A friend lost her husband last year and is having a very difficult time going on with her life. She doesn't live near me back home and doesn't use a computer so it's just here at the park in Florida that I've had a real chance to talk to her.
Since her husband passed away she hasn't been able to sleep in the house they shared at home but has spent all this past year staying with one child or another. The house holds so many memories of their life together...I remember that so clearly from when my own husband passed away. Everywhere you look is a memory of times past when your husband was well and strong.
She lives a 4 day drive from Florida and I'm sure she could have made the journey herself but her son drove her down and then flew home. She's been encouraged to drive her own vehicle while she's here and that is a smart thing to do. It must have been so hard to move into the trailer she'd shared with her husband but she's managed.
We have a large group of good friends here and all have done whatever they could to help her adjust. One thing I learned is to allow her to speak as often as she wants about her husband but not to bring up the subject myself. I think she's able to forget for a while but if I mention him she's reminded too quickly and she cries. I also remember that from my own experience.
Becoming a widow or a widower, no matter how much warning you have, is devastating. Everyone learns to cope in their own way and in their own time. People just have to allow them that time to adjust their lives and move on.
She seems to be doing okay, enjoying the time she spends with her group of friends. I'm betting she'll be a different and stronger lady by the time our Florida winter ends and she goes back home.
Love, laughter, and caring can heal us all if we let it.
1 comment:
Send her my love <3
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