In-Laws

I had an especially nice, long talk with an in-law today, mainly about the best way for in-laws to get along. We're all in this family for life so we should do everything in our power to make things run smoothly. Sometimes it takes a little glitch in the run in order to understand the best way to do this.

I remember I used the word "tact" a lot and it's true that everyone, whether family, friends, or workmates, get along better if you use tact when dealing with them. Some in-laws (and blood relatives) can try your patience but it's always worthwhile to keep it friendly. One cross word said at the wrong time can take ages to dispel and be forgotten, especially if the recipient has a thin skin.

I explained how I'd always been easily hurt by thoughtless words and actions but I've toughened up over the years. Nowadays, I can step back and assess whether it's worth the trouble to be angry over any incident. It's true none of us are perfect and sometimes we speak too quickly out of anger or misunderstanding. Keeping the family unit intact is more important than getting our backs up over a stupid spat.

I love my family, some members more than others, but I feel we're all part of a clan destined to look after every one in it. So too harsh words need to be softened and relationships need to be continually strengthened for the clan to survive. We might not need every in-law that arrives but we need to respect them and their place in the family.

You can never go wrong using tact and respect. If it's returned, then everyone is a winner. If it's not, then there is a ripple effect of hurt and anger spreading outward and affecting everyone in it's wake.

A few years ago I got fed up with my sister who was having too many snits and I decided to just stay away from her. Now, this is a sister I love dearly but her bad temper was too much to put up with so I just stopped calling her. This went on for months until one day I received notice that she was in the hospital. It turned out to be an appendectomy but the shock woke me up from my own snit. I loved her too much to live the rest of my life without her. We made up and we're best friends once again. Sometimes it takes a good shake to make us think clearly and realize what really matters.

Family matters. Blood kin, in-laws, common laws...we're on this journey together so we all have to play nice.