Downtown Tim's

Some lady friends and I went to the downtown core of our fair city last night to see an Elvis (Presley) impersonator show. I seldom do more than drive through downtown because I hate to pay for parking and everything I might want can be found at a mall. Downtown at night is not a safe place to be, either.

We met for dinner at a nice restaurant down there that I haven't been to in maybe 15 years. It's still the same and the food is still as delicious. I think it deserves to be mentioned by name ..."The Black Forest"! Most restaurants start out with hopes of becoming popular and then, when they do, change their menu and their theme. This restaurant has held true to it's roots and I can't wait to go back again soon.

The Elvis show was wonderful and, as usual for me, I started to classify the crowd into sex and age groups. Of course the women outnumbered the men by at least 50-1 but I got a bit of a surprise as I tallied up the age groups. My age group, the ones who were with the real Elvis from the start of his career, was not the largest. I'd say that the largest group of women were in the 40-50 year old range. Good old Elvis...we all loved him!

After the show I suggested we go to a Tim Hortons for coffee and all agreed. I wanted to head back up to a residential area and go to a Tim's there but one of my friends insisted we should go to one closer...in the downtown area.

I squawked "A downtown Tim's at night! Are you crazy?" but my fears were laughed away. Stupid women.

So off to a Tim Hortons in the downtown core we went...at 11 P.M. on a Friday night. Four old gals, only one of which had the common sense to know who frequents a downtown Tim Hortons late at night.

My sister-in-law, Faye, who was my driver, began to see the error of our ways before we arrived at our destination. I distinctly heard her mutter under her breath as a police car drove by, "Please be going to Tims, too. Think coffee/donuts!" Her quiet pleas went unheard by the cops as they passed us and passed the Tims.

We pulled into the parking lot of a busy, busy Tim's. By busy, I mean the parking lot was filled with more people than cars. Possibly more motorcycles than cars! Some of the people were ragged and dirty and most likely street people. One of them smiled kindly at us (or our purses) and held open the restaurant door, loudly congratulating himself for being a gentleman. The bikers in the parking lot ignored him.

Faye and I had to pee before having a coffee so we clung to each other and moved as one to the ladies room. Lined up in front of the bathroom door were about 4 or 5 hookers waiting to use the facilities. Don't ask me how I knew they were hookers. Anyone could have picked this bunch out of a police lineup.

Faye turned abruptly and dragged me back outside and we told our other friends that there was no way we were staying there. They shook their heads and rolled their eyes but agreed to meet us at another Tim's in a better part of town.

In time, we had seated ourselves at a nice, neighborly Tims, happily drinking the best coffee in the world.

The moral of this story is...don't get too far out of your element or you won't want to use the bathroom there.