 hour later I would have killed for a nice cold Coke.
At one point I was looking through the viewfinder of my camera and I saw a spectacular sight. Dennis was surrounded by soldiers while our little guide was jumping up and down screaming her head off. Chinese visitors on the wall were also surrounding the whole group yelling at the soldiers. Dennis just stood there with a cigarette in hand and looking completely befuddled. Apparently we'd not seen a "no smoking" sign posted because the wall is a national monument. Dennis was a hard core smoker and he was outside so therefore he smoked. Not on the Great Wall, though! He was fined the equivalent of $3.00 Cdn. Our angry guide and bystanders weren't able to convince the soldiers that they should give the Canadian visitor a break. To be fined on the Great Wall of China...what a story!
One of our side trips in China was south of Beijing. I don't remember the name of the city but it's basic fuel was coal and every outside surface...window sills, etc. was covered in a film of coal dust. A common sight on the street was face masks worn by the citizens to preserve their lungs.
We travelled by train from city to city and the countryside was beautiful. The scenery wasn't like the Canadian or U.S. but had a unique quality of it's own that seemed older somehow. As though it had existed long before America. That sounds silly but that's how it looked to me.
The trains were also an experience. The backs of the seats were graced with those lovely doilies and many passengers had brought along glass jars. Soon a lady came along and poured boiling water into each of the jars. Apparently the passengers brought their own tea, too. How simple and economic! We Canadians and Americans are definitely spoiled but we pay a high price for it.
The last leg of our trip was to Taiwan. It was very different from China, very crowded and cosmopolitan in comparison. Dennis, being frugal (for a better word), decided the hotel we were booked into was too expensive ($120 per night)so he moved us to another hotel ($95 per night)with a room so small there was barely room for the bed. The compressors for the hotel were right outside our window and ran 24 hours a day. We argued. He won. I became unfriendly.
One day I decided to take a walk around the neighborhood but the street signs were all in Chinese. It didn't take long for me to get lost even though I'd counted the blocks...I have no sense of direction. I hailed a taxi which took me up 1/2 a block and over 1/2 block to my hotel. The taxi driver must have thought I was one lazy north american!
Overall, my memories of this wondrous trip fill me with amazement at times. Did I really visit China? Did I really walk on the Great Wall? How fortunate I was to have this experience in my lifetime.
Tuesday, April 03, 2007
I Am Read In China
Once I got my site meter in place I started to delve into all it would show me about who was reading my blogs. Lo and behold, over the last 4-5 hours about 1/3 of visitors to my blog site were from China. I am so impressed! And flattered!! It would be nice if more of the people who read my blogs would leave a comment. I'd love to know what they think of the subjects I choose to write about.
This is such a pleasurable outlet for someone like me who loves to write but doesn't fool herself that she's a real "writer". Anyway, getting the site meter installed will just make blogging more interesting for me.
Write back sometime, okay??
This is such a pleasurable outlet for someone like me who loves to write but doesn't fool herself that she's a real "writer". Anyway, getting the site meter installed will just make blogging more interesting for me.
Write back sometime, okay??
Site Meter
How can I explain the problems I've had trying to insert a site meter on my blogs? I tried a few times in the past year and couldn't figure out what Site Meter was telling me to do so I just kept cancelling it. This last attempt sent me to the Blogger help section where I threw myself on the mercy of anyone willing to take the time to explain to me, in "infant" language, how to do it. A very nice person answered my request quickly but apparently didn't believe I'm as dumb as I am and explained the process as though directing the explanation to a 10 year old. I'm not that good! Then I got the bright idea to go into the help section of Site Meter and follow the directions. Simple, you say? Nooooo!
I was smart enough to print out a few directions but I haven't a clue where I got them...I've been struggling with this supposed simple task for too long. These directions were almost down to my level but I was able to follow them okay. I was told to go onto the "layout" or "template" link on my blog. Whoopee! I found it!!
Then I was told I'd be on the "add and arrange page element". Sure enough, there it was. Now I was getting excited. Next I was told to click on the "add on" link. There was none. Unbelievably, I'd gotten this far and my damn page had no "add on" link. I searched around a bit but finally gave up and almost cancelled the Site Meter once again.
Today I had finished writing my blog and decided, just for the heck of it, to look at the layout page again. The "ad on" link was there!! Suddenly it disappeared again and I was furious. If I was the paranoid type I would have thought that Blogger.com was playing tricks with this poor old lady. I went in and out of the site and couldn't get that link back. So I went out to lunch.
Just now I tried again and the link was there. I did a few odd things (not sure what) and was finally able to put Site Meter on my blog site. I'm not sure but I think it might only be on the last blog I wrote, though. Guess I'll find out soon.
P.S. I just published this blog and the site meter was there. I am so happy!
P.P.S. I just checked my older blogs and the site meter is on them also. I'm so happy I could spit.
I was smart enough to print out a few directions but I haven't a clue where I got them...I've been struggling with this supposed simple task for too long. These directions were almost down to my level but I was able to follow them okay. I was told to go onto the "layout" or "template" link on my blog. Whoopee! I found it!!
Then I was told I'd be on the "add and arrange page element". Sure enough, there it was. Now I was getting excited. Next I was told to click on the "add on" link. There was none. Unbelievably, I'd gotten this far and my damn page had no "add on" link. I searched around a bit but finally gave up and almost cancelled the Site Meter once again.
Today I had finished writing my blog and decided, just for the heck of it, to look at the layout page again. The "ad on" link was there!! Suddenly it disappeared again and I was furious. If I was the paranoid type I would have thought that Blogger.com was playing tricks with this poor old lady. I went in and out of the site and couldn't get that link back. So I went out to lunch.
Just now I tried again and the link was there. I did a few odd things (not sure what) and was finally able to put Site Meter on my blog site. I'm not sure but I think it might only be on the last blog I wrote, though. Guess I'll find out soon.
P.S. I just published this blog and the site meter was there. I am so happy!
P.P.S. I just checked my older blogs and the site meter is on them also. I'm so happy I could spit.
Spousal Abuse
There is a couple here who have made the winter miserable for their neighbors. The couple are serious alcoholics and possibly druggies. Way too often the man will beat the woman up and the police are called. Even more often there are public arguments raging between the two combatants which move into the street and disturb or frighten the seniors living nearby. After every altercation the woman returns to her abuser within a day.
I don't know these people because the man works and the woman stays inside her trailer all day. They don't associate with the rest of us and, to be honest, most of us are not interested in forming any kind of friendship with them. But we worry that one day he'll kill her.
Police and psychologists know that the percentage of women who repeatedly return to their abusers is very high. It's been written that the women have had their pride and self-esteem beaten out of them. Deep down they must know their man will never change but they must have hope that they'll survive in the long run.
There are many women who feel that living without a man is impossible. But I have met many women who, like me, are very happy to be on their own and with no intention of ever bringing a man into their lives again. Women really are becoming stronger and less dependent on men to provide for them. I've always stressed to my daughters and granddaughters that they should pursue careers that will support them in the event that their husbands or future husbands fall by the wayside. They have been taught to have respect for themselves and never suffer abuse from anyone. There is nothing sadder than an abused woman who is totally dependant on her abuser.
The only hope I see to eradicate the problem is to preach self-respect to children and teach them the difference between self-respect and selfishness. If we truly understand that every human being, even ourselves, has the right to love and kindness, then we won't accept anything less. If parents can't be relied upon to spread the word then the job falls upon the school teachers.
I'm very proud of the strong women in my family and the strong men they've chosen as mates.
I don't know these people because the man works and the woman stays inside her trailer all day. They don't associate with the rest of us and, to be honest, most of us are not interested in forming any kind of friendship with them. But we worry that one day he'll kill her.
Police and psychologists know that the percentage of women who repeatedly return to their abusers is very high. It's been written that the women have had their pride and self-esteem beaten out of them. Deep down they must know their man will never change but they must have hope that they'll survive in the long run.
There are many women who feel that living without a man is impossible. But I have met many women who, like me, are very happy to be on their own and with no intention of ever bringing a man into their lives again. Women really are becoming stronger and less dependent on men to provide for them. I've always stressed to my daughters and granddaughters that they should pursue careers that will support them in the event that their husbands or future husbands fall by the wayside. They have been taught to have respect for themselves and never suffer abuse from anyone. There is nothing sadder than an abused woman who is totally dependant on her abuser.
The only hope I see to eradicate the problem is to preach self-respect to children and teach them the difference between self-respect and selfishness. If we truly understand that every human being, even ourselves, has the right to love and kindness, then we won't accept anything less. If parents can't be relied upon to spread the word then the job falls upon the school teachers.
I'm very proud of the strong women in my family and the strong men they've chosen as mates.
Sunday, April 01, 2007
Just a Moment
I had a rare day to myself today and used part of the morning to amble around the flea market. Half of the stalls were closed for the summer...Florida would be lost without the snowbirds...but I did manage to buy an old set of salt and pepper shakers for $1.
I left the flea market and drove up to Ross' hoping they'd gotten some new bathing suits in but they hadn't so I moved on to Beall's. Beall's is by far my favorite store and I think it can only be found in Florida. Whoever does their buying for them knows how a visitor to the south wants to dress...the fabric colors and patterns are bright, light, and scrumptious. Both quality and price are good, too. Because I was by myself I could spend all the time I wanted just browsing but I finally bought a terrific Alia shirt that was 40% off.
When I finished shopping it was close to 1 P.M. so I drove to a nearby Red Lobster for lunch. My waiter, who could have been my son-in-law's (David) twin, moaned loudly "Are you all by yourself???". Why do people think it's sad to eat alone? Sometimes it's pleasant and that's how it was today.
I placed my order and then sat quietly observing the diners around me. Very close was a dear little family of Mom, Dad, and three little girls. The youngest girl had pushed her chair right up against her father's and, the whole time I was there, demanded his full attention. She chattered away to him in Spanish and occasionally had to recapture his attention by calling "Poppy!".
What impressed me was his calm exterior. He never chastised her or acted as though he resented the fact that his other children weren't getting their fair share of him...not to mention his wife. My guess is that he might possibly be a soldier who had been away for a while and the little girl just couldn't get enough of him. Her mother noticed me watching and smiled at me. I'm glad she understood I wasn't being critical but was just enjoying the family's dynamics.
Jason, my waiter, brought my lunch of deep fried flounder (I'd asked for broiled), mashed potatoes (notice, no fries), salad, and those unbelievably tasty cheese buscuits.
Pretty darned nice day out by myself!
I left the flea market and drove up to Ross' hoping they'd gotten some new bathing suits in but they hadn't so I moved on to Beall's. Beall's is by far my favorite store and I think it can only be found in Florida. Whoever does their buying for them knows how a visitor to the south wants to dress...the fabric colors and patterns are bright, light, and scrumptious. Both quality and price are good, too. Because I was by myself I could spend all the time I wanted just browsing but I finally bought a terrific Alia shirt that was 40% off.
When I finished shopping it was close to 1 P.M. so I drove to a nearby Red Lobster for lunch. My waiter, who could have been my son-in-law's (David) twin, moaned loudly "Are you all by yourself???". Why do people think it's sad to eat alone? Sometimes it's pleasant and that's how it was today.
I placed my order and then sat quietly observing the diners around me. Very close was a dear little family of Mom, Dad, and three little girls. The youngest girl had pushed her chair right up against her father's and, the whole time I was there, demanded his full attention. She chattered away to him in Spanish and occasionally had to recapture his attention by calling "Poppy!".
What impressed me was his calm exterior. He never chastised her or acted as though he resented the fact that his other children weren't getting their fair share of him...not to mention his wife. My guess is that he might possibly be a soldier who had been away for a while and the little girl just couldn't get enough of him. Her mother noticed me watching and smiled at me. I'm glad she understood I wasn't being critical but was just enjoying the family's dynamics.
Jason, my waiter, brought my lunch of deep fried flounder (I'd asked for broiled), mashed potatoes (notice, no fries), salad, and those unbelievably tasty cheese buscuits.
Pretty darned nice day out by myself!
Eating/Drinking One's Self to Death
Think it can't be done? Well, one of our residents here seems to be making a valiant attempt to do just that. In this park we have more opportunities to overeat than most other places on earth. We have regular potlucks which is nothing more than a monstrous buffet. We have hamburger dinners every 2 weeks and luncheons every Tuesday. We have donuts and coffee in the clubhouse every Saturday and even the occasional full breakfast. Then, of course, there was the cruise where food reigned 24 hours a day. There are also countless groups of people heading out to eat meals at restaurants every day.
The resident mentioned is a very nice man who loves (or lives) to eat. It's been noticed that he eats extremely large portions at every function and then even brags about the enormous quantities he consumes daily. He was a heart attack waiting to happen. He was taken to the hospital yesterday with a racing heartbeat and the doctors are keeping him in intensive care while they complete their tests. It all really makes me wonder why we abuse our bodies so badly.
A lady stopped by for a surprise visit yesterday and somehow we got onto the topic of drinking too much booze. She is a lovely, well put-together lady who no-one (not even me) would ever know is a very heavy drinker. During our conversation she confessed that she drinks 8-9 alcoholic beverages every day...and does so because she has to. But she emphasized that she isn't an alcoholic. Because we don't know each other very well, I think she was using me as a sounding board. I wish I'd had the strength to advise her to get help with her problem but I didn't. It wasn't the right time, I guess.
I'm still on my potato chip/french fry free diet. This is my feeble attempt to make myself a bit healthier and I hope it helps. I feel good but just have to look in the mirror to see how I've abused this poor old body. We all have our demons in some form and have to deal with them the best we can. Instead of turning to booze or infidelity when I had my life struggles, I turned to potato chips. Isn't that silly?
I've never advocated being a vegetarian or exercising until there isn't an ounce of fat left on your body but there has to be a happy medium. If I had it to do over again I'd be more aware of my body needs instead of taking it for granted. This old body is the only thing we have to get us around and we might be able to replace a few worn out parts but the chassis is with us for life.
The resident mentioned is a very nice man who loves (or lives) to eat. It's been noticed that he eats extremely large portions at every function and then even brags about the enormous quantities he consumes daily. He was a heart attack waiting to happen. He was taken to the hospital yesterday with a racing heartbeat and the doctors are keeping him in intensive care while they complete their tests. It all really makes me wonder why we abuse our bodies so badly.
A lady stopped by for a surprise visit yesterday and somehow we got onto the topic of drinking too much booze. She is a lovely, well put-together lady who no-one (not even me) would ever know is a very heavy drinker. During our conversation she confessed that she drinks 8-9 alcoholic beverages every day...and does so because she has to. But she emphasized that she isn't an alcoholic. Because we don't know each other very well, I think she was using me as a sounding board. I wish I'd had the strength to advise her to get help with her problem but I didn't. It wasn't the right time, I guess.
I'm still on my potato chip/french fry free diet. This is my feeble attempt to make myself a bit healthier and I hope it helps. I feel good but just have to look in the mirror to see how I've abused this poor old body. We all have our demons in some form and have to deal with them the best we can. Instead of turning to booze or infidelity when I had my life struggles, I turned to potato chips. Isn't that silly?
I've never advocated being a vegetarian or exercising until there isn't an ounce of fat left on your body but there has to be a happy medium. If I had it to do over again I'd be more aware of my body needs instead of taking it for granted. This old body is the only thing we have to get us around and we might be able to replace a few worn out parts but the chassis is with us for life.
Saturday, March 31, 2007
Losing Words
Most of us, as we grow older, begin to have brain farts. We'll be chattering away when, all of a sudden, the word we want won't come to mind. I've been having these brain farts for years and adjusted to replacing the word I wanted with another one. It's sort of funny because when we replace a word we often take a step up in our vocabulary and, in doing so, sound rather uppity.
With all the talk about senility and Alzeimers in seniors, we can become a bit nervous when we forget anything. But most of the time we're able to laugh it off. Last summer there were 5 of us older ladies having lunch and one was telling an interesting story. She stopped suddenly, forgetting the next word and looked to the lady on her right for help. That lady, in turn, looked to her right for help. This went around the table until the look landed back on the original lady. We sat there laughing like teenagers.
I love writing on the computer because I can substitute a word when the one I want has escaped me and then insert it later if and when it comes to mind. When I consider how much I learn with every new day, the amount I forget doesn't compare. I think I'm still ahead of the game!
With all the talk about senility and Alzeimers in seniors, we can become a bit nervous when we forget anything. But most of the time we're able to laugh it off. Last summer there were 5 of us older ladies having lunch and one was telling an interesting story. She stopped suddenly, forgetting the next word and looked to the lady on her right for help. That lady, in turn, looked to her right for help. This went around the table until the look landed back on the original lady. We sat there laughing like teenagers.
I love writing on the computer because I can substitute a word when the one I want has escaped me and then insert it later if and when it comes to mind. When I consider how much I learn with every new day, the amount I forget doesn't compare. I think I'm still ahead of the game!
Friday, March 30, 2007
Death of a Lizard
The other night I walked through the bathroom to my bedroom and spotted a streak of black practically fly from one side of the room to the other (the bathroom is possibly 6' wide). It moved so fast I couldn't tell what it was...I was also screeching like a banshee...and just assumed it was a cockroach. Madder than hell that a cockroach had found it's way inside my trailer I pulled out a can of Raid and sprayed all over the little bathroom, unable to see the intruder but bound it wasn't going to escape into another room.
Raid isn't good for human lungs. I choked, backed into the livingroom, returned to the bathroom to spray once more, choked, etc., etc., etc.
Slowly, a tiny little lizard dragged it's poor, poisoned body from behind the sink taps and died right in front of me. Now I was not only poisoned myself but I'd killed a harmless little lizard. The air was rancid with the smell of Raid and I didn't want to handle the lizard. I decided to just close the door and go to bed.
The next morning I disposed of the lizard and aired out the house. All is well!
Raid isn't good for human lungs. I choked, backed into the livingroom, returned to the bathroom to spray once more, choked, etc., etc., etc.
Slowly, a tiny little lizard dragged it's poor, poisoned body from behind the sink taps and died right in front of me. Now I was not only poisoned myself but I'd killed a harmless little lizard. The air was rancid with the smell of Raid and I didn't want to handle the lizard. I decided to just close the door and go to bed.
The next morning I disposed of the lizard and aired out the house. All is well!
Writing a Story
I've decided to write a story and have been busy getting it started. I've spent my winters in this senior park since 1998 and have been amazed, aghast, dismayed, and titillated by true life stories which occur here. We jokingly refer to it as a senior Peyton Place. In truth, it is rich with material for many stories. The story I've started to write is a blended mixture of personalities and events, carefully concocted to disguise the true players. This will be my summer project and, when I get enough nerve to present it, it will be by blog.
In the meantime, life goes on here at the senior park and every day now someone is leaving for home. Usually I hate this time of year but I'm kind of happy it's all winding down and I can get back to Canada and all that awaits me there.
Many have left already and more will go over the next few days. By Monday, the park will be very quiet. My plan is to spend lots of time at the pool until I leave for home on April 15th. It will be rather peaceful to have mainly do-nothing days because I've been hard pressed all winter to find an empty day. I jump from one interest to another and just hate to miss out on anything going on...but that is the shape of my winters, not my summers, so I'm not going to complain about not having much empty time.
I'm sending a load of stuff home with a couple who live near me in Canada. My own car trunk is full and I still have a fair amount of stuff to pack in the back seat. How do I manage to do this every year? Yesterday I bought a computer monitor which is in a fair sized box which will take up a lot of the back seat. Now I'm getting worried...but what's new? I really must try to cut back next year.
In the meantime, life goes on here at the senior park and every day now someone is leaving for home. Usually I hate this time of year but I'm kind of happy it's all winding down and I can get back to Canada and all that awaits me there.
Many have left already and more will go over the next few days. By Monday, the park will be very quiet. My plan is to spend lots of time at the pool until I leave for home on April 15th. It will be rather peaceful to have mainly do-nothing days because I've been hard pressed all winter to find an empty day. I jump from one interest to another and just hate to miss out on anything going on...but that is the shape of my winters, not my summers, so I'm not going to complain about not having much empty time.
I'm sending a load of stuff home with a couple who live near me in Canada. My own car trunk is full and I still have a fair amount of stuff to pack in the back seat. How do I manage to do this every year? Yesterday I bought a computer monitor which is in a fair sized box which will take up a lot of the back seat. Now I'm getting worried...but what's new? I really must try to cut back next year.
Thursday, March 29, 2007
Cute Story
My neighbor was pushing a little girl on a swing and asked her how old she was. The little girl said "stop the swing!" Ron thought something was wrong so he quickly brought the swing to a stop. The little girl let go of one swing rope and held up her hand showing 3 fingers.
Now, isn't that a cute story?
Now, isn't that a cute story?
Wednesday, March 28, 2007
What Americans Know About Canada
When I come to Florida for the winter I almost feel like I'm at home. At least half of my friends are American but we don't differentiate here. If you like someone they can be from Mars and they'd still be friends. But...every once in a while we Canadians discover how very little some Americans know about Canada.
The other day I went up to the pool early and got into conversation with a lady I'd never met before. I don't know if she spends the winter here or is just in for a short time. In any case, we started talking and she asked me where I was from. I told her "Ontario in Canada". She replied "I'm always amazed at how well you people speak English". What the hell????
I then told her she might be thinking of Quebec and that really threw her because she'd never heard of Quebec. I wonder if she knows there are even more countries in the world outside the U.S.A.?
The other day I went up to the pool early and got into conversation with a lady I'd never met before. I don't know if she spends the winter here or is just in for a short time. In any case, we started talking and she asked me where I was from. I told her "Ontario in Canada". She replied "I'm always amazed at how well you people speak English". What the hell????
I then told her she might be thinking of Quebec and that really threw her because she'd never heard of Quebec. I wonder if she knows there are even more countries in the world outside the U.S.A.?
Tuesday, March 27, 2007
A Sad Day
One of our friends passed away unexpectedly yesterday and tears flowed all over the park. We care for each other here and no passing goes unnoticed.
The widow was understandably beside herself with grief but was surrounded by caring friends from the beginning. We sheltered her as best we could, giving her a shoulder to cry on. One lady notified their relatives at home and then contacted the insurance company who would make travel arrangements to take the deceased and his wife back home to Canada.
I watched in admiration as the widow took control of herself over the span of a few hours and gained inner strength to carry her through the ordeal still to come. This couple had been married for 54 years, had 4 children, and were fortunate enough to keep their marriage a happy one. It will be very difficult for this lady to be on her own without her precious spouse beside her...but she will survive. She will be strong for her children and her grandchildren. She will be strong because she has to be.
There were brief moments yesterday when she even laughed a bit, remembering the good times they'd had over the years. We let her talk at length about their life together because that will help her heal. Occasionally a tear would fall but she'd drag herself right back to the task at hand...getting through it. Her daughter flew in last night so now we who are just friends can take a step back and let mother and daughter gain strength from each other. This is all part of the healing process and there are still miles to go.
The widow was understandably beside herself with grief but was surrounded by caring friends from the beginning. We sheltered her as best we could, giving her a shoulder to cry on. One lady notified their relatives at home and then contacted the insurance company who would make travel arrangements to take the deceased and his wife back home to Canada.
I watched in admiration as the widow took control of herself over the span of a few hours and gained inner strength to carry her through the ordeal still to come. This couple had been married for 54 years, had 4 children, and were fortunate enough to keep their marriage a happy one. It will be very difficult for this lady to be on her own without her precious spouse beside her...but she will survive. She will be strong for her children and her grandchildren. She will be strong because she has to be.
There were brief moments yesterday when she even laughed a bit, remembering the good times they'd had over the years. We let her talk at length about their life together because that will help her heal. Occasionally a tear would fall but she'd drag herself right back to the task at hand...getting through it. Her daughter flew in last night so now we who are just friends can take a step back and let mother and daughter gain strength from each other. This is all part of the healing process and there are still miles to go.
Sunday, March 25, 2007
Inspiration
Vanessa Redgrave is currently doing a monologue on stage written about how a woman coped with the death of her husband and daughter. It got me thinking.
When my husband passed away I couldn't rid my house of all his belongings fast enough. Each item was too powerful a reminder of Dennis in his healthy days and it disturbed me deeply to see them around the house...his house.
I sent monstrous piles of clothes to my grandson's church and gave untold piles of paperwork and momentos to my children...our children.
We used a few large, framed photographs at his funeral. Some went to my children and some were supposed to remain with me. It became too difficult for me to see those pictures of him so they also were passed along to my children. His wedding ring, and mine, are in a little silk bag next to him inside the mausoleum niche where his ashes are interred.
Two articles of his clothing I kept. One was a leather jacket that eventually went to one of our grandsons...I hadn't offered it originally because I thought he might feel uncomfortable wearing it but he was thrilled when I did give it to him. The other item was Dennis' leather moccasins. I can't give them away and I can't stand to see them so they're tucked away in the back of a closet. It tears me up now thinking about those darned shoes. Somehow they've become my connection to a man I loved with all my heart at one time.
Why the shoes, I wonder?
When my husband passed away I couldn't rid my house of all his belongings fast enough. Each item was too powerful a reminder of Dennis in his healthy days and it disturbed me deeply to see them around the house...his house.
I sent monstrous piles of clothes to my grandson's church and gave untold piles of paperwork and momentos to my children...our children.
We used a few large, framed photographs at his funeral. Some went to my children and some were supposed to remain with me. It became too difficult for me to see those pictures of him so they also were passed along to my children. His wedding ring, and mine, are in a little silk bag next to him inside the mausoleum niche where his ashes are interred.
Two articles of his clothing I kept. One was a leather jacket that eventually went to one of our grandsons...I hadn't offered it originally because I thought he might feel uncomfortable wearing it but he was thrilled when I did give it to him. The other item was Dennis' leather moccasins. I can't give them away and I can't stand to see them so they're tucked away in the back of a closet. It tears me up now thinking about those darned shoes. Somehow they've become my connection to a man I loved with all my heart at one time.
Why the shoes, I wonder?
Family
A big chunk of our family back home gathered to celebrate my sister-in-law's birthday on Friday...she turned 75. Because it was most convenient, they opened up another sister-in-law's house (she's here in Florida) and had ONE of the parties there. It would have been so nice to be there but I'm rejoicing in the fact that my family is still so close and loving that they made a point of getting together for this monumental birthday.
My daughter mentioned that family get-togethers are so much more relaxed than gatherings of friends. With family you don't have to put on a front...they've seen every aspect of you already. It's also important that with family you are in a place where you belong.
When I married into my husband's family it was a real eye opener. They were everything that a family should be...close, caring, and supportive. They gathered me in, as they do with every newcomer to the family, and I consider them no different than brothers and sisters to me. My children were raised right along with their cousins and have remained friends to this day. What is like balm to my soul is that the following generation of children are also friends. How wonderful!
Sure, we have the odd family member we simply tolerate, but "we are family". That simple phrase has the strength of steel.
My daughter mentioned that family get-togethers are so much more relaxed than gatherings of friends. With family you don't have to put on a front...they've seen every aspect of you already. It's also important that with family you are in a place where you belong.
When I married into my husband's family it was a real eye opener. They were everything that a family should be...close, caring, and supportive. They gathered me in, as they do with every newcomer to the family, and I consider them no different than brothers and sisters to me. My children were raised right along with their cousins and have remained friends to this day. What is like balm to my soul is that the following generation of children are also friends. How wonderful!
Sure, we have the odd family member we simply tolerate, but "we are family". That simple phrase has the strength of steel.
Saturday, March 24, 2007
I Gave Up Fries
Never have I been able to diet without severe hunger and misery defeating my attempts. One of the tricks to losing weight is to only give up one item that is bad for you. I gave up potato chips as my 2007 new year's resolution and haven't had any cravings. I was going to give up french fries for my 2008 new year's resolution but decided to start early. It's been a week and so far so good.
I normally eat a fairly healthy diet but I crave salt...sprinkled on potato chips and fries. Since giving up the chips I haven't noticed any difference in my weight so maybe I've just been eating more fries to compensate. It will be interesting to see what happens with both the chips and fries out of my life. I'll let you know!
I normally eat a fairly healthy diet but I crave salt...sprinkled on potato chips and fries. Since giving up the chips I haven't noticed any difference in my weight so maybe I've just been eating more fries to compensate. It will be interesting to see what happens with both the chips and fries out of my life. I'll let you know!
Pool Day
We spent a lot of time at the pool today. No-body swims, though, but just floats around in conversation groups. If you looked into our pool on a busy day you'd see a half dozen groupings of seniors floating around on noodles. The noodles are colorful and so are our swimsuits so it looks kind of pretty.
Some of us played "Farkle" in between pool dips. It's a dice game that we also play over in the clubhouse. Almost everyone has a nice, healthy tan except me. I look as though I just arrived...well, not quite but it's that cursed Irish skin!
Since I'm leaving here in three weeks, I'll spend as much time as I can at the pool. During the day it's the place to be, the place to meet friends, and the place to cool off. How lucky we are!
Some of us played "Farkle" in between pool dips. It's a dice game that we also play over in the clubhouse. Almost everyone has a nice, healthy tan except me. I look as though I just arrived...well, not quite but it's that cursed Irish skin!
Since I'm leaving here in three weeks, I'll spend as much time as I can at the pool. During the day it's the place to be, the place to meet friends, and the place to cool off. How lucky we are!
Friday, March 23, 2007
Getting By
I completed the purchase of my friend Carole's trailer this morning. We're so happy we could spit!! The lady who sold it stayed on a while and we talked about various things but one of the conversations got me thinking.
We're told that we should always have 3 months salary tucked away so that it will tide us over if our jobs disappear. I don't know anyone who has been able to do that. How many people who are paying a mortgage and raising a family can afford to set aside about $7-8000 (and up) in case of an emergency? It never happened in my household. Even today, my backup is my line of credit.
I'm told that in order to purchase a nice house these days the buyer has to take on a 50 year mortgage and sometimes can only afford to pay the interest on the loan for the rest of their lives, thereby never really owning their own home. Part of the problem lies with buying above our means but even older houses have become so costly that it's impossible for people earning minimum wage to buy one.
When my husband and I bought our 13 year old house back in 1968 it cost $19,000. Our family income at the time was probably around $10,000 a year. Today, a house in my neighborhood (almost 40 years later) is worth around $200,000. The average income is maybe $50,000 so you can see how much more difficult it is for a family to buy a house in this day and age. I honestly don't know how they do it.
For many years it has been almost necessary for a family to have two incomes in order to get by. In my family, we kept our expectations lower and managed with one regular income and me working part-time. There was never much money for luxuries but we did okay. I used to think that modern families just needed to cut back on their expenses and they'd do as well as my generation did but it's becoming more apparent that the cost of living has simply gotten too high for them to get ahead.
When my husband and I retired I told my children that we'd be spending all of their potential inheritance during our golden years. My lovely children said "go right ahead!" I'm hoping there'll be a bit left for them, though.
We're told that we should always have 3 months salary tucked away so that it will tide us over if our jobs disappear. I don't know anyone who has been able to do that. How many people who are paying a mortgage and raising a family can afford to set aside about $7-8000 (and up) in case of an emergency? It never happened in my household. Even today, my backup is my line of credit.
I'm told that in order to purchase a nice house these days the buyer has to take on a 50 year mortgage and sometimes can only afford to pay the interest on the loan for the rest of their lives, thereby never really owning their own home. Part of the problem lies with buying above our means but even older houses have become so costly that it's impossible for people earning minimum wage to buy one.
When my husband and I bought our 13 year old house back in 1968 it cost $19,000. Our family income at the time was probably around $10,000 a year. Today, a house in my neighborhood (almost 40 years later) is worth around $200,000. The average income is maybe $50,000 so you can see how much more difficult it is for a family to buy a house in this day and age. I honestly don't know how they do it.
For many years it has been almost necessary for a family to have two incomes in order to get by. In my family, we kept our expectations lower and managed with one regular income and me working part-time. There was never much money for luxuries but we did okay. I used to think that modern families just needed to cut back on their expenses and they'd do as well as my generation did but it's becoming more apparent that the cost of living has simply gotten too high for them to get ahead.
When my husband and I retired I told my children that we'd be spending all of their potential inheritance during our golden years. My lovely children said "go right ahead!" I'm hoping there'll be a bit left for them, though.
Thursday, March 22, 2007
A Mean God?
I received one of those e-mails today that was probably meant to encourage all the people who read it to fear god's wrath and run to their nearest church. I know the lady who sent it to me is a sweet and loving lady but this e-mail struck me the wrong way.
My problems with religion start right at the church and it's leaders. If there really is a powerful and all knowing god why do we have to reach him through an organization of undercover sinners who continually beg for our money?
My personal vision of "god" is of an undescribable entity that guides us while we're still here on earth and enfolds us when we die. My "god" doesn't torture and murder someone just because they choose to ignore him/her. Most religions seem to teach that atheists will burn in hell but what of the atheists who spend their lives caring for others and living decent, law abiding lives? My "god" would love these people.
All my life I've seen wars waged in the name of religion. Remember the religious fanatics who were responsible for the horror of 9/11? I often envy truly religious people because they receive much comfort from their religion but I have no respect for fanatics who preach hatred for anyone who doesn't follow their doctrine.
I've found in my lifetime that most church goers really do try to live decent lives and obey the principles of their religion but too many of the church leaders have fallen from grace. With human beings, too much power tends to corrupt and that is true of organized religion.
Logic tells me that we aren't here by accident and that there has to be some explanation for our existence. The most beautiful things in this world aren't man made but part of nature. There's only one way to find the answer and I'm not ready to go yet but, when my time comes, I'll trust my instincts. It's gonna be nice there!
My problems with religion start right at the church and it's leaders. If there really is a powerful and all knowing god why do we have to reach him through an organization of undercover sinners who continually beg for our money?
My personal vision of "god" is of an undescribable entity that guides us while we're still here on earth and enfolds us when we die. My "god" doesn't torture and murder someone just because they choose to ignore him/her. Most religions seem to teach that atheists will burn in hell but what of the atheists who spend their lives caring for others and living decent, law abiding lives? My "god" would love these people.
All my life I've seen wars waged in the name of religion. Remember the religious fanatics who were responsible for the horror of 9/11? I often envy truly religious people because they receive much comfort from their religion but I have no respect for fanatics who preach hatred for anyone who doesn't follow their doctrine.
I've found in my lifetime that most church goers really do try to live decent lives and obey the principles of their religion but too many of the church leaders have fallen from grace. With human beings, too much power tends to corrupt and that is true of organized religion.
Logic tells me that we aren't here by accident and that there has to be some explanation for our existence. The most beautiful things in this world aren't man made but part of nature. There's only one way to find the answer and I'm not ready to go yet but, when my time comes, I'll trust my instincts. It's gonna be nice there!
Alone Again
Marilee left yesterday so I spent the night alone...not much difference...and the morning alone...no jokes, no bustling activity. I miss her!
We drove Marilee to the airport late yesterday afternoon and stopped at a Ci Ci's Pizzeria on the way for dinner. I asked Marilee if she'd been comfortable staying with me and she gave me the most wonderful compliment. She said she has never felt more comfortable or welcome staying in anyone else's home. It made me feel as though I'd done something right. I was so happy to have her stay with me but, remember, I don't cook so that could have been a problem. Marilee just added my empty fridge to her repertoire of funny stories. And she likes eating in restaurants, too. And Faye took pity on us more than once by feeding us.
We dropped Marilee off at the airport at 6 P.M., kissed and hugged, and then drove away. The car felt empty of Marilee's vibrant spirit and I missed her.
We drove Marilee to the airport late yesterday afternoon and stopped at a Ci Ci's Pizzeria on the way for dinner. I asked Marilee if she'd been comfortable staying with me and she gave me the most wonderful compliment. She said she has never felt more comfortable or welcome staying in anyone else's home. It made me feel as though I'd done something right. I was so happy to have her stay with me but, remember, I don't cook so that could have been a problem. Marilee just added my empty fridge to her repertoire of funny stories. And she likes eating in restaurants, too. And Faye took pity on us more than once by feeding us.
We dropped Marilee off at the airport at 6 P.M., kissed and hugged, and then drove away. The car felt empty of Marilee's vibrant spirit and I missed her.
Wednesday, March 21, 2007
Bugs
I have an abhorence of bugs. Here in the sunny south the lord of bugs is the cockroach and they could find their way inside a rock. It's been so nice this winter because I haven't seen one bug inside my trailer...until this morning.
Right beside the computer desk, just a little too close to my feet, lay a half dead cockroach. It was succumbing to the deadly concoction my bug man sprays around the trailer once a month. My habit is to let it completely die before I try to dispose of it. I certainly don't want it springing to life in my hand! I am a strong Canadian woman but it's times like this that I wish I had a man around the house.
My husband used to say "look at the size of that little bug and look at the size of you!" and expect me to stop being afraid. He'd even pick the damn thing up when it's little legs were still moving. Yuk!
There isn't much logic to why so many women (not all) are afraid of bugs. We just don't like them. My granddaughter, Aeron, was terrified of little spiders but she allowed someone to lay a big fat snake around her shoulders at Gatorland.
My intruding cockroach was still moving after I started this blog so I sprayed it with Raid to hasten it's death. It should be sufficiently dead soon and then I can gingerly flush it down the toilet...I don't even want it in my garbage.
Right beside the computer desk, just a little too close to my feet, lay a half dead cockroach. It was succumbing to the deadly concoction my bug man sprays around the trailer once a month. My habit is to let it completely die before I try to dispose of it. I certainly don't want it springing to life in my hand! I am a strong Canadian woman but it's times like this that I wish I had a man around the house.
My husband used to say "look at the size of that little bug and look at the size of you!" and expect me to stop being afraid. He'd even pick the damn thing up when it's little legs were still moving. Yuk!
There isn't much logic to why so many women (not all) are afraid of bugs. We just don't like them. My granddaughter, Aeron, was terrified of little spiders but she allowed someone to lay a big fat snake around her shoulders at Gatorland.
My intruding cockroach was still moving after I started this blog so I sprayed it with Raid to hasten it's death. It should be sufficiently dead soon and then I can gingerly flush it down the toilet...I don't even want it in my garbage.
Tuesday, March 20, 2007
Coffee Morning
This is a picture of my coffee morning ladies. For about 1 1/2 hours every Tuesday morning we settle the affairs of the world and the park. Settling the park affairs is by far the hardest. From the first day we started our coffee morning we had one rule and that was "no bitchin"...I know I mentioned this before but I really like this rule.
We try not to talk about health issues, either, but this morning one of the ladies who joined us is recovering from a cancer scare. Thankfully, the tumor was benign and she is recovering beautifully. We're always thankful when someone gets good news on that subject.
I've mentioned also how much we laugh here. When you look at the face of it, we're aging ladies with all the small or large problems that come with age but we are blessed with so much enjoyment in our latter years. I know I never laughed as much or had my days so well filled with happiness when I was younger. Maybe the fact that we're older and wiser makes us more appreciative of what we have. Every one of these ladies has a long lifetime of stories and they choose to tell the funny ones. They've already dealt with the rough ones.
Sunday, March 18, 2007
1/2 Gone
My niece and her family left today so my sister-in-law and her husband moved back into their own trailer. I still have Marilee. She's moved out into the Florida room so now we have a proper little livingroom to hang out in.
No-one would believe that we trailer trash enjoy having company who fill up our little trailers with all their crap but it's true. There's such a sense of comeraderie when we're all falling over each other, laughing, and telling wild stories. One thing I didn't like and that's the fact that they've filled my fridge with food that I'll have to get rid of before I leave to go home. These people like to snack.
It's kind of cold this morning because we had a cold front come through. Marilee's been bitching all morning about how I don't turn on the furnace or have my stove hooked up. She's obviously forgotten how to camp out! She mellowed a bit when we went out for a nice breakfast, though.
Faye and Gary have disappeared and I'm sure they're up at their own trailer trying to shovel it out after Val and her family left. I ventured up there yesterday and it looked like the clothing department at Target had erupted in the Florida room. Faye was gallantly ignoring the chaos and busy preparing a lovely little snack in her miniature kitchen. She'd prepare food in the midst of a world war.
I've been thinking about why I haven't been upset about the utter chaos in my own trailer and have come to the conclusion that all the laughter offsets the confusion caused by too many people in too small a space. I'm already looking forward to Marilee's visit next year!
No-one would believe that we trailer trash enjoy having company who fill up our little trailers with all their crap but it's true. There's such a sense of comeraderie when we're all falling over each other, laughing, and telling wild stories. One thing I didn't like and that's the fact that they've filled my fridge with food that I'll have to get rid of before I leave to go home. These people like to snack.
It's kind of cold this morning because we had a cold front come through. Marilee's been bitching all morning about how I don't turn on the furnace or have my stove hooked up. She's obviously forgotten how to camp out! She mellowed a bit when we went out for a nice breakfast, though.
Faye and Gary have disappeared and I'm sure they're up at their own trailer trying to shovel it out after Val and her family left. I ventured up there yesterday and it looked like the clothing department at Target had erupted in the Florida room. Faye was gallantly ignoring the chaos and busy preparing a lovely little snack in her miniature kitchen. She'd prepare food in the midst of a world war.
I've been thinking about why I haven't been upset about the utter chaos in my own trailer and have come to the conclusion that all the laughter offsets the confusion caused by too many people in too small a space. I'm already looking forward to Marilee's visit next year!
Friday, March 16, 2007
Marilee, the Wayward Child
My sister-in-law, Marilee, is staying with me for 10 days. She's over at the clubhouse doing morning excercises right now so I'm taking this opportunity to write a blog about her. Her sister, Faye, and I decided it should be titled "wayward child" because that is what she is.
Marilee is so much fun to be around and she keeps you wondering what she'll do next. She talks to everyone she meets and is known to us the "f" word without thinking. Faye and Gary told her she can't use that word around their grandchildren who are also visiting this week but we secretly think they use it themselves when the adults aren't around.
When we're out and about Marilee veers off in her own little world to see whatever catches her eye or attention. Often we don't notice it happen and then we're scared to death we've lost her. No fear...she has a good sense of direction and always finds her way back.
She loves to tease me about my half empty fridge and disconnected stove but I think she likes to eat out as much as I do. She's been a joy to have around and I'm going to miss her terribly when she leaves. But we'll see the irreverant little devil in August at the family reunion in New Brunswick. Think of all the laughs we have to look forward to!
Marilee is so much fun to be around and she keeps you wondering what she'll do next. She talks to everyone she meets and is known to us the "f" word without thinking. Faye and Gary told her she can't use that word around their grandchildren who are also visiting this week but we secretly think they use it themselves when the adults aren't around.
When we're out and about Marilee veers off in her own little world to see whatever catches her eye or attention. Often we don't notice it happen and then we're scared to death we've lost her. No fear...she has a good sense of direction and always finds her way back.
She loves to tease me about my half empty fridge and disconnected stove but I think she likes to eat out as much as I do. She's been a joy to have around and I'm going to miss her terribly when she leaves. But we'll see the irreverant little devil in August at the family reunion in New Brunswick. Think of all the laughs we have to look forward to!
Sand Hill Cranes
These are pictures of the Sand Hill Cranes and their 2 babies. The bottom picture includes Carole's new acquisition...her trailer. These cranes are part of the every day life at our park and we call them "the boys". They wander the winding roads most of the day and have little or no fear of humans. You just can't approach them close enough to touch. With the babies, I'm sure the parents would attack you if you got too close.
One of my favorite funny memories
is one day when my husband was in our front yard desperately trying to pull start a gas lawn mower. He'd yank and yank with no luck. One of the "boys" wandered up the road with long, elegant strides and stopped to watch this demonstration. Soon another crane came along and stopped to watch also. Dennis continued to yank on the lawn mower cord until there were 5 large cranes standing together watching him. They'd bend their heads from side to side in wonder and amazement at the antics this silly human was performing.Dennis was in no mood to think this was cute but I did.
Wednesday, March 14, 2007
Wanna Go Home/Wanna Stay In Florida
All winter long I've had the strangest feeling that I should be back home. It wouldn't have bothered me one bit to hop in the car and head back to Canada. At the same time, I've enjoyed every day down here. It's like the lyrics of an old song "part of me says stay, part of me says go".
By mid March you can see the park has taken up a new atmosphere. People begin asking when you're going home or telling you when they're leaving. Goodbye parties start up. I usually hate this time of the season but this year I'm almost anxious to see the park revert back to the peaceful times of October. By April 1st most of the winter residents will be gone and the quiet that sets in used to make me sad. But this year is different. I think it's been normally hectic all winter but I seem to have aged a year and maybe I need a bit more peace and quiet in my life.
I was supposed to be home by April 15th but that happens to land on a Sunday. Since I like to travel on a Sunday I planned to leave on the 8th but decided that was just a bit too soon. I contacted my insurance lady and made arrangements to add 2 days to my plan so now I'm leaving here on Sunday, April 15th which gives me 2 weeks of mainly peaceful Florida time before I head home.
And then, once I'm home, I'll miss all of these wonderful people so darned much and be counting the days till I see many of them again at our summer reunion in July.
By mid March you can see the park has taken up a new atmosphere. People begin asking when you're going home or telling you when they're leaving. Goodbye parties start up. I usually hate this time of the season but this year I'm almost anxious to see the park revert back to the peaceful times of October. By April 1st most of the winter residents will be gone and the quiet that sets in used to make me sad. But this year is different. I think it's been normally hectic all winter but I seem to have aged a year and maybe I need a bit more peace and quiet in my life.
I was supposed to be home by April 15th but that happens to land on a Sunday. Since I like to travel on a Sunday I planned to leave on the 8th but decided that was just a bit too soon. I contacted my insurance lady and made arrangements to add 2 days to my plan so now I'm leaving here on Sunday, April 15th which gives me 2 weeks of mainly peaceful Florida time before I head home.
And then, once I'm home, I'll miss all of these wonderful people so darned much and be counting the days till I see many of them again at our summer reunion in July.
Tuesday, March 13, 2007
Picasa
If I live to be 1000 I might learn all there is to know about what's available on the internet...maybe. My sister-in-law, Marilee, just informed me about Picasa which is where you can store pictures and then put them on the web. I'm not sure if I need this but I can't seem to upload pictures from "my pictures" and place them in a blog. Maybe using Picasa I'll be able to do this. Right now I have no time. This is how my day went and is going...
Up at 3:30 A.M. to drive with Sheila who was taking Tom to the airport.
Had breakfast at 5A.M. at IHOP...kind of expensive.
Back to the trailer at 7 A.M. and found Marilee, Faye, and Gary still sleeping.
7:01 A.M. I am sleeping.
9:15 A.M. I wake up and find no-one busy making coffee for my coffee morning and no-one is around.
The phone rings and it's one coffe drinker wondering where her coffee is.
I make coffee, people arrive and we drink till almost 11 A.M.
11 A.M. Gail arrives with a golf ball sized lump on her hand and Sheila rushes her to a nurse in the park. We haven't heard back from that yet.
11:30 is lunch at the clubhouse and I am not hungry.
This afternoon is pool time and then we're going to the liquor store at 4 P.M. This will be followed by a soup supper at 5 or 6 and then we have games night at 7 P.M.
I'm glad I had a nap.
Up at 3:30 A.M. to drive with Sheila who was taking Tom to the airport.
Had breakfast at 5A.M. at IHOP...kind of expensive.
Back to the trailer at 7 A.M. and found Marilee, Faye, and Gary still sleeping.
7:01 A.M. I am sleeping.
9:15 A.M. I wake up and find no-one busy making coffee for my coffee morning and no-one is around.
The phone rings and it's one coffe drinker wondering where her coffee is.
I make coffee, people arrive and we drink till almost 11 A.M.
11 A.M. Gail arrives with a golf ball sized lump on her hand and Sheila rushes her to a nurse in the park. We haven't heard back from that yet.
11:30 is lunch at the clubhouse and I am not hungry.
This afternoon is pool time and then we're going to the liquor store at 4 P.M. This will be followed by a soup supper at 5 or 6 and then we have games night at 7 P.M.
I'm glad I had a nap.
Sunday, March 11, 2007
Another Funny Story
My youngest daughter just wrote that she slipped on some dog's blood and fell, bruising herself so badly that she had to spend the day in bed. It reminded me of the time her husband, John, suffered a fall...and we laughed.
John is the man who lost his leg in a helicopter crash. Well, as the story goes, he was walking down the hallway and his artificial leg started to bother him so he gave it a little kick. The leg flew off, up over his head and came down close enough to kick him in the butt. This caused him to fall. This could have been a sad situation but it was so ridiculous we had to laugh. Sorry, John.
I've never understood why people think it's funny when someone falls. They usually hurt themselves and there's nothing funny about that. I think it's the wild, out of control gyrations we go through as we fall that is funny. Of course, being kicked in the ass by your own toes is hilarious
John is the man who lost his leg in a helicopter crash. Well, as the story goes, he was walking down the hallway and his artificial leg started to bother him so he gave it a little kick. The leg flew off, up over his head and came down close enough to kick him in the butt. This caused him to fall. This could have been a sad situation but it was so ridiculous we had to laugh. Sorry, John.
I've never understood why people think it's funny when someone falls. They usually hurt themselves and there's nothing funny about that. I think it's the wild, out of control gyrations we go through as we fall that is funny. Of course, being kicked in the ass by your own toes is hilarious
Saturday, March 10, 2007
The Luau
Every year in March we have a sort of farewell party for the winter residents. It's called the "Luau" because the theme is Hawaiian...food, decorations, entertainment, and the guests get to wear flowery dresses and shirts. I don't go anymore because it bores me. I don't know why.
Golfing bores me but many people absolutely love golf. Football bores me but it's a national pastime. Western movies bore me but I love country music. We're all so different with our likes and dislikes. I'm noticing more that the people I chum around with don't necessarily share all of my particular likes and dislikes but we do have common ground. And that is what the friendship is based on. We kindly tolerate the differences and concentrate on the similarities. Most of them are at the luau tonight but one is coming to my house to share a glass of wine and some good conversation.
It's the diversity in personalities that makes people interesting. Wouldn't it be boring if everyone was the same?
Postscript: I had a full patio of guests tonight, some who didn't go to the luau and some who did but left early. It was a beautiful, warm evening and we sat out, drank a bit of wine, and laughed a lot.
Golfing bores me but many people absolutely love golf. Football bores me but it's a national pastime. Western movies bore me but I love country music. We're all so different with our likes and dislikes. I'm noticing more that the people I chum around with don't necessarily share all of my particular likes and dislikes but we do have common ground. And that is what the friendship is based on. We kindly tolerate the differences and concentrate on the similarities. Most of them are at the luau tonight but one is coming to my house to share a glass of wine and some good conversation.
It's the diversity in personalities that makes people interesting. Wouldn't it be boring if everyone was the same?
Postscript: I had a full patio of guests tonight, some who didn't go to the luau and some who did but left early. It was a beautiful, warm evening and we sat out, drank a bit of wine, and laughed a lot.
Thursday, March 08, 2007
My Son-In-Law
I have 3 sons-in-law but this blog is about the man who is married to my youngest daughter.
Shelley left home in Canada to work as a nurse in Texas and it was there she met John. Apparently it was very romantic...eye contact across a crowded room and love thereafter. I visited Shelley in Texas amd met John for the first time when they'd just started dating. I took one look at him...latino handsome, intelligent, well mannered, good family...and knew I'd lost my little girl. I've always loved John because he's a terrific human being but I never knew the true depths of the man until he was injured in a helicopter crash and lost his leg below the knee.
John is in the U.S. air force and was on a mission in south america when his helicopter crashed. It was touch and go for a while whether he'd survive but he did survive with an amputated leg. It was terribly traumatic for the whole family wondering what the future held for their little family...John, Shelley, Lisette, and Nicole.
I went down to Florida (where they were living at the time) and took care of the girls while John was in the hospital in Texas and Shelley was at his side. When John was able to come home I watched with amazement as this severely damaged young man took hold of his situation and began to work his way back to a "normal" life. His attitude was so good and his determination so strong...he strove for independence every moment of his day. His goal was to run within 3 months and he did reach his goal. Within a year he was flying helicopters again.
I'm sure he had moments when his confidence lagged but I never saw them. What I saw was a very brave man who accepted what fate had handed him and continued to be a success in his family life and in his chosen career.
Fourteen months after his accident, Shelley gave birth to their son, Jake. Today, 8 1/2 years later, their little family of 5 are happy, healthy, and living a wonderfully exciting life.
You chose well, Shelley.
Shelley left home in Canada to work as a nurse in Texas and it was there she met John. Apparently it was very romantic...eye contact across a crowded room and love thereafter. I visited Shelley in Texas amd met John for the first time when they'd just started dating. I took one look at him...latino handsome, intelligent, well mannered, good family...and knew I'd lost my little girl. I've always loved John because he's a terrific human being but I never knew the true depths of the man until he was injured in a helicopter crash and lost his leg below the knee.
John is in the U.S. air force and was on a mission in south america when his helicopter crashed. It was touch and go for a while whether he'd survive but he did survive with an amputated leg. It was terribly traumatic for the whole family wondering what the future held for their little family...John, Shelley, Lisette, and Nicole.
I went down to Florida (where they were living at the time) and took care of the girls while John was in the hospital in Texas and Shelley was at his side. When John was able to come home I watched with amazement as this severely damaged young man took hold of his situation and began to work his way back to a "normal" life. His attitude was so good and his determination so strong...he strove for independence every moment of his day. His goal was to run within 3 months and he did reach his goal. Within a year he was flying helicopters again.
I'm sure he had moments when his confidence lagged but I never saw them. What I saw was a very brave man who accepted what fate had handed him and continued to be a success in his family life and in his chosen career.
Fourteen months after his accident, Shelley gave birth to their son, Jake. Today, 8 1/2 years later, their little family of 5 are happy, healthy, and living a wonderfully exciting life.
You chose well, Shelley.
War at the Senior Park
One of our full time residents has taken serious offence to the newly enforced rules that smokers not congregate at the doorway to the clubhouse. She was so incensed with the rules which are, to be honest, mainly insisted on by the larger population of winter residents that she wrote a 2 page letter and posted it on our bulletin board. So far 2 other people signed it in agreement.
This is what she wants:
1. Smokers should be able to smoke in the parking lot leading into the clubhouse. (It still stinks when we walk through it).
2. Horseshoe players should be allowed to pee in the bushes instead of having to walk over to the clubhouse to use the washroom. (Does anyone really want to see this?)
3. Bingo players should not be allowed to take beer and wine to the games. (I'd like to know who has the booze and I'll join them).
4. People should be allowed to bring their dogs to the clubhouse and tie them up outside the door. (Some people are frightened of dogs and, also, what if everyone did it...dogfights?)
I thought of writing a retaliatory letter and posting it on the bulletin board but that would only start a gang war so I get it out of my system by posting it on my blog.
This lady is actually quite nice but she is a hard core smoker with a cough that makes her sound one foot from the grave. I know it's only the addiction talking so I'll forgive her and like her anyway. But, please, no peeing in the bushes!
This is what she wants:
1. Smokers should be able to smoke in the parking lot leading into the clubhouse. (It still stinks when we walk through it).
2. Horseshoe players should be allowed to pee in the bushes instead of having to walk over to the clubhouse to use the washroom. (Does anyone really want to see this?)
3. Bingo players should not be allowed to take beer and wine to the games. (I'd like to know who has the booze and I'll join them).
4. People should be allowed to bring their dogs to the clubhouse and tie them up outside the door. (Some people are frightened of dogs and, also, what if everyone did it...dogfights?)
I thought of writing a retaliatory letter and posting it on the bulletin board but that would only start a gang war so I get it out of my system by posting it on my blog.
This lady is actually quite nice but she is a hard core smoker with a cough that makes her sound one foot from the grave. I know it's only the addiction talking so I'll forgive her and like her anyway. But, please, no peeing in the bushes!
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