Time

We all look at time in different ways and often don't appreciate that time is all we have here.  When we're young and struggling with job, home, kids, and family, we never seem to have enough time to fit it all in.  Therefore we usually can't find enough contemplation time that's needed for emotional growth.

And then there are those who don't find enough to do to fill the hours of the day and they suffer from boredom and loneliness...all of their own making but still a sad state of affairs.

One of the most significant instances of time is when our hours here on earth are numbered, when illness or age impose a deadline we might or might not be ready to meet.  Time, in that case, becomes more precious than gold.

There is time wasted...waiting needlessly, being with people you don't care for, or deliberately harming your body (smoking, overeating, drug use).  Time can't be set aside to be used at a later date.  It's now or never so we should use it wisely.  

Time is what you make of it and it matters how you choose to use it.  The smart ones will remember that each day is a gift and we're here for a  purpose.  We're here to learn the value of kindness and love and not to practice cruelty and hatred.  If, in the end, we haven't learned that simple lesson then we've wasted a great opportunity.   

Nolan's First Sleepover

I adore this kid.  He's just so darned perfect and looks so much like his father that I can't help but love him to bits.

Well, maybe not so perfect.  I picked him up yesterday around 4:30 and we went looking for a restaurant that would serve him spaghetti (his request) and ended up at the "50's Diner" where they brought him a huge dish of speghetti and sauce.  I found out he doesn't like sauce but would accept some butter on his speghetti.  Funny, but that's how Tyson ate spaghetti when he was Nolan's age.

Anyway, Nolan is very independent and while he has some idea about putting his fork in the spaghetti and twirling it he didn't understand he couldn't then then just lift his fork straight out or the spaghetti would fall off.  And he wouldn't let me help him.  We battled for a while until he let me cut his speghetti into smaller pieces and he ate almost the whole thing.  I think we'll stick to burgers and fries from now on, though.

We blew bubbles out on the balcony for a while and then I let him watch cartoons until 9 P.M. when he was more than ready for bed.  I tucked him in and never heard a peep out of him until 6:30 this morning.  What an angel!

Our plans for the day are to do a little bit of yard saleing later in the morning (not much because the temps should be around 30C (90F) and then have lunch before picking up Kim to shop for his birthday present at Toys R Us.  His 5th birthday is on July 10th.

I'm so happy to have this time with him and to know how comfortable he is with his GG.  I honestly believe that a loving family, the larger the better, is what it takes to help a child develop into a confident and successful adult.  I hope he'll always remember how much his GG loves him.

  

Learning

I once told my grandson, Kyle, that we never stop learning no matter how old we get but I wasn't truly aware how exciting it is to learn something new.  Dealing with a computer, we seniors are tested every day on how to handle any given situation the darned thing throws at us but we do learn, even if it's slowly.

When I conquer a problem in any area, I know my aging brain cells are still alive and functioning.  Most of the seniors I know are like this and I can't understand the seniors who give in to age as an end to learning or enjoying life.  The brain is a magnificent organ, one of which we apparently only use a small portion.  Just think of what we humans could do if we utilized the whole thing!

I often half apologize for my ignorance when I tell someone how I have overcome a problem (usually on the computer) but I shouldn't do that.  Never apologize for success no matter how insignificant it might seem to others.  Every obstacle we overcome in life is a success for us because it broadens our abilities.

Now Kyle started and stopped his college education 3 times but he is now fully ensconced in his classes for the 4th time.  Do you think my words to him when he was a child stuck with him?  I hope it helped him to understand that it's never too late to learn.

Slavery in Canada?

I hated history and geography when I was in school so I don't know if the subject of slavery in Canada ever came up.  Until just last week I'd lived in my little dream world of smugly believing we Canadians had never involved ourselves in the repugnant practice of slavery.  I was enlightened to my mistake by 3 immigrants...granted, they immigrated here many, many years ago but they still knew more about Canadian history than I did.

Indeed, slavery was practiced in Canada (mainly the eastern provinces) until it was formally abolished in 1834.  The last known previous slave died right here in Ontario in 1871.  I believe most slaves in Canada were aboriginals (natives) but many black slaves were brought here by immigrants from Europe.  I am still astounded that this terrible practice isn't widely known.

Slavery is an inhumane thing to do to a human being.  Today, we know this and the fact that it happened in our country less than 200 years ago is something we shouldn't ignore.  History can teach us to be a better generation but we have to have clear and factual accounts in order for us to learn.

Just as the concentration camps in Germany should never be forgotten, we also need to know how slavery and all the horrors that come with it happened right here at home. 

Of Life and Death

I don't know why we live only to die in the end.  It's one of those mysteries of life that we may or may not ever find the answer.  As we age, death becomes more a part of our lives as friends and relatives pass on and we know we're heading in the same direction.  I'm not afraid of dying myself but I hate the thought of losing people now who are important parts of my life.  But therein lies the mystery and the inevitability of life...we all die in the end.

Because I have no religious affiliation, I've had to form my own beliefs of what happens to our spirit when our body gives out on us.  I know I've written before about how mine had better go on to a beautiful garden where there is no evil ever again.  Not much to ask for, is it?  I have had many out-of-body experiences in my lifetime and know of others who have had the same experiences so I'm pretty sure there is an important part of me that will survive death of the body I'm carting around.

I deeply believe in having the choice of euthanasia when all hope is gone and the patient will only continue suffering until his/her final demise.  It's interesting that Quebec is considering passing laws to allow it so hopefully Ontario will do the same soon.  That is only humane.

If I'm right and that beautiful, peaceful garden is my destination when I'm finished on earth, why would it be right to hold me here if I'm in pain and suffering?  It doesn't make sense.

No, I'm not in danger of leaving soon as far as I know.  I'm not in pain and I'm enjoying my senior life very much but I know it can't go on forever.  Many moons ago, Joyce and I agreed to euthanize one another when the time came but we joked that we'd also need to get a second opinion before taking that step.  

Life is precious because of what we can gain from our limited time here.  If we're lucky and make the right choices about what is really important in life...family, love, friendship, kindness...then our days on earth have been successful.

       

  

4 Year Olds & T-Ball

One of the most enjoyable ways to spend an hour or so on a summer's evening is to watch a group of 4 year olds learning to play t-ball.  

Last night we watched a very sad and reluctant Nolan learning the game and it wasn't too promising at first.  I'm sure his reluctance was because he didn't quite understand what he was supposed to do so he spent a lot of time drifting away from his team and clinging to his mother.  She wisely would send him back out on the field, trying to be oblivious to his tears.  I give him a lot of credit for actually returning to the field time and time again.

The diamond was filled with volunteer fathers that deserve a lot of credit for their valiant efforts in forming a wayward pile of 4 year old kids, some crying and many wandering, into a group that might become a team.  Matt and Steve (not fathers yet) showed patience that amazed me.

Forced by parental pressure to stay on the field despite his intense reluctance, Nolan decided to show his defiance by standing like a statue.  No problem..he was on the field.  Then he got into the large group of little kids who were bunched together waiting to catch the ball the other team hit off the t-ball stand.  At least he was now participating a little bit.  Then it was his turn at bat and a whole new Nolan appeared...we weren't sure who he was anymore.  He hit the ball and ran the bases.  He smiled.  From then on he was happy to be with his team, none of whom knew any more than he did.  And that was the beginning of him learning t-ball.  All worth the effort of parents and coaches.

A coach said it was like herding cats and that's exactly what it looked like.  Kids wandering and being urged back in; kids crying because they were overwhelmed and being hugged by one of the coaches; kids jumping on top of each other to catch the ball...and Nolan being accidentally run over by another player and receiving the first injury of the game, a scraped knee that was bandaged by his mother before sending her crying and injured son back onto the field.  She did the right thing.

T-ball is a right of passage for children.  It's their first real foray into the realm of sportsmanship.  It's where they learn what it means to belong to and support a team.  This little group of 4 year old children learned something important last night and it's all thanks to the coaches who volunteered their time and efforts.   

Sad

I haven't blogged lately because right now I have to use the laptop which is uncomfortable for me to type on.  But I couldn't let the recent tragedy of the senseless murder of 3 New Brunswick Mounties go without expressing my thoughts.

People seem to murder others for their own selfish reasons.  Either they feel like they're not getting what they think they deserve or they simply hate the world and want to hurt others as much as possible.  It all boils down to a deep selfishness that they and their perceived problems are more important than another human being's life.  The killer took the lives of 3 men who had families and children, were productive people in their jobs, and who had every right to live out their natural lives.  The killer was an angry young man who set out to cause death and destruction to anyone who came into his way.  I don't care why he was angry because he took the lives of 3 innocent human beings and he had no earthly right to do so.

If he hated life so much, he should have shot himself in the head instead of going out with the intention of killing others.  In my mind, he is a worthless piece of humanity because of the harm he's caused with his tirade.  It was a childish and selfish temper tantrum to draw attention to himself so that others would see how "important" he was.  He's not.

Life has always been what you choose to make of it.  The killer chose to make it worse and that tells you what kind of human being he is, useless and unimportant to the max. 

Buying a New Computer

Life is just too short to spend hours fighting with a computer that is malfunctioning.  Apparently mine is older than I thought, too, so it only makes sense to bite the bullet and buy a new one.  One good thing I found out is that I can get a new laptop but use a wireless keyboard with it...never knew that!  One of the things I hate about using a laptop is having to extend my arms so high to type but this would make having a laptop instead of a desktop computer acceptable to me.  Anna, Lisa, and Kim also made me understand that buying a more expensive laptop instead of a cheaper laptop plus a cheaper desktop is the way to go.  I hate the thought of the cost but it really is cost efficient.

I don't know what I'd do without a computer.  I'm on it for maybe 5-6 hours every day for e-mail, blogging, research, or casual interests.  I much prefer it to watching the boob tube, especially since there's so little on T.V. worth watching.  In earlier years, I did a lot of reading but that puts me to sleep now so I don't read as much as I should.  The internet provides instant answers to any questions that cross my mind, too, and that's fun to explore.

Right now my plan is to have Matt remove the old desktop computer, set up my old laptop in it's place, and then hope it suffices for a few months until I gain the nerve to purchase an expensive laptop.  The old one was giving me a little grief in Florida but it might have been mainly the icky internet service I have to use there.  I'm hoping the cable internet I use now will make a big difference and allow me wait just a while before taking the plunge and buying a new laptop.  We'll see.

I'm Not Voting

I can't help it.  When I listen to all those present or wannabe politicians spouting the same old promises they have no intention of keeping it disgusts me.  Why other people believe them enough to vote for them is completely beyond my understanding.  They always make promises to create more jobs, do wonders for retirees and teachers, and now they're promising more help for the people with mental disorders.  Always the topic of the day!  And they won't fulfill any of these promises...but their brain dead followers will still rally round them and cheer them on.  Insane.

Elections get me down for another reason.  Their campaign signs interfere with my recognition of yard sale signs because they look similar.  I rarely yard sale any more but my eyes have been trained to spot a yard sale sign a mile away so I still react to them viscerally.  When I realize it's only depicting a political candidate, I'm disappointed.

Political candidates make a lot of speeches and they usually have a little (or large) group of people standing behind them while they speak.  That always looks comical to me, wondering why they are standing there like zombies.  I think it's to make us think the candidate has a strong following and that's why we should believe them.  It's a visual that doesn't ring true.

I know we need people to run our country but why can't some of them actually do the job they were elected to do?  And why don't we, the public, have the right to demand they keep their campaign promises?  And I think we should pay more attention to and support the politician who seems to be ganged up on by the others.  The one being hooted and booed might be the only honest one in the bunch.     



   

Ordering Cheques

Today is really a do-nothing day, perfect for doing catch-up on odd jobs.  I pay my rent with post dated cheques because I'm a little reticent about giving access to my bank accounts to too many people.  I started writing out the darned cheques and ran out of them...who would have known?  The people who work at my new bank have turned out to be very pleasant to do business with so I called to order new cheques over the phone.  I found out that I can get 100 single cheques for free but it would cost me close to $50 to order the checkbooks with copies.  Guess which ones I ordered!

Banks are gearing down the use of cheques at all so they're not making it easy for those of us who still want to use them.  I can still get 100 free every year and I won't use those up but they're still nice to have handy.

I love having these do-nothing days where my time is completely my own.  If there's a cupboard that could be cleaned out or a few phone calls to be made, these are the days to do it...it's my choice.  Apartment living is much different from living in a house because houses are filled with odd jobs waiting to be done.  It tires me just thinking about what I've escaped.  When I was younger, I loved to putter in the garden on do-nothing days but skin cancer and age made that too much of a chore. Apartment living is my choice and my pleasure now.

And now for another coffee.