Today is our annual Turd Toss Day in the park and I'll be doing my best to win the coveted title of "Turd Queen". I never have in all the years I've been here but one year my friend, Joann, won and let me wear the Turd Queen hat for a few moments. The closest I ever came was about 10 years ago and I really thought I had it until Ginnie dunked one more turd than I did.
The Turd Toss goes like this. 2 clean toilets are placed about 20' apart on Easy St. Each turd tosser is given 2 turds (stocking wrapped speghetti or something like that) and stands behind or next to one of the toilets. They toss the turds into the distant toilet if they're lucky and accurate. The man tossing the most turds into the toilet is dubbed Turd King and the woman tossing the most turds in receives the title of Turd Queen.
How this yearly ritual came about is a mystery but the two people who always were in charge, Charlotte and Mark, have moved from the park and I don't know who has taken over their roles now. I guess I'll find out at 2 P.M. today when I'll be lined up and waiting to attempt once again to be the official Turd Queen.
Oh yes, someone has also always baked a gummy worm cake which closely resembles a used kitty litter box. Where these ideas came from is anybody's guess but they're fun and get a massive turnout of participants and watchers.
Since I wasn't here last year, I'm not sure if the "after toss" pot luck and dancing in the street still goes on. This may all sound silly but it's the silly things in life that are the most fun.
Wish me luck!
Update: I lost..again. Molly won the Turd Queen title and Nelson, bless his 90+ year old heart, won the Turd King title. His precision was amazing!
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