Good Marriage/Bad Marriage

I've been thinking...probably a dangerous occupation but we seniors have lots of time to think, and reminisce.

Every day I see such loving old couples and I try to analyze what went wrong in my own marriage. In good marriages, there seems to be a tenderness displayed that I never experienced. It's truly heart-warming to watch the caring attitudes between a man and wife who have spent 50 years together and overcome every disaster possible.

I see the tenderness in a gentle touch between them or a soft and loving glance that others, not so nosy, would miss. I get all sappy when I see an elderly couple holding hands because my own husband had an abhorence of showing public affection. He could be very cold and this was one thing that made me feel quite alone at times.

The way I interpret this is that there is a bonding between a man and wife that either occurs or doesn't occur. When there is a true bonding, nothing can come between the couple...they are bonded for life. Once bonded, they feel an affection towards one another that creates the tenderness I see in so many couples here.

A husband and wife need to open up to each other and trust each other completely. I don't think my husband was able to be that vulnerable and so we lost the opportunity to bond. My own faults were multiple...a problem marriage is never one sided. Maybe if I'd had more patience...maybe...maybe.