This basement just might be the death of me. Just as things were starting to look up we discovered that the guy who originally started the reno and then ran out had not bought enough laminate flooring...about 150 square feet short and it couldn't be matched!
I calmed myself, found out I could return the unused portion to Home Depot for a credit and then re-order enough to complete the rec room and stairs. It wouldn't match what has been laid in the sewing room but that wasn't the end of the world.
Today I wore myself out trying to clear the rec room so that the men would have room to work when I discovered a big problem...at least I think it is. The man who tore down my walls without asking me has replaced part of the rec room walls with particle (?) board instead of drywall. I'm not sure why anyone would do such a thing. I'm overtired and fed up and this latest discovery has hit me hard.
I've been proud of my ability to overcome many years of depression but, when I'm overwhelmed and overtired, I lose confidence in myself to stay strong. I'm not sure how much more of this I can take. There is a breaking point no matter how hard you try not to reach it.
The men who have taken over the job have been marvelous but I don't know if they'll have the time to replace those damn walls. It's the busy season for renovators and I'm sure they have other jobs lined up and ready to go. I really think my calm has seen it's last day.
As I was out cutting the grass this afternoon I wondered if maybe trying to look after this house was beyond me and maybe it was time to sell and move into an apartment. I'll go to bed early tonight, have a good sleep, and see how I feel in the morning.
Never, ever try to make important decisions when you're tired, frightened, or grieving. Today I'm tired.
2 comments:
A wise woman (that would be you) once taught me "This Too Shall Pass" - though the painful memory doesn't ever fade completely away, the frustration does. Hang in there!!
That same wise woman just wrote, and I quote, "never, ever try to make important decisions when you're tired, frightened, or grieving." I think you are all of these and you need to let this all calm down, because it will. Very soon you will have a beautiful basement and all these feelings will be dull aches. You definately are strong enough, no question!
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