I Reached A Milestone Today

I'm one who likes to do for herself and not depend on others.  All my adult life I've looked forward to spring cleaning to wash my own windows (on the inside) but today I realized my window washing days are done.

I knew something was different this year because I dreaded climbing the step ladder (only 1 step) because I get a bit dizzy.  I've tolerated this uncomfortable feeling for quite a few years but the worry about falling and breaking a hip is stronger now.  I did manage to wash the inside and outside of the patio doors but it was a struggle.  I left the step ladder against the kitchen window for at least 2 weeks before attempting to wash it and wash the curtains.  I love getting this done because it looks so fresh.

Anyway, today was the day and I gathered up my cleaning materials before taking that momentous step up the ladder.  It was even worse than I'd feared.  I was light headed immediately but I persevered and got it done.  It scared me.  I knew it would be foolhardy to continue with the bedroom windows so my new plan is to hire Brent (Don's friend) again.  I hired him once before to wash blinds, ceiling fans, baseboards, and under the sink.  He did an excellent job but I still felt I should be doing this stuff.  Anyway, pride truly does go before a fall...literally...and I'll ask Brent to clean the bedroom windows for me.  I had Cindy wash the ceiling fan blades last week so they're okay.

In everyone's life there comes a time when you know you need help with certain things.  Seniors face this every few years at least because we really are in freefall.  It sometimes seems our strength disappears faster by the hour.  I'm lucky to have Brent willing to do small jobs for me.  Living in an apartment means there are no major jobs any more but letting too many little chores pile up leads to a messy home.

By the way, the kitchen window looks great, clean window and clean white curtains.  It makes me feel good.  I'm closing in on my 80th birthday in August and I know I'll probably still struggle with chores that test me but I don't think they'll involve climbing a step ladder any more.

Have I Been Wrong All Along

There have been so many questions about how the coronavirus has been handled and I thought we had it right by shutting down businesses and parks but I listened to a California doctor today that made me rethink it all.

We've all questioned why liquor stores have been allowed to remain open when almost all similar sized businesses were forced to close their doors and possibly lose their business.  I've certainly looked down upon the groups of people who defied the stay home order and thronged to beaches and parks...but have we heard whether any of these people caught the virus?  We've known all along that the elderly and people in poor health were the most at risk of dying from the virus but those people are the vast minority.  

I don't believe the virus was deliberately released and I find it ludicrous for anyone to believe this all happened in order to get rid of Trump.  I do believe more and more that most businesses could have been allowed to stay open if they limited the crowds on their premises.  I was fully impressed that no country, let alone every country, would destroy their economy unless it was absolutely necessary in order to preserve humanity.  Now I'm wondering if it really was necessary to shut down every business except Walmart and Costco.  True, we can't survive without groceries but it seems more than groceries were being sold to the public.

Were we already in the middle of an economical meltdown and the virus gave government leaders the grounds to obliterate small businesses?  Is it only co-incidence that the elderly in nursing homes died like flies?  The elderly are not cost efficient when it comes to needing round the clock care.

We definitely are going to recreate a new economy now and that will take years but, if certain people had the funds to invest in the present market, they will soar when the economy starts to build up once again.  Is this whole fiasco more about restarting a brand new economy over the dead bodies of mainly seniors?  Could we have had the same health consequences with businesses open as we have with them closed?  I'm not questioning the deadly outbreak but in how it's been handled.

Surgeons are still operating on emergency cases but I can't see my family doctor, dentist, or dermatologist for routine care.  People are putting their lives in danger because they dare not go to the hospital unless they're near death and their health is not being monitored by their own doctors.  But they can ease their worries with trips to the liquor stores.

I've taken a real step back from my previous beliefs that our government is acting responsibly and wondering if we've ruined our economy needlessly.  

We hear on the news every day how many new cases of coronavirus are in our country, province, or city but we aren't always told how many of these cases are mild ones.   In Canada we've had about 80,000+ people infected and just over 6,000 people die but the most deaths by far are seniors in nursing home or with existing medical problems.  This is in a population of 38 million people.  We have 500-1500 cases of flu in Canada every year and approximately 3,500 deaths.  The coronavirus is quite serious but is it serious enough to shut down almost every business in the country?

We have never had a virus shut down a country since 1918 and we've weathered many different viruses since then and people do die from these other viruses.

I think my biggest question is why liquor stores have been allowed to remain open and not other businesses.  There has to be a reason.

Surgery Finally

I don't usually complain about our government health system but I'm not too happy with it today.  Kim fell off her bike on Sunday and broke her wrist and it's taken until today for her to have the surgery to mend it.  I accept that elective surgery in Canada will take longer to arrange but walking around with a broken wrist shouldn't be considered elective surgery.

When my wrist was broken, I spent hours in emergency only to be sent home before surgery could be done.  If my memory is correct, I spent the next day waiting only to be bumped again.  It makes sense that worse cases needing surgery should take precedence over a broken wrist but maybe these long waits mean we don't have enough surgeons in the system.  I'm just glad at the moment that Kim is finally getting her surgery today...3 days after her accident.

Wearing The Mask

I'm going out for groceries today and I'll be wearing a mask.  I hate it because it's hard to breathe when it's on but I'm doing it not only to maybe protect myself but anyone else who comes close to me.  I'm a responsible person.

I don't judge non-mask wearing people I run into because there could be many reasons they're not wearing a mask.  I choose to believe they would wear one if they could find one.  If they simply choose to not care about their fellow man/woman, I'd rather not know that.

This will be my first trek to the outside world since last Sunday and I have a small list of groceries I want to get.  In the old world, I would also stop at various stores because I also have a short list of items I want that I can't get at the grocery store.  I want a new rug for the livingroom, a remote control for Netflix (for when I get it installed), and maybe a new T.V.  None of these things are essentials so they can wait for a better day.

I rarely go out to just one store but try to hit a few when I'm out and about.  I normally grocery shop 2-3 times a week but not now.  Going once a week wearing the damned mask which inhibits my breathing is as much as I can stand.  Even when the stores and restaurants open up to the public again, I'll be very selective how I'll patronize them.  I'll want lots of room to shop and eat.  I think crowds will intimidate me for a long time.  I also won't be going to the casino because just the thought of how many people are touching the controls on those machines makes me a little ill.

I'm looking forward to shopping at outdoor markets which should be available to us soon.  I'm also looking forward to having my blood tested for antibodies since the government just approved a test for it.  I think it's the same blood test that the U.S. approved months ago.  

I don't like this new world but it's all we have so we'd better make the best of it. 

Listening to the Arrogance

I made the mistake of turning on the T.V. to watch the Canadian news and then walking away to play on the computer.  This meant that I listened to nothing but COVID news for at least an hour.  It was the last person being interviewed that finally caught my attention.  I don't know his name but he's the leader of the Bloc Quebecois party...they're usually arrogant but this man was terrible.

Quebec had some of the worst cases of the virus outbreak in their nursing homes where many, many people died.  It was truly disgusting to hear that their caregivers abandoned them out of fear of catching the virus themselves and the owners of the nursing homes either weren't on scene or ignored these poor souls dying in their own filth.  The reporter interviewing the BQ leader had a difficult time getting him to answer her questions...the first sign that he had something to hide.  She asked repeatedly if he believed Quebec's nursing homes should be under government control rather than private ownership where they needed to earn a profit.  He finally responded with an arrogance that demeaned him.  And, no, he saw nothing wrong with nursing homes being privately owned and said there would have been just as many senior deaths if the nursing homes were government run.

He might be right but the nursing homes with the most deaths and disgraceful conditions were privately owned and that must make us try something different so it doesn't happen again.  Patients in nursing homes are probably the most vulnerable of all our citizens and deserve 100% protection by their government.

I've said before that what most seniors fear is senility but being put in a nursing home comes very close.  I wouldn't fear it if I knew the nursing home was well run with good caregivers but how horrible it would be to be bedridden and sick and in an abusive situation.

My Cindy eases my fears by telling me she'll never put me in a nursing home and that's all well and good but children who take on the homecare of their helpless parents are giving up their own lives to do so.  No loving parent wants to put that burden on their children.  I remember Jackie trying to care for Ferne in her home and having to accept defeat when she found water pouring down the stairs in her house because Ferne had left a tap running.  Senile patients need specialized care because they are not rational through no fault of their own and that irrationality can prove dangerous to them and others.

I'll be 80 in August and so far my mind is fairly good.  I can take care of myself in my own apartment, drive, and even write blogs.  LOL!  I know it all could change in a moment but I am very grateful for today.    

I Saw Jackson

There are quite a few momentous moments in our lives, too many to count, but one of mine was seeing my greatgrandson, Jackson, for the first time in real life.  I couldn't get close to him or touch him because of the restrictions of the virus but it was such a great pleasure to just look at him in wonder.  He is beautiful, of course, but I saw much more than that.  I saw a perfect and healthy baby boy whose eyes wandered the room (it was the garage), not at random, but making choices to stare at things and try to figure them out.  I saw great intelligence in those less than 3 month old eyes and that gave me comfort.  I also saw, as I have in photos, how much he looks like his Uncle Kyle and that made me feel good to see the genes have jumped to the next generation.

I also watched how his father, Jake, handled him with love, care, and confidence.  You would have thought this was his 5th child instead of his first.  Aeron was ever attentive but very willing to allow the family to hold him if they wore a surgical mask.  I couldn't do it because I'm too filled with fear of infecting him.  I don't have the virus but who knows.  It's something I chose to do without as long as I could still stare at his beautiful face.

I'm feeling terribly old these days and I know why.  The mirror should have made me feel that way a long time ago but it's been this damned virus threatening me and my generation that has finally beaten me down.  I catch everything going around and that makes me feel vulnerable.  I might be carrying antibodies but I might not be and that's a good reason to have it checked with a blood test when one is available.

Years ago, parents used to have measles parties where they would take their young children and expose them to another child with measles.  The idea was that they only needed to have measles once and then they'd carry the antibodies for the rest of their lives.  Measles isn't too bad on children but much more dangerous if an adult gets it.  At least that's what I heard.

It would be a gift from heaven if anyone who got COVID-19 became immune to it for the rest of their lives.  Not only would this protect them but also everyone they came in contact with.

We really need a vaccine to combat this horrible virus and I know in my heart that we won't be too long getting one.  Something else infectious will come along to take it's place but hopefully it won't be as deadly.

Well, my plans are to stay home until a vaccine is available.  No Florida for sure.  Even when they get the vaccine, I'll want to know that the cases of people infected have dwindled to near zero before I even think about getting on a plane.  Again, I'm feeling ridiculously vulnerable and filled with too much uncertainty.  I want my life back.  

Irresponsible Covid Abusers

It's difficult to understand the mindset of people who deliberately defy the distancing rules of the coronavirus.  Do these people think they're immune?  Do they understand that many people risk death if they come in contact with the virus?  I watched a video of some of the stupidest people put on this earth as they took their young children to a playground that was roped off to protect the public from the virus.

They verbally abused a police officer sent to remove them, all the while filming it for their dumbass 15 minutes of "fame" as their children watched and learned from them.The police officers were unbelievably lenient on these idiots and should have arrested them on the spot.  One idiot demanded to be arrested and then, surprise, looked shocked and fought the officer as he applied handcuffs to her.  She should not be allowed to breed!

A woman on Facebook whined how her rights were being violated because of the restrictions so I and many others reminded her that the rest of us have rights, too, and don't want her contaminating us just because she can't go about her regular life right now.  Where the hell do these people get off feeling they can do as they please??

People have swarmed the beaches and parks and then gone grocery shopping and possibly contaminated items that some poor senior touched and got sick, maybe died.  Have we raised generations of entitled brats to the extent that they have little or no empathy for their fellow man/woman?  I'm generalizing because there are more of the younger generation who do care and who do take precautions to prevent spreading the virus but I've seen a lot of photos of crowded beaches and parks lately.

It does boil down to entitlement, though.  Too many people thinking they are the center of the universe and who are going to be shocked out of their skins when they fall on their faces.  We're a spoiled society for sure and doing without the luxuries we've become used to even for a short time is intolerable to some.  We live in a comfort that even my ancestors could never have dreamed of...mine were poor, hardworking people.  

What we're seeing in these pitiful protesters is extreme ignorance.  Someone suggested they should go volunteer at a nursing home where the virus has ravaged the patients and the caregivers.  Good idea!  Maybe that would open their dim little eyes.