Women Don't Spit

I used to think that only dirty old men spit but then I noticed how often baseball players practice this digusting habit. Now I hear that Tiger Woods has been charged with spitting on the golf course. What is it with men and spitting? I have never seen a woman spit but I've cringed with disgust many times as I watched a man gob onto the sidewalk.

There can be no need for this to happen. It's why Kleenex was invented...so that we can dispose of our nasal fluids behind a soft cloud of fluffy paper where, hopefully, no-one else has to see them.

Then there are the men (usually) who blow their nose like they're trumpeting in the cavalry. Heaven forbid you are near one of these guys and don't notice that they're about to blow their nose because the sudden explosion of sound will knock you off your feet. I've never heard a woman do this, either.

Farting is another male dominated sport. I suppose we women should consider ourselves lucky that the only male farts we have to suffer through are let go by men we live with. I don't know how they manage to let them out silently when they're out in public but they blast holes in their undies when they're home. Women don't do this. We waft.

Well, enough of this subject. It's only proven that women are superior to men but we already knew that.