My sister-in-law, Faye, left for home today and I can't believe how boring it is here without her. Granted, she pops in for coffee every morning and I spend most of every day with her but I thought I had a busy life beyond her. I've got lots of friends here but most have also left for home and the ones that are still here aren't my closest buddies. I'm feeling a little lonely.
I thought for a brief moment of heading home around Wednesday instead of next Friday/Saturday but I don't dare. The man who started redoing my basement last August has finally resumed work after 6 months stoppage (I wasn't there so he didn't think he had to be, either) and apparently moved crap up to my livingroom. I don't want to go home to a mess. If I wait to leave on Friday and threaten him with his life I might have a chance of walking into a house as neat as I left it. I'm sort of stuck here for a whole week...without Faye.
One of my closer buddies lives right across the road from me here but she's an inside person and I hate to be indoors when the weather is nice. The park has emptied considerably so I don't get the walk by company that I normally do, either. One good thing is that I can play on the computer for hours without people storming in and telling me to get the hell off and go with them to whatever we had planned. We must always look on the upside.
This is a way of life I only have in this Florida trailer park. At home the pace is ever so much slower and I spend more time on the computer. My family comes by occasionally and so do my neighbors but it isn't an everyday/all day thing like it is here. I still see Faye about 2-3 times a week, though. No wonder I'm lost without her today!
Oh well, I can console myself with constantly checking on the site meter I attached to my blogs. I had been thrilled to discover they were being read in China but I've since found out that they're also being read in Spain and Turkey!! I'm utterly amazed. How the heck did they find me?
Friday, April 06, 2007
Thursday, April 05, 2007
The Problem Family Member
Every family has at least one member who makes everyone want to scream in frustration. Mine is my beloved grandson, Chooch. Chooch has never been able to get his life on track and yet he's the most lovable young man in the world.
In grade school, he spent more time being suspended than any other child in the school. It was never for anything terribly serious. He spit out the window; he wouldn't stop talking; he pushed another child. The school autohorities hounded my daughter to put Chooch on Ritalin because he obviously was afflicted with ADD (or ADHD). We, as a family, were adamant that he shouldn't be put on drugs and, after being psychologically evaluated at my daughter's expense, Chooch was found to not have ADD. Just think what harm could have been done to this child if we'd caved in to the school authorities. His mother always felt that what he suffered from was BRAT, anyway.
Chooch's grades were terrible even though he was always very bright. He couldn't concentrate or stay still long enough to learn anything from books and yet he was seldom kept back a grade in school. At 15 he entered high school, barely able to read and totally unable to function without constant supervision. Teachers are in short order in high school and couldn't devote enough time to him alone so he finally just dropped out. My daughter, poor soul, had struggled with being a working single mother and desperately trying to help Chooch with his homework but to no avail. His frustration level was too high and her physical and emotional strength not strong enough.
Chooch eventually moved out on his own and supported himself with various low paid jobs. At each new job he was welcomed with open arms because he's so friendly, good natured, and works hard. Before too long he'd get bored and start skipping work or fool around until he broke something on the job. He seems to live for the day and not worry about tomorrow so he doesn't realize how his actions affect the rest of his life.
Then there are his friends. He has one wonderful friend who has stuck by him since grade school and tries hard to steer Chooch the right way. But Chooch is just too friendly and generous with anyone who is nice to him and he seems to attract a lot of users.
Chooch recently found a full time job in a restaurant and his brother was managing his paycheck for him. Things were going relatively well. Yesterday his apartment building was declared in imminent danger of collapsing and everyone was evacuated, unable to return for clothes or furniture. He is currently staying with his brother and wondering when I'll be home. Oh oh!!
In grade school, he spent more time being suspended than any other child in the school. It was never for anything terribly serious. He spit out the window; he wouldn't stop talking; he pushed another child. The school autohorities hounded my daughter to put Chooch on Ritalin because he obviously was afflicted with ADD (or ADHD). We, as a family, were adamant that he shouldn't be put on drugs and, after being psychologically evaluated at my daughter's expense, Chooch was found to not have ADD. Just think what harm could have been done to this child if we'd caved in to the school authorities. His mother always felt that what he suffered from was BRAT, anyway.
Chooch's grades were terrible even though he was always very bright. He couldn't concentrate or stay still long enough to learn anything from books and yet he was seldom kept back a grade in school. At 15 he entered high school, barely able to read and totally unable to function without constant supervision. Teachers are in short order in high school and couldn't devote enough time to him alone so he finally just dropped out. My daughter, poor soul, had struggled with being a working single mother and desperately trying to help Chooch with his homework but to no avail. His frustration level was too high and her physical and emotional strength not strong enough.
Chooch eventually moved out on his own and supported himself with various low paid jobs. At each new job he was welcomed with open arms because he's so friendly, good natured, and works hard. Before too long he'd get bored and start skipping work or fool around until he broke something on the job. He seems to live for the day and not worry about tomorrow so he doesn't realize how his actions affect the rest of his life.
Then there are his friends. He has one wonderful friend who has stuck by him since grade school and tries hard to steer Chooch the right way. But Chooch is just too friendly and generous with anyone who is nice to him and he seems to attract a lot of users.
Chooch recently found a full time job in a restaurant and his brother was managing his paycheck for him. Things were going relatively well. Yesterday his apartment building was declared in imminent danger of collapsing and everyone was evacuated, unable to return for clothes or furniture. He is currently staying with his brother and wondering when I'll be home. Oh oh!!
Wednesday, April 04, 2007
I'm My Worst Critic (maybe)
The story I'm writing is coming along not so bad but every time I read it I find considerable fault with it. If it was written on paper I'd have erased a hole in it already. I started writing this story with loads of confidence that it might not be spectacular but it would be pleasant reading...but it really isn't. My story line is good but the sentences just sound flat. Nobody talks the way I'm writing.
I've enjoyed writing the blogs because they fly out of my fingers onto the keyboard like conversations. I certainly don't do much editing...maybe a few spelling corrections. This is the way I like to write, casual and down to earth. I wish my story writing was as easy.
At home I have quite a few children's stories written but I've been too afraid to show them to anyone. If no-one reads them and laughs at them then I can convince myself that there's still hope for me. All my life I've thought that inside of me was a talented writer just waiting to spring out and astound the world.
Maybe I'll never write a decent story but I still have the dream.
I've enjoyed writing the blogs because they fly out of my fingers onto the keyboard like conversations. I certainly don't do much editing...maybe a few spelling corrections. This is the way I like to write, casual and down to earth. I wish my story writing was as easy.
At home I have quite a few children's stories written but I've been too afraid to show them to anyone. If no-one reads them and laughs at them then I can convince myself that there's still hope for me. All my life I've thought that inside of me was a talented writer just waiting to spring out and astound the world.
Maybe I'll never write a decent story but I still have the dream.
My Visit to China/Taiwan
In 1989 my husband had to go to China on business and his boss, his brother, allowed him to take me with him. It was such a magnificent opportunity and I've always thought of it as the trip of a lifetime.
We flew to Vancouver, then to Shanghai, and then arrived in Beijing late at night. The flight had taken 19 hours if I remember correctly. Dennis' contact met us at the airport and arranged for the taxi to the Beijing Hotel. I remember thinking it was like a dream to enter that fabulous old hotel, especially since there were no lights on outside and only faint lights inside. They wisely conserve power at night.
One of my favorite memories is of the lovely crocheted doilies that sat on the backs of the chairs, even in the lobby. It all seemed so quaint and from another age.
Dennis spent most of his days with businessmen so I was free to roam around the area. I felt very safe but my colorful clothing and caucasian face brought many curious stares. The Chinese people at that time seemed to wear nothing but blue or brown, even the children. Occasionally someone would politely approach me and test their knowledge of English.
I walked through Tianamin (spelling?) Square and saw far off in one corner a Kentucky Fried Chicken restaurant...American influx of businesses was just starting at that time. I also toured the Forbidden Palace which was one of the the highlights of my trip. When you entered the Forbidden City, you were given headphones which directed you on the tour in the language of your choice. The headphones could be stopped or started when you reached the described area. The Forbidden City is massive and so full of history and culture. In the gift shop I purchased a few water color paintings that I'll always treasure.
Much of the time we were in China we had an English speaking interpreter along with us. Our little lady took me shopping and tried to convince me to buy a beautiful sculptured wooden vase that I turned my nose up at. Instead I bought 2 porcelain vases covered in appliqued flowers and vines. In later years I discovered that the sculptured vase would have accelerated in value while the porcelain vases became a common sight in stores back in Canada. I have no class.
Our guide took us on a tour to the Great Wall of China. I can't describe how thrilling it was to walk along this famous wall. The part we walked on seemed to be all steps, though...going up. It wasn't long before my legs began to weaken. Not long after we started our trek we passed a Coca Cola stand and I remember thinking it was out of place on the Wall. About 1/2 hour later I would have killed for a nice cold Coke.
At one point I was looking through the viewfinder of my camera and I saw a spectacular sight. Dennis was surrounded by soldiers while our little guide was jumping up and down screaming her head off. Chinese visitors on the wall were also surrounding the whole group yelling at the soldiers. Dennis just stood there with a cigarette in hand and looking completely befuddled. Apparently we'd not seen a "no smoking" sign posted because the wall is a national monument. Dennis was a hard core smoker and he was outside so therefore he smoked. Not on the Great Wall, though! He was fined the equivalent of $3.00 Cdn. Our angry guide and bystanders weren't able to convince the soldiers that they should give the Canadian visitor a break. To be fined on the Great Wall of China...what a story!
One of our side trips in China was south of Beijing. I don't remember the name of the city but it's basic fuel was coal and every outside surface...window sills, etc. was covered in a film of coal dust. A common sight on the street was face masks worn by the citizens to preserve their lungs.
We travelled by train from city to city and the countryside was beautiful. The scenery wasn't like the Canadian or U.S. but had a unique quality of it's own that seemed older somehow. As though it had existed long before America. That sounds silly but that's how it looked to me.
The trains were also an experience. The backs of the seats were graced with those lovely doilies and many passengers had brought along glass jars. Soon a lady came along and poured boiling water into each of the jars. Apparently the passengers brought their own tea, too. How simple and economic! We Canadians and Americans are definitely spoiled but we pay a high price for it.
The last leg of our trip was to Taiwan. It was very different from China, very crowded and cosmopolitan in comparison. Dennis, being frugal (for a better word), decided the hotel we were booked into was too expensive ($120 per night)so he moved us to another hotel ($95 per night)with a room so small there was barely room for the bed. The compressors for the hotel were right outside our window and ran 24 hours a day. We argued. He won. I became unfriendly.
One day I decided to take a walk around the neighborhood but the street signs were all in Chinese. It didn't take long for me to get lost even though I'd counted the blocks...I have no sense of direction. I hailed a taxi which took me up 1/2 a block and over 1/2 block to my hotel. The taxi driver must have thought I was one lazy north american!
Overall, my memories of this wondrous trip fill me with amazement at times. Did I really visit China? Did I really walk on the Great Wall? How fortunate I was to have this experience in my lifetime.
We flew to Vancouver, then to Shanghai, and then arrived in Beijing late at night. The flight had taken 19 hours if I remember correctly. Dennis' contact met us at the airport and arranged for the taxi to the Beijing Hotel. I remember thinking it was like a dream to enter that fabulous old hotel, especially since there were no lights on outside and only faint lights inside. They wisely conserve power at night.
One of my favorite memories is of the lovely crocheted doilies that sat on the backs of the chairs, even in the lobby. It all seemed so quaint and from another age.
Dennis spent most of his days with businessmen so I was free to roam around the area. I felt very safe but my colorful clothing and caucasian face brought many curious stares. The Chinese people at that time seemed to wear nothing but blue or brown, even the children. Occasionally someone would politely approach me and test their knowledge of English.
I walked through Tianamin (spelling?) Square and saw far off in one corner a Kentucky Fried Chicken restaurant...American influx of businesses was just starting at that time. I also toured the Forbidden Palace which was one of the the highlights of my trip. When you entered the Forbidden City, you were given headphones which directed you on the tour in the language of your choice. The headphones could be stopped or started when you reached the described area. The Forbidden City is massive and so full of history and culture. In the gift shop I purchased a few water color paintings that I'll always treasure.
Much of the time we were in China we had an English speaking interpreter along with us. Our little lady took me shopping and tried to convince me to buy a beautiful sculptured wooden vase that I turned my nose up at. Instead I bought 2 porcelain vases covered in appliqued flowers and vines. In later years I discovered that the sculptured vase would have accelerated in value while the porcelain vases became a common sight in stores back in Canada. I have no class.
Our guide took us on a tour to the Great Wall of China. I can't describe how thrilling it was to walk along this famous wall. The part we walked on seemed to be all steps, though...going up. It wasn't long before my legs began to weaken. Not long after we started our trek we passed a Coca Cola stand and I remember thinking it was out of place on the Wall. About 1/2 hour later I would have killed for a nice cold Coke.
At one point I was looking through the viewfinder of my camera and I saw a spectacular sight. Dennis was surrounded by soldiers while our little guide was jumping up and down screaming her head off. Chinese visitors on the wall were also surrounding the whole group yelling at the soldiers. Dennis just stood there with a cigarette in hand and looking completely befuddled. Apparently we'd not seen a "no smoking" sign posted because the wall is a national monument. Dennis was a hard core smoker and he was outside so therefore he smoked. Not on the Great Wall, though! He was fined the equivalent of $3.00 Cdn. Our angry guide and bystanders weren't able to convince the soldiers that they should give the Canadian visitor a break. To be fined on the Great Wall of China...what a story!
One of our side trips in China was south of Beijing. I don't remember the name of the city but it's basic fuel was coal and every outside surface...window sills, etc. was covered in a film of coal dust. A common sight on the street was face masks worn by the citizens to preserve their lungs.
We travelled by train from city to city and the countryside was beautiful. The scenery wasn't like the Canadian or U.S. but had a unique quality of it's own that seemed older somehow. As though it had existed long before America. That sounds silly but that's how it looked to me.
The trains were also an experience. The backs of the seats were graced with those lovely doilies and many passengers had brought along glass jars. Soon a lady came along and poured boiling water into each of the jars. Apparently the passengers brought their own tea, too. How simple and economic! We Canadians and Americans are definitely spoiled but we pay a high price for it.
The last leg of our trip was to Taiwan. It was very different from China, very crowded and cosmopolitan in comparison. Dennis, being frugal (for a better word), decided the hotel we were booked into was too expensive ($120 per night)so he moved us to another hotel ($95 per night)with a room so small there was barely room for the bed. The compressors for the hotel were right outside our window and ran 24 hours a day. We argued. He won. I became unfriendly.
One day I decided to take a walk around the neighborhood but the street signs were all in Chinese. It didn't take long for me to get lost even though I'd counted the blocks...I have no sense of direction. I hailed a taxi which took me up 1/2 a block and over 1/2 block to my hotel. The taxi driver must have thought I was one lazy north american!
Overall, my memories of this wondrous trip fill me with amazement at times. Did I really visit China? Did I really walk on the Great Wall? How fortunate I was to have this experience in my lifetime.
Tuesday, April 03, 2007
I Am Read In China
Once I got my site meter in place I started to delve into all it would show me about who was reading my blogs. Lo and behold, over the last 4-5 hours about 1/3 of visitors to my blog site were from China. I am so impressed! And flattered!! It would be nice if more of the people who read my blogs would leave a comment. I'd love to know what they think of the subjects I choose to write about.
This is such a pleasurable outlet for someone like me who loves to write but doesn't fool herself that she's a real "writer". Anyway, getting the site meter installed will just make blogging more interesting for me.
Write back sometime, okay??
This is such a pleasurable outlet for someone like me who loves to write but doesn't fool herself that she's a real "writer". Anyway, getting the site meter installed will just make blogging more interesting for me.
Write back sometime, okay??
Site Meter
How can I explain the problems I've had trying to insert a site meter on my blogs? I tried a few times in the past year and couldn't figure out what Site Meter was telling me to do so I just kept cancelling it. This last attempt sent me to the Blogger help section where I threw myself on the mercy of anyone willing to take the time to explain to me, in "infant" language, how to do it. A very nice person answered my request quickly but apparently didn't believe I'm as dumb as I am and explained the process as though directing the explanation to a 10 year old. I'm not that good! Then I got the bright idea to go into the help section of Site Meter and follow the directions. Simple, you say? Nooooo!
I was smart enough to print out a few directions but I haven't a clue where I got them...I've been struggling with this supposed simple task for too long. These directions were almost down to my level but I was able to follow them okay. I was told to go onto the "layout" or "template" link on my blog. Whoopee! I found it!!
Then I was told I'd be on the "add and arrange page element". Sure enough, there it was. Now I was getting excited. Next I was told to click on the "add on" link. There was none. Unbelievably, I'd gotten this far and my damn page had no "add on" link. I searched around a bit but finally gave up and almost cancelled the Site Meter once again.
Today I had finished writing my blog and decided, just for the heck of it, to look at the layout page again. The "ad on" link was there!! Suddenly it disappeared again and I was furious. If I was the paranoid type I would have thought that Blogger.com was playing tricks with this poor old lady. I went in and out of the site and couldn't get that link back. So I went out to lunch.
Just now I tried again and the link was there. I did a few odd things (not sure what) and was finally able to put Site Meter on my blog site. I'm not sure but I think it might only be on the last blog I wrote, though. Guess I'll find out soon.
P.S. I just published this blog and the site meter was there. I am so happy!
P.P.S. I just checked my older blogs and the site meter is on them also. I'm so happy I could spit.
I was smart enough to print out a few directions but I haven't a clue where I got them...I've been struggling with this supposed simple task for too long. These directions were almost down to my level but I was able to follow them okay. I was told to go onto the "layout" or "template" link on my blog. Whoopee! I found it!!
Then I was told I'd be on the "add and arrange page element". Sure enough, there it was. Now I was getting excited. Next I was told to click on the "add on" link. There was none. Unbelievably, I'd gotten this far and my damn page had no "add on" link. I searched around a bit but finally gave up and almost cancelled the Site Meter once again.
Today I had finished writing my blog and decided, just for the heck of it, to look at the layout page again. The "ad on" link was there!! Suddenly it disappeared again and I was furious. If I was the paranoid type I would have thought that Blogger.com was playing tricks with this poor old lady. I went in and out of the site and couldn't get that link back. So I went out to lunch.
Just now I tried again and the link was there. I did a few odd things (not sure what) and was finally able to put Site Meter on my blog site. I'm not sure but I think it might only be on the last blog I wrote, though. Guess I'll find out soon.
P.S. I just published this blog and the site meter was there. I am so happy!
P.P.S. I just checked my older blogs and the site meter is on them also. I'm so happy I could spit.
Spousal Abuse
There is a couple here who have made the winter miserable for their neighbors. The couple are serious alcoholics and possibly druggies. Way too often the man will beat the woman up and the police are called. Even more often there are public arguments raging between the two combatants which move into the street and disturb or frighten the seniors living nearby. After every altercation the woman returns to her abuser within a day.
I don't know these people because the man works and the woman stays inside her trailer all day. They don't associate with the rest of us and, to be honest, most of us are not interested in forming any kind of friendship with them. But we worry that one day he'll kill her.
Police and psychologists know that the percentage of women who repeatedly return to their abusers is very high. It's been written that the women have had their pride and self-esteem beaten out of them. Deep down they must know their man will never change but they must have hope that they'll survive in the long run.
There are many women who feel that living without a man is impossible. But I have met many women who, like me, are very happy to be on their own and with no intention of ever bringing a man into their lives again. Women really are becoming stronger and less dependent on men to provide for them. I've always stressed to my daughters and granddaughters that they should pursue careers that will support them in the event that their husbands or future husbands fall by the wayside. They have been taught to have respect for themselves and never suffer abuse from anyone. There is nothing sadder than an abused woman who is totally dependant on her abuser.
The only hope I see to eradicate the problem is to preach self-respect to children and teach them the difference between self-respect and selfishness. If we truly understand that every human being, even ourselves, has the right to love and kindness, then we won't accept anything less. If parents can't be relied upon to spread the word then the job falls upon the school teachers.
I'm very proud of the strong women in my family and the strong men they've chosen as mates.
I don't know these people because the man works and the woman stays inside her trailer all day. They don't associate with the rest of us and, to be honest, most of us are not interested in forming any kind of friendship with them. But we worry that one day he'll kill her.
Police and psychologists know that the percentage of women who repeatedly return to their abusers is very high. It's been written that the women have had their pride and self-esteem beaten out of them. Deep down they must know their man will never change but they must have hope that they'll survive in the long run.
There are many women who feel that living without a man is impossible. But I have met many women who, like me, are very happy to be on their own and with no intention of ever bringing a man into their lives again. Women really are becoming stronger and less dependent on men to provide for them. I've always stressed to my daughters and granddaughters that they should pursue careers that will support them in the event that their husbands or future husbands fall by the wayside. They have been taught to have respect for themselves and never suffer abuse from anyone. There is nothing sadder than an abused woman who is totally dependant on her abuser.
The only hope I see to eradicate the problem is to preach self-respect to children and teach them the difference between self-respect and selfishness. If we truly understand that every human being, even ourselves, has the right to love and kindness, then we won't accept anything less. If parents can't be relied upon to spread the word then the job falls upon the school teachers.
I'm very proud of the strong women in my family and the strong men they've chosen as mates.
Sunday, April 01, 2007
Just a Moment
I had a rare day to myself today and used part of the morning to amble around the flea market. Half of the stalls were closed for the summer...Florida would be lost without the snowbirds...but I did manage to buy an old set of salt and pepper shakers for $1.
I left the flea market and drove up to Ross' hoping they'd gotten some new bathing suits in but they hadn't so I moved on to Beall's. Beall's is by far my favorite store and I think it can only be found in Florida. Whoever does their buying for them knows how a visitor to the south wants to dress...the fabric colors and patterns are bright, light, and scrumptious. Both quality and price are good, too. Because I was by myself I could spend all the time I wanted just browsing but I finally bought a terrific Alia shirt that was 40% off.
When I finished shopping it was close to 1 P.M. so I drove to a nearby Red Lobster for lunch. My waiter, who could have been my son-in-law's (David) twin, moaned loudly "Are you all by yourself???". Why do people think it's sad to eat alone? Sometimes it's pleasant and that's how it was today.
I placed my order and then sat quietly observing the diners around me. Very close was a dear little family of Mom, Dad, and three little girls. The youngest girl had pushed her chair right up against her father's and, the whole time I was there, demanded his full attention. She chattered away to him in Spanish and occasionally had to recapture his attention by calling "Poppy!".
What impressed me was his calm exterior. He never chastised her or acted as though he resented the fact that his other children weren't getting their fair share of him...not to mention his wife. My guess is that he might possibly be a soldier who had been away for a while and the little girl just couldn't get enough of him. Her mother noticed me watching and smiled at me. I'm glad she understood I wasn't being critical but was just enjoying the family's dynamics.
Jason, my waiter, brought my lunch of deep fried flounder (I'd asked for broiled), mashed potatoes (notice, no fries), salad, and those unbelievably tasty cheese buscuits.
Pretty darned nice day out by myself!
I left the flea market and drove up to Ross' hoping they'd gotten some new bathing suits in but they hadn't so I moved on to Beall's. Beall's is by far my favorite store and I think it can only be found in Florida. Whoever does their buying for them knows how a visitor to the south wants to dress...the fabric colors and patterns are bright, light, and scrumptious. Both quality and price are good, too. Because I was by myself I could spend all the time I wanted just browsing but I finally bought a terrific Alia shirt that was 40% off.
When I finished shopping it was close to 1 P.M. so I drove to a nearby Red Lobster for lunch. My waiter, who could have been my son-in-law's (David) twin, moaned loudly "Are you all by yourself???". Why do people think it's sad to eat alone? Sometimes it's pleasant and that's how it was today.
I placed my order and then sat quietly observing the diners around me. Very close was a dear little family of Mom, Dad, and three little girls. The youngest girl had pushed her chair right up against her father's and, the whole time I was there, demanded his full attention. She chattered away to him in Spanish and occasionally had to recapture his attention by calling "Poppy!".
What impressed me was his calm exterior. He never chastised her or acted as though he resented the fact that his other children weren't getting their fair share of him...not to mention his wife. My guess is that he might possibly be a soldier who had been away for a while and the little girl just couldn't get enough of him. Her mother noticed me watching and smiled at me. I'm glad she understood I wasn't being critical but was just enjoying the family's dynamics.
Jason, my waiter, brought my lunch of deep fried flounder (I'd asked for broiled), mashed potatoes (notice, no fries), salad, and those unbelievably tasty cheese buscuits.
Pretty darned nice day out by myself!
Eating/Drinking One's Self to Death
Think it can't be done? Well, one of our residents here seems to be making a valiant attempt to do just that. In this park we have more opportunities to overeat than most other places on earth. We have regular potlucks which is nothing more than a monstrous buffet. We have hamburger dinners every 2 weeks and luncheons every Tuesday. We have donuts and coffee in the clubhouse every Saturday and even the occasional full breakfast. Then, of course, there was the cruise where food reigned 24 hours a day. There are also countless groups of people heading out to eat meals at restaurants every day.
The resident mentioned is a very nice man who loves (or lives) to eat. It's been noticed that he eats extremely large portions at every function and then even brags about the enormous quantities he consumes daily. He was a heart attack waiting to happen. He was taken to the hospital yesterday with a racing heartbeat and the doctors are keeping him in intensive care while they complete their tests. It all really makes me wonder why we abuse our bodies so badly.
A lady stopped by for a surprise visit yesterday and somehow we got onto the topic of drinking too much booze. She is a lovely, well put-together lady who no-one (not even me) would ever know is a very heavy drinker. During our conversation she confessed that she drinks 8-9 alcoholic beverages every day...and does so because she has to. But she emphasized that she isn't an alcoholic. Because we don't know each other very well, I think she was using me as a sounding board. I wish I'd had the strength to advise her to get help with her problem but I didn't. It wasn't the right time, I guess.
I'm still on my potato chip/french fry free diet. This is my feeble attempt to make myself a bit healthier and I hope it helps. I feel good but just have to look in the mirror to see how I've abused this poor old body. We all have our demons in some form and have to deal with them the best we can. Instead of turning to booze or infidelity when I had my life struggles, I turned to potato chips. Isn't that silly?
I've never advocated being a vegetarian or exercising until there isn't an ounce of fat left on your body but there has to be a happy medium. If I had it to do over again I'd be more aware of my body needs instead of taking it for granted. This old body is the only thing we have to get us around and we might be able to replace a few worn out parts but the chassis is with us for life.
The resident mentioned is a very nice man who loves (or lives) to eat. It's been noticed that he eats extremely large portions at every function and then even brags about the enormous quantities he consumes daily. He was a heart attack waiting to happen. He was taken to the hospital yesterday with a racing heartbeat and the doctors are keeping him in intensive care while they complete their tests. It all really makes me wonder why we abuse our bodies so badly.
A lady stopped by for a surprise visit yesterday and somehow we got onto the topic of drinking too much booze. She is a lovely, well put-together lady who no-one (not even me) would ever know is a very heavy drinker. During our conversation she confessed that she drinks 8-9 alcoholic beverages every day...and does so because she has to. But she emphasized that she isn't an alcoholic. Because we don't know each other very well, I think she was using me as a sounding board. I wish I'd had the strength to advise her to get help with her problem but I didn't. It wasn't the right time, I guess.
I'm still on my potato chip/french fry free diet. This is my feeble attempt to make myself a bit healthier and I hope it helps. I feel good but just have to look in the mirror to see how I've abused this poor old body. We all have our demons in some form and have to deal with them the best we can. Instead of turning to booze or infidelity when I had my life struggles, I turned to potato chips. Isn't that silly?
I've never advocated being a vegetarian or exercising until there isn't an ounce of fat left on your body but there has to be a happy medium. If I had it to do over again I'd be more aware of my body needs instead of taking it for granted. This old body is the only thing we have to get us around and we might be able to replace a few worn out parts but the chassis is with us for life.
Saturday, March 31, 2007
Losing Words
Most of us, as we grow older, begin to have brain farts. We'll be chattering away when, all of a sudden, the word we want won't come to mind. I've been having these brain farts for years and adjusted to replacing the word I wanted with another one. It's sort of funny because when we replace a word we often take a step up in our vocabulary and, in doing so, sound rather uppity.
With all the talk about senility and Alzeimers in seniors, we can become a bit nervous when we forget anything. But most of the time we're able to laugh it off. Last summer there were 5 of us older ladies having lunch and one was telling an interesting story. She stopped suddenly, forgetting the next word and looked to the lady on her right for help. That lady, in turn, looked to her right for help. This went around the table until the look landed back on the original lady. We sat there laughing like teenagers.
I love writing on the computer because I can substitute a word when the one I want has escaped me and then insert it later if and when it comes to mind. When I consider how much I learn with every new day, the amount I forget doesn't compare. I think I'm still ahead of the game!
With all the talk about senility and Alzeimers in seniors, we can become a bit nervous when we forget anything. But most of the time we're able to laugh it off. Last summer there were 5 of us older ladies having lunch and one was telling an interesting story. She stopped suddenly, forgetting the next word and looked to the lady on her right for help. That lady, in turn, looked to her right for help. This went around the table until the look landed back on the original lady. We sat there laughing like teenagers.
I love writing on the computer because I can substitute a word when the one I want has escaped me and then insert it later if and when it comes to mind. When I consider how much I learn with every new day, the amount I forget doesn't compare. I think I'm still ahead of the game!
Friday, March 30, 2007
Death of a Lizard
The other night I walked through the bathroom to my bedroom and spotted a streak of black practically fly from one side of the room to the other (the bathroom is possibly 6' wide). It moved so fast I couldn't tell what it was...I was also screeching like a banshee...and just assumed it was a cockroach. Madder than hell that a cockroach had found it's way inside my trailer I pulled out a can of Raid and sprayed all over the little bathroom, unable to see the intruder but bound it wasn't going to escape into another room.
Raid isn't good for human lungs. I choked, backed into the livingroom, returned to the bathroom to spray once more, choked, etc., etc., etc.
Slowly, a tiny little lizard dragged it's poor, poisoned body from behind the sink taps and died right in front of me. Now I was not only poisoned myself but I'd killed a harmless little lizard. The air was rancid with the smell of Raid and I didn't want to handle the lizard. I decided to just close the door and go to bed.
The next morning I disposed of the lizard and aired out the house. All is well!
Raid isn't good for human lungs. I choked, backed into the livingroom, returned to the bathroom to spray once more, choked, etc., etc., etc.
Slowly, a tiny little lizard dragged it's poor, poisoned body from behind the sink taps and died right in front of me. Now I was not only poisoned myself but I'd killed a harmless little lizard. The air was rancid with the smell of Raid and I didn't want to handle the lizard. I decided to just close the door and go to bed.
The next morning I disposed of the lizard and aired out the house. All is well!
Writing a Story
I've decided to write a story and have been busy getting it started. I've spent my winters in this senior park since 1998 and have been amazed, aghast, dismayed, and titillated by true life stories which occur here. We jokingly refer to it as a senior Peyton Place. In truth, it is rich with material for many stories. The story I've started to write is a blended mixture of personalities and events, carefully concocted to disguise the true players. This will be my summer project and, when I get enough nerve to present it, it will be by blog.
In the meantime, life goes on here at the senior park and every day now someone is leaving for home. Usually I hate this time of year but I'm kind of happy it's all winding down and I can get back to Canada and all that awaits me there.
Many have left already and more will go over the next few days. By Monday, the park will be very quiet. My plan is to spend lots of time at the pool until I leave for home on April 15th. It will be rather peaceful to have mainly do-nothing days because I've been hard pressed all winter to find an empty day. I jump from one interest to another and just hate to miss out on anything going on...but that is the shape of my winters, not my summers, so I'm not going to complain about not having much empty time.
I'm sending a load of stuff home with a couple who live near me in Canada. My own car trunk is full and I still have a fair amount of stuff to pack in the back seat. How do I manage to do this every year? Yesterday I bought a computer monitor which is in a fair sized box which will take up a lot of the back seat. Now I'm getting worried...but what's new? I really must try to cut back next year.
In the meantime, life goes on here at the senior park and every day now someone is leaving for home. Usually I hate this time of year but I'm kind of happy it's all winding down and I can get back to Canada and all that awaits me there.
Many have left already and more will go over the next few days. By Monday, the park will be very quiet. My plan is to spend lots of time at the pool until I leave for home on April 15th. It will be rather peaceful to have mainly do-nothing days because I've been hard pressed all winter to find an empty day. I jump from one interest to another and just hate to miss out on anything going on...but that is the shape of my winters, not my summers, so I'm not going to complain about not having much empty time.
I'm sending a load of stuff home with a couple who live near me in Canada. My own car trunk is full and I still have a fair amount of stuff to pack in the back seat. How do I manage to do this every year? Yesterday I bought a computer monitor which is in a fair sized box which will take up a lot of the back seat. Now I'm getting worried...but what's new? I really must try to cut back next year.
Thursday, March 29, 2007
Cute Story
My neighbor was pushing a little girl on a swing and asked her how old she was. The little girl said "stop the swing!" Ron thought something was wrong so he quickly brought the swing to a stop. The little girl let go of one swing rope and held up her hand showing 3 fingers.
Now, isn't that a cute story?
Now, isn't that a cute story?
Wednesday, March 28, 2007
What Americans Know About Canada
When I come to Florida for the winter I almost feel like I'm at home. At least half of my friends are American but we don't differentiate here. If you like someone they can be from Mars and they'd still be friends. But...every once in a while we Canadians discover how very little some Americans know about Canada.
The other day I went up to the pool early and got into conversation with a lady I'd never met before. I don't know if she spends the winter here or is just in for a short time. In any case, we started talking and she asked me where I was from. I told her "Ontario in Canada". She replied "I'm always amazed at how well you people speak English". What the hell????
I then told her she might be thinking of Quebec and that really threw her because she'd never heard of Quebec. I wonder if she knows there are even more countries in the world outside the U.S.A.?
The other day I went up to the pool early and got into conversation with a lady I'd never met before. I don't know if she spends the winter here or is just in for a short time. In any case, we started talking and she asked me where I was from. I told her "Ontario in Canada". She replied "I'm always amazed at how well you people speak English". What the hell????
I then told her she might be thinking of Quebec and that really threw her because she'd never heard of Quebec. I wonder if she knows there are even more countries in the world outside the U.S.A.?
Tuesday, March 27, 2007
A Sad Day
One of our friends passed away unexpectedly yesterday and tears flowed all over the park. We care for each other here and no passing goes unnoticed.
The widow was understandably beside herself with grief but was surrounded by caring friends from the beginning. We sheltered her as best we could, giving her a shoulder to cry on. One lady notified their relatives at home and then contacted the insurance company who would make travel arrangements to take the deceased and his wife back home to Canada.
I watched in admiration as the widow took control of herself over the span of a few hours and gained inner strength to carry her through the ordeal still to come. This couple had been married for 54 years, had 4 children, and were fortunate enough to keep their marriage a happy one. It will be very difficult for this lady to be on her own without her precious spouse beside her...but she will survive. She will be strong for her children and her grandchildren. She will be strong because she has to be.
There were brief moments yesterday when she even laughed a bit, remembering the good times they'd had over the years. We let her talk at length about their life together because that will help her heal. Occasionally a tear would fall but she'd drag herself right back to the task at hand...getting through it. Her daughter flew in last night so now we who are just friends can take a step back and let mother and daughter gain strength from each other. This is all part of the healing process and there are still miles to go.
The widow was understandably beside herself with grief but was surrounded by caring friends from the beginning. We sheltered her as best we could, giving her a shoulder to cry on. One lady notified their relatives at home and then contacted the insurance company who would make travel arrangements to take the deceased and his wife back home to Canada.
I watched in admiration as the widow took control of herself over the span of a few hours and gained inner strength to carry her through the ordeal still to come. This couple had been married for 54 years, had 4 children, and were fortunate enough to keep their marriage a happy one. It will be very difficult for this lady to be on her own without her precious spouse beside her...but she will survive. She will be strong for her children and her grandchildren. She will be strong because she has to be.
There were brief moments yesterday when she even laughed a bit, remembering the good times they'd had over the years. We let her talk at length about their life together because that will help her heal. Occasionally a tear would fall but she'd drag herself right back to the task at hand...getting through it. Her daughter flew in last night so now we who are just friends can take a step back and let mother and daughter gain strength from each other. This is all part of the healing process and there are still miles to go.
Sunday, March 25, 2007
Inspiration
Vanessa Redgrave is currently doing a monologue on stage written about how a woman coped with the death of her husband and daughter. It got me thinking.
When my husband passed away I couldn't rid my house of all his belongings fast enough. Each item was too powerful a reminder of Dennis in his healthy days and it disturbed me deeply to see them around the house...his house.
I sent monstrous piles of clothes to my grandson's church and gave untold piles of paperwork and momentos to my children...our children.
We used a few large, framed photographs at his funeral. Some went to my children and some were supposed to remain with me. It became too difficult for me to see those pictures of him so they also were passed along to my children. His wedding ring, and mine, are in a little silk bag next to him inside the mausoleum niche where his ashes are interred.
Two articles of his clothing I kept. One was a leather jacket that eventually went to one of our grandsons...I hadn't offered it originally because I thought he might feel uncomfortable wearing it but he was thrilled when I did give it to him. The other item was Dennis' leather moccasins. I can't give them away and I can't stand to see them so they're tucked away in the back of a closet. It tears me up now thinking about those darned shoes. Somehow they've become my connection to a man I loved with all my heart at one time.
Why the shoes, I wonder?
When my husband passed away I couldn't rid my house of all his belongings fast enough. Each item was too powerful a reminder of Dennis in his healthy days and it disturbed me deeply to see them around the house...his house.
I sent monstrous piles of clothes to my grandson's church and gave untold piles of paperwork and momentos to my children...our children.
We used a few large, framed photographs at his funeral. Some went to my children and some were supposed to remain with me. It became too difficult for me to see those pictures of him so they also were passed along to my children. His wedding ring, and mine, are in a little silk bag next to him inside the mausoleum niche where his ashes are interred.
Two articles of his clothing I kept. One was a leather jacket that eventually went to one of our grandsons...I hadn't offered it originally because I thought he might feel uncomfortable wearing it but he was thrilled when I did give it to him. The other item was Dennis' leather moccasins. I can't give them away and I can't stand to see them so they're tucked away in the back of a closet. It tears me up now thinking about those darned shoes. Somehow they've become my connection to a man I loved with all my heart at one time.
Why the shoes, I wonder?
Family
A big chunk of our family back home gathered to celebrate my sister-in-law's birthday on Friday...she turned 75. Because it was most convenient, they opened up another sister-in-law's house (she's here in Florida) and had ONE of the parties there. It would have been so nice to be there but I'm rejoicing in the fact that my family is still so close and loving that they made a point of getting together for this monumental birthday.
My daughter mentioned that family get-togethers are so much more relaxed than gatherings of friends. With family you don't have to put on a front...they've seen every aspect of you already. It's also important that with family you are in a place where you belong.
When I married into my husband's family it was a real eye opener. They were everything that a family should be...close, caring, and supportive. They gathered me in, as they do with every newcomer to the family, and I consider them no different than brothers and sisters to me. My children were raised right along with their cousins and have remained friends to this day. What is like balm to my soul is that the following generation of children are also friends. How wonderful!
Sure, we have the odd family member we simply tolerate, but "we are family". That simple phrase has the strength of steel.
My daughter mentioned that family get-togethers are so much more relaxed than gatherings of friends. With family you don't have to put on a front...they've seen every aspect of you already. It's also important that with family you are in a place where you belong.
When I married into my husband's family it was a real eye opener. They were everything that a family should be...close, caring, and supportive. They gathered me in, as they do with every newcomer to the family, and I consider them no different than brothers and sisters to me. My children were raised right along with their cousins and have remained friends to this day. What is like balm to my soul is that the following generation of children are also friends. How wonderful!
Sure, we have the odd family member we simply tolerate, but "we are family". That simple phrase has the strength of steel.
Saturday, March 24, 2007
I Gave Up Fries
Never have I been able to diet without severe hunger and misery defeating my attempts. One of the tricks to losing weight is to only give up one item that is bad for you. I gave up potato chips as my 2007 new year's resolution and haven't had any cravings. I was going to give up french fries for my 2008 new year's resolution but decided to start early. It's been a week and so far so good.
I normally eat a fairly healthy diet but I crave salt...sprinkled on potato chips and fries. Since giving up the chips I haven't noticed any difference in my weight so maybe I've just been eating more fries to compensate. It will be interesting to see what happens with both the chips and fries out of my life. I'll let you know!
I normally eat a fairly healthy diet but I crave salt...sprinkled on potato chips and fries. Since giving up the chips I haven't noticed any difference in my weight so maybe I've just been eating more fries to compensate. It will be interesting to see what happens with both the chips and fries out of my life. I'll let you know!
Pool Day
We spent a lot of time at the pool today. No-body swims, though, but just floats around in conversation groups. If you looked into our pool on a busy day you'd see a half dozen groupings of seniors floating around on noodles. The noodles are colorful and so are our swimsuits so it looks kind of pretty.
Some of us played "Farkle" in between pool dips. It's a dice game that we also play over in the clubhouse. Almost everyone has a nice, healthy tan except me. I look as though I just arrived...well, not quite but it's that cursed Irish skin!
Since I'm leaving here in three weeks, I'll spend as much time as I can at the pool. During the day it's the place to be, the place to meet friends, and the place to cool off. How lucky we are!
Some of us played "Farkle" in between pool dips. It's a dice game that we also play over in the clubhouse. Almost everyone has a nice, healthy tan except me. I look as though I just arrived...well, not quite but it's that cursed Irish skin!
Since I'm leaving here in three weeks, I'll spend as much time as I can at the pool. During the day it's the place to be, the place to meet friends, and the place to cool off. How lucky we are!
Friday, March 23, 2007
Getting By
I completed the purchase of my friend Carole's trailer this morning. We're so happy we could spit!! The lady who sold it stayed on a while and we talked about various things but one of the conversations got me thinking.
We're told that we should always have 3 months salary tucked away so that it will tide us over if our jobs disappear. I don't know anyone who has been able to do that. How many people who are paying a mortgage and raising a family can afford to set aside about $7-8000 (and up) in case of an emergency? It never happened in my household. Even today, my backup is my line of credit.
I'm told that in order to purchase a nice house these days the buyer has to take on a 50 year mortgage and sometimes can only afford to pay the interest on the loan for the rest of their lives, thereby never really owning their own home. Part of the problem lies with buying above our means but even older houses have become so costly that it's impossible for people earning minimum wage to buy one.
When my husband and I bought our 13 year old house back in 1968 it cost $19,000. Our family income at the time was probably around $10,000 a year. Today, a house in my neighborhood (almost 40 years later) is worth around $200,000. The average income is maybe $50,000 so you can see how much more difficult it is for a family to buy a house in this day and age. I honestly don't know how they do it.
For many years it has been almost necessary for a family to have two incomes in order to get by. In my family, we kept our expectations lower and managed with one regular income and me working part-time. There was never much money for luxuries but we did okay. I used to think that modern families just needed to cut back on their expenses and they'd do as well as my generation did but it's becoming more apparent that the cost of living has simply gotten too high for them to get ahead.
When my husband and I retired I told my children that we'd be spending all of their potential inheritance during our golden years. My lovely children said "go right ahead!" I'm hoping there'll be a bit left for them, though.
We're told that we should always have 3 months salary tucked away so that it will tide us over if our jobs disappear. I don't know anyone who has been able to do that. How many people who are paying a mortgage and raising a family can afford to set aside about $7-8000 (and up) in case of an emergency? It never happened in my household. Even today, my backup is my line of credit.
I'm told that in order to purchase a nice house these days the buyer has to take on a 50 year mortgage and sometimes can only afford to pay the interest on the loan for the rest of their lives, thereby never really owning their own home. Part of the problem lies with buying above our means but even older houses have become so costly that it's impossible for people earning minimum wage to buy one.
When my husband and I bought our 13 year old house back in 1968 it cost $19,000. Our family income at the time was probably around $10,000 a year. Today, a house in my neighborhood (almost 40 years later) is worth around $200,000. The average income is maybe $50,000 so you can see how much more difficult it is for a family to buy a house in this day and age. I honestly don't know how they do it.
For many years it has been almost necessary for a family to have two incomes in order to get by. In my family, we kept our expectations lower and managed with one regular income and me working part-time. There was never much money for luxuries but we did okay. I used to think that modern families just needed to cut back on their expenses and they'd do as well as my generation did but it's becoming more apparent that the cost of living has simply gotten too high for them to get ahead.
When my husband and I retired I told my children that we'd be spending all of their potential inheritance during our golden years. My lovely children said "go right ahead!" I'm hoping there'll be a bit left for them, though.
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