We all have responsibilities in life and sometimes they demand a response that is difficult for us. Gail just got news that her brother is in serious condition back home so she's terminated her vacation time early to go home to be with him. Time with our loved ones is precious and, in times of sudden illness, we often don't get those last few hours on earth with them so haste is necessary.
It's really amazing to think how we take time for granted. We make choices to do other things rather than spend time with the ones we love because we think they'll always be there. We engage in petty spats that mar the relationships, too. In our transient society where travel far and beyond is possible, families become separated quite easily. It's not like our ancient ancestors who spent their entire lives enmeshed in the lives of their families who all lived together or close by.
The distance we've put between ourselves and our loved ones hasn't broken the familial bond, though. Families still come together, no matter the distance needed to travel, during times of trouble or happiness...marriage,birth, illness or death. Family is of utmost importance to most of us and during such times we seem to feel a strong need to be together. This is probably a primal response to knowing that there is strength in numbers.
My generation is the oldest now and we realize that our days are numbered. We carry the knowledge that we are the ones who will probably fall first and we also worry that we'll become a burden to our families. We only hope that when our time comes our families will see that we are kept comfortable and that they'll be there to see us out...not because of social mores but because it's what they feel in their hearts is the thing they want to do.
Illness and death are all a part of life. We humans were never meant to live solitary lives because we need the reassurance of being surrounded by loved ones in order to endure what life hands us. Gail is rushing home to offer her presence and love to her brother because it is what is in her heart. She knows it won't change the course of events but she also knows she will be where she is meant to be. She might not realize it now but this will give her comfort in the long run.
Life is a mystery but I've discovered over my many years that you do best when you follow your instincts. You may not understand the where or why but you'll know you've made the right decisions.
Sunday, March 18, 2012
Friday, March 16, 2012
Horrible...Horrible
I've always loved the ugly trees that surround my trailer even though they drop leathered leaves all the time and mess up the patio. One of my friends here once said he didn't like the trees because "things" could fall out of them. I chose to ignore the comment and not ask for details but the words have hung with me for many years.
Well, a nightmare happened on Wednesday night. It was still light out as another male friend was making his way through the trailer lots over to the clubhouse to play Bingo. He passed under quite a few trees along the way and something heavy fell onto his shoulder, slid down his leg and coiled up on the ground. You got it...it was a bloomin' snake!
Now, he thought it was funny but I know that if it had happened to me I would have had a massive heart attack and dropped dead on the spot. We all know that snakes abound here in the warm south but people like me try to pretend they're always far away from us. All I want is for them to stay away from me and out of sight. I don't want to see even a dead one because I know it was once alive and could have come near me if it chose to do so.
The men all tried to play macho and act as though it didn't bother them but most of us women were admittedly terrified. I don't know why we're so afraid of snakes but they scare the beejeezus out of me.
I have 2 prayers right now...one is that my car doesn't break down before it gets Shelley and me home and the other one is that I finish my winter vacation in Florida without hearing about or seeing a snake. Please and Thank You!
Well, a nightmare happened on Wednesday night. It was still light out as another male friend was making his way through the trailer lots over to the clubhouse to play Bingo. He passed under quite a few trees along the way and something heavy fell onto his shoulder, slid down his leg and coiled up on the ground. You got it...it was a bloomin' snake!
Now, he thought it was funny but I know that if it had happened to me I would have had a massive heart attack and dropped dead on the spot. We all know that snakes abound here in the warm south but people like me try to pretend they're always far away from us. All I want is for them to stay away from me and out of sight. I don't want to see even a dead one because I know it was once alive and could have come near me if it chose to do so.
The men all tried to play macho and act as though it didn't bother them but most of us women were admittedly terrified. I don't know why we're so afraid of snakes but they scare the beejeezus out of me.
I have 2 prayers right now...one is that my car doesn't break down before it gets Shelley and me home and the other one is that I finish my winter vacation in Florida without hearing about or seeing a snake. Please and Thank You!
Tuesday, March 13, 2012
I Lost Again
It's hard to believe that I've tried for about 11 years to be the Turd Queen and failed once again. I had 2 chances to dunk the turd and the closest I got was to splat one turd onto the front of the toilet, not in it.I'm getting closer to winning, though, because this year a lady named Pat is the Turd Queen, unfortunately not this Pat.
Today Is The Day
Today is Turd Toss Day, the day I've been waiting for all season. Today is the day I hope to become the Turd Toss Queen!
Every year we have Turd Toss Day and every year I fail to reach my goal...2 years ago the queen was my friend, Sheila, and last year it was my friend, Joann. Close but no cigars!
The game goes like this...2 toilets are placed in the middle of the street about 30 (?) feet apart and each contestant is given a turd made out of pantyhose filled with wet speghetti. Each contestant stands next to one toilet and hurls the turd hopefully into the distant toilet. The ones who succeed are entered into the turd toss off (unless only one succeeds and then they are crowned Turd Queen or Turd King). It's like sudden death in hockey...the tosses continue until each contestant has an equal shot at the toilet and one who gets the most in wins. All of this is done to wild cheers from the audience which amounts to half the park. Everyone lines the street, sitting in their lawn chairs or golf carts and cheers for every single contestant, maybe louder for their best friends. I booed Sheila and Joann until I was definitely out of the running and then became one of their loudest supporters.
This year I hope to add a new rule to the toss. It's really dumb but we're not given a practice toss before we do one that counts. I want a practice toss so I'll submit the request to our Turd Captain, Mark. He runs the contest and owns the toilets.
A few years ago, I wrote a story about our annual Turd Toss, which I think is hilarious, and submitted it to Reader's Digest. Never heard back from them!
Anyway, I'll post the winner's names later on today or tomorrow and hope that mine is one of them.
Every year we have Turd Toss Day and every year I fail to reach my goal...2 years ago the queen was my friend, Sheila, and last year it was my friend, Joann. Close but no cigars!
The game goes like this...2 toilets are placed in the middle of the street about 30 (?) feet apart and each contestant is given a turd made out of pantyhose filled with wet speghetti. Each contestant stands next to one toilet and hurls the turd hopefully into the distant toilet. The ones who succeed are entered into the turd toss off (unless only one succeeds and then they are crowned Turd Queen or Turd King). It's like sudden death in hockey...the tosses continue until each contestant has an equal shot at the toilet and one who gets the most in wins. All of this is done to wild cheers from the audience which amounts to half the park. Everyone lines the street, sitting in their lawn chairs or golf carts and cheers for every single contestant, maybe louder for their best friends. I booed Sheila and Joann until I was definitely out of the running and then became one of their loudest supporters.
This year I hope to add a new rule to the toss. It's really dumb but we're not given a practice toss before we do one that counts. I want a practice toss so I'll submit the request to our Turd Captain, Mark. He runs the contest and owns the toilets.
A few years ago, I wrote a story about our annual Turd Toss, which I think is hilarious, and submitted it to Reader's Digest. Never heard back from them!
Anyway, I'll post the winner's names later on today or tomorrow and hope that mine is one of them.
Sunday, March 11, 2012
There Comes A Time
There comes a time, a moment, when all is clear and you know without a doubt that you must act. Sometimes that moment forces you to do what you don't want to do but you know that placing one foot in front of the other is the right thing to do.
When my husband was dying, I hated every moment of watching him move closer to death but, at the end, I would have gladly snuffed out his life rather than watch him suffer needlessly. He knew the moment, too, because he strongly stated that he was ready to go, as though he'd thought about it for months and knew the time had come. I knew he was only days from death and that his wish would come true quickly but, when I look back, it would have been kinder to have taken his life at that very moment.
But there comes a time to let go, to let go of a beloved child who leaves the nest to begin building their own adult lives; to let go of a lover who has moved on; to let go of plans that you know will never come to fruition. Letting go can be painful but it's also a way of your mind allowing you to carry on with your own life in a new way.
I've "let go" of many, many hopes and dreams in my lifetime but it wasn't the end for me. I built new ones and that's the nice thing about the human spirit...despite setbacks, we can keep on trucking if we just give ourselves half a chance. Letting go doesn't mean giving up, it means taking a different path.
There will always be that moment when we know that things have changed and we have to act on the change but it can be done. It's either that or we give in to a life of unhappiness. Like a wise person once said, "I choose to be happy.", and that's a philosophy I try to follow.
When my husband was dying, I hated every moment of watching him move closer to death but, at the end, I would have gladly snuffed out his life rather than watch him suffer needlessly. He knew the moment, too, because he strongly stated that he was ready to go, as though he'd thought about it for months and knew the time had come. I knew he was only days from death and that his wish would come true quickly but, when I look back, it would have been kinder to have taken his life at that very moment.
But there comes a time to let go, to let go of a beloved child who leaves the nest to begin building their own adult lives; to let go of a lover who has moved on; to let go of plans that you know will never come to fruition. Letting go can be painful but it's also a way of your mind allowing you to carry on with your own life in a new way.
I've "let go" of many, many hopes and dreams in my lifetime but it wasn't the end for me. I built new ones and that's the nice thing about the human spirit...despite setbacks, we can keep on trucking if we just give ourselves half a chance. Letting go doesn't mean giving up, it means taking a different path.
There will always be that moment when we know that things have changed and we have to act on the change but it can be done. It's either that or we give in to a life of unhappiness. Like a wise person once said, "I choose to be happy.", and that's a philosophy I try to follow.
Saturday, March 10, 2012
Freaking Out
I just listened to a recording of a flight attendant who freaked out and began screaming over the intercom during a flight. It must have been terrifying for the passengers but it's also an indication of what lies inside all of us if we don't maintain control.
Anyone who has been under severe stress knows how close to the surface an episode like this can be. The more stress, the more difficult it is for us to behave in a controlled manner. Just watch someone who accidently comes in contact with something they fear (spider, snake, etc.). All personal control flies out the window when our stress level soars beyond our ability to cope.
Every single person you deal with every single day is showing a facade of what they really are inside. We usually behave in a way that presents us the way we want to be viewed but it may be far from the reality of what and who we really are. The transmission man who robbed me of $2000 this year had a big smile on his face but I swear there was evil in his eyes. I believe you can read a person just by looking into their eyes and not being fooled by a phony smile.
My heart goes out to that flight attendant because they must have been going through hell for a long time trying to hide their misery from the world. Something must have happened to crack the facade...like the straw that broke the camel's back...to make them lose control of themselves. Who knows what demons they've been fighting or for how long. And now it's the job of a good psychiatrist to help put those demons back in the box. I wish them luck.
Anyone who has been under severe stress knows how close to the surface an episode like this can be. The more stress, the more difficult it is for us to behave in a controlled manner. Just watch someone who accidently comes in contact with something they fear (spider, snake, etc.). All personal control flies out the window when our stress level soars beyond our ability to cope.
Every single person you deal with every single day is showing a facade of what they really are inside. We usually behave in a way that presents us the way we want to be viewed but it may be far from the reality of what and who we really are. The transmission man who robbed me of $2000 this year had a big smile on his face but I swear there was evil in his eyes. I believe you can read a person just by looking into their eyes and not being fooled by a phony smile.
My heart goes out to that flight attendant because they must have been going through hell for a long time trying to hide their misery from the world. Something must have happened to crack the facade...like the straw that broke the camel's back...to make them lose control of themselves. Who knows what demons they've been fighting or for how long. And now it's the job of a good psychiatrist to help put those demons back in the box. I wish them luck.
Sunday, March 04, 2012
Canadian Healthcare Shame
We Canadians like to look down our noses when it comes to comparing our health care system to that of the United States but today I've been put in my place.
My sister-in-law is gravely ill and has been hospitalized for the past two weeks in New Brunswick. Not only are her doctors divided about what the cause of her illness is...some say cancer while others say it isn't...but tomorrow they're sending her off to another hospital for more tests. They're doing this by having her daughter drive her mother one hour to the other hospital...apparently there isn't an available ambulance in the province to transport this seriously ill woman.
My sister-in-law is jaundiced, in pain, with only the strength to crawl out of bed to the bathroom but our government health services see fit to send her on a one hour car trip which will certainly be an ordeal for her. They'll kindly send her back to her current hospital in an ambulance, though.
In Canada, our personal taxes are very high compared to the U.S. but we accept that much of it goes to ensuring we won't be bankrupted should we need medical care. But what level of care are we expecting, should be expecting? It certainly isn't what I'm seeing for my sister-in-law.
To take a seriously ill woman from her hospital bed and force her to drive in a private car for an hour to another hospital for tests is nothing less than criminal.
Maybe we Canadians are taking too much for granted with our health care system and maybe we should be demanding accountability from hospitals who treat their patients in this way. Over the years I've seen a decrease in efficiency and quality of our health care but I'm truly shocked by this last episode. I'm definitely not blaming the doctors or nurses but I do blame the hospital administrators if they continue to accept public funds when they can't provide decent care. The public is well aware that millions of dollars are being wasted by inept administrators but we're helpless to stop it. How did such a wonderful concept (socialized health care provided for all Canadians) lose it's way?
I have another sister-in-law who practiced law until she retired. Maybe we are seeing a lawsuit in the making.
My sister-in-law is gravely ill and has been hospitalized for the past two weeks in New Brunswick. Not only are her doctors divided about what the cause of her illness is...some say cancer while others say it isn't...but tomorrow they're sending her off to another hospital for more tests. They're doing this by having her daughter drive her mother one hour to the other hospital...apparently there isn't an available ambulance in the province to transport this seriously ill woman.
My sister-in-law is jaundiced, in pain, with only the strength to crawl out of bed to the bathroom but our government health services see fit to send her on a one hour car trip which will certainly be an ordeal for her. They'll kindly send her back to her current hospital in an ambulance, though.
In Canada, our personal taxes are very high compared to the U.S. but we accept that much of it goes to ensuring we won't be bankrupted should we need medical care. But what level of care are we expecting, should be expecting? It certainly isn't what I'm seeing for my sister-in-law.
To take a seriously ill woman from her hospital bed and force her to drive in a private car for an hour to another hospital for tests is nothing less than criminal.
Maybe we Canadians are taking too much for granted with our health care system and maybe we should be demanding accountability from hospitals who treat their patients in this way. Over the years I've seen a decrease in efficiency and quality of our health care but I'm truly shocked by this last episode. I'm definitely not blaming the doctors or nurses but I do blame the hospital administrators if they continue to accept public funds when they can't provide decent care. The public is well aware that millions of dollars are being wasted by inept administrators but we're helpless to stop it. How did such a wonderful concept (socialized health care provided for all Canadians) lose it's way?
I have another sister-in-law who practiced law until she retired. Maybe we are seeing a lawsuit in the making.
Tornado
Tornadoes have been causing untold damage to the United States lately and it always makes me wonder what kind of chance a person in a trailer would have if a tornado hit them. If a tornado is powerful enough to level a brick building, just think what it can do to a tin can trailer.
I woke this morning to hear a roar in the wind that sounded somewhat like the train sound you hear with a tornado. I listened carefully as the wind became stronger and stronger until the rain began pelting my little trailer, wondering if it really was a tornado. The wind and rain roared through at a fast pace before heading for parts unknown. It may not have been a tornado but it was a reminder that nature can be gentle or it can be vicious.
I'm thinking now that I was wrong to remain in bed just listening for so long (moments) but should have sprung up and better assessed if I was in danger. Tornadoes don't give a lot of warning and I would have been better able to cope with a severe storm if I was up and ready to move out to safer protection. The only place in this park that could offer any security is the pool room at the library and it's not very big but it is close by.
The wind was very strong last evening as we sat and watched the talent show in the clubhouse and I worried that it might cause a problem with planes landing at the airport. One of my friends was expecting her family to fly in at 10 P.M. and I knew that the storm was approaching. Luckily it held off until this morning so I'm hoping any damage done was minimal.
Marilee's daughter lives in Little Rock, Arkansas and Marilee said it isn't unusual for them to have up to 16 tornadoes come through in a day. How terrifying to live under those conditions! It's true that not all tornadoes are deadly but many are and we should never take chances when given warnings. It seems to me that there have been way too many deadly tornadoes so early this year and I wonder how we'll fare throughout the summer. I wonder if my little tin can trailer will still be here next October when I return south. It's up to nature, I guess.
I woke this morning to hear a roar in the wind that sounded somewhat like the train sound you hear with a tornado. I listened carefully as the wind became stronger and stronger until the rain began pelting my little trailer, wondering if it really was a tornado. The wind and rain roared through at a fast pace before heading for parts unknown. It may not have been a tornado but it was a reminder that nature can be gentle or it can be vicious.
I'm thinking now that I was wrong to remain in bed just listening for so long (moments) but should have sprung up and better assessed if I was in danger. Tornadoes don't give a lot of warning and I would have been better able to cope with a severe storm if I was up and ready to move out to safer protection. The only place in this park that could offer any security is the pool room at the library and it's not very big but it is close by.
The wind was very strong last evening as we sat and watched the talent show in the clubhouse and I worried that it might cause a problem with planes landing at the airport. One of my friends was expecting her family to fly in at 10 P.M. and I knew that the storm was approaching. Luckily it held off until this morning so I'm hoping any damage done was minimal.
Marilee's daughter lives in Little Rock, Arkansas and Marilee said it isn't unusual for them to have up to 16 tornadoes come through in a day. How terrifying to live under those conditions! It's true that not all tornadoes are deadly but many are and we should never take chances when given warnings. It seems to me that there have been way too many deadly tornadoes so early this year and I wonder how we'll fare throughout the summer. I wonder if my little tin can trailer will still be here next October when I return south. It's up to nature, I guess.
Saturday, March 03, 2012
Intervention
Joann, Barb, and I did a bit of yard saleing this morning and then went to the casino. This isn't our usual day but, since I didn't lose any money when we went earlier in the week, I thought it would be nice to give the casino another chance to rob me. They managed to get $26 out of me today but I was very happy that they didn't take it all. We had fun and that's what counts, though.
Marilee stopped in when I got home and asked if I'd been to the casino and, when I said yes, she said that she and Faye were going to have an intervention for me. I laughed and laughed...but then I wondered if she wasn't kidding. Nah...I love to gamble but I do so in moderation and don't lose as much as I would if I smoked a pack of cigarettes a day. That's my excuse and I'm sticking to it.
Tonight we have a baked potato bar with all the fixin's over at the clubhouse...$3 and it's so good that I wish we had it more often. After dinner there is a talent show that should be lots of fun.
I never enjoyed myself this much when I was young. It's a simple life but so empty of stress that I wish I'd lived like this all my life.
Life is good!
Marilee stopped in when I got home and asked if I'd been to the casino and, when I said yes, she said that she and Faye were going to have an intervention for me. I laughed and laughed...but then I wondered if she wasn't kidding. Nah...I love to gamble but I do so in moderation and don't lose as much as I would if I smoked a pack of cigarettes a day. That's my excuse and I'm sticking to it.
Tonight we have a baked potato bar with all the fixin's over at the clubhouse...$3 and it's so good that I wish we had it more often. After dinner there is a talent show that should be lots of fun.
I never enjoyed myself this much when I was young. It's a simple life but so empty of stress that I wish I'd lived like this all my life.
Life is good!
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