Vanessa Redgrave is currently doing a monologue on stage written about how a woman coped with the death of her husband and daughter. It got me thinking.
When my husband passed away I couldn't rid my house of all his belongings fast enough. Each item was too powerful a reminder of Dennis in his healthy days and it disturbed me deeply to see them around the house...his house.
I sent monstrous piles of clothes to my grandson's church and gave untold piles of paperwork and momentos to my children...our children.
We used a few large, framed photographs at his funeral. Some went to my children and some were supposed to remain with me. It became too difficult for me to see those pictures of him so they also were passed along to my children. His wedding ring, and mine, are in a little silk bag next to him inside the mausoleum niche where his ashes are interred.
Two articles of his clothing I kept. One was a leather jacket that eventually went to one of our grandsons...I hadn't offered it originally because I thought he might feel uncomfortable wearing it but he was thrilled when I did give it to him. The other item was Dennis' leather moccasins. I can't give them away and I can't stand to see them so they're tucked away in the back of a closet. It tears me up now thinking about those darned shoes. Somehow they've become my connection to a man I loved with all my heart at one time.
Why the shoes, I wonder?
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