Dog Races and Turd Tosses

I believe old age is our reward for a mispent youth. We finally get to have all the fun we ever wanted without the need to impress the opposite sex.

On Wednesday a busload of us went to the dog races in Tampa. I'd rather bet on the dogs than go to the casino because it costs less money and the dogs are so pretty. Most of us choose our dogs by their names and then bet $2 to show. That's because most of us have no idea how to pick a winning dog. We stay for 10 races so I bet on all my races at the same time. I'm not going to learn anything new about dog racing from the time I get there until I leave so I save myself standing in line 10 times by doing it all at once. I ended up winning $12.60 of the $20 I originally bet so the day was a huge success as far as I was concerned.

After the races we went to a regular stopover where we got ice cream and strawberry concoctions and then bought a few items in their market. I forgot to mention that we started out the day by boarding the bus at 7:45 so we could get to a terrific buffet breakfast by 9:00. Most of our outings seem to revolve strongly around food.

We got back to the park by 6 P.M. and I had to race over to Bingo because I was working it. Bingo was a lot of fun last night because we ladies handling the money refused to take any winnings out to the "porch monkeys". They had to come to us for anything they won. Then they demanded hugs along with their money so we all had a lot of laughs over that. Silly stuff but happy stuff.

Thursday was the annual "Turd Toss". One of our new ladies had made up crowns for the king and queen and she even made one up for Mark (he started the whole thing). His says "Head Turd".

I've mentioned our turd toss before but here is how it works. Everyone takes their lawn chairs and lines either side of "Easy Street". Mark and Char have 2 "potties" (never used) that sit in the middle of the road. Each contestant is handed a turd (it used to be wet noodles inside a piece of pantihose but this year they were dry) and has to stand behind a predesignated line. They then attempt to toss the turd into the potty. The one who gets the most turds in the pot wins the crown. They will be celebrities in the park parade next year.

Believe it or not, I sunk the first turd for the ladies but lost out to my good friend, Sheila, who tossed in 4 out of 5. She is our new Queen Turd. Dick, one of our new park members, claimed Turd King. They were ceremoniously photographed sitting on the potties. The official turnout for our Turd Toss Day was about 100 people. Seniors do have a lot of time on their hands, don't they.

Linda, Chris, and Candy presented our Head Turd, Mark, with a kitty litter cake at the end of the contest. It's all made from food materials but set in a kitty litter pan. The kitty turds are melted tootsie rolls. He looked a little dubious when he saw it but it really was delicious.

In the evening we had our bi-monthly hamburger supper at the clubhouse and it was followed by entertainment provided by a gentleman who played the guitar and sang.

Lovely day!