2 Computer Illiterates

My friend, Carole, got a new laptop computer and we tried to get it set up. I was quite proud of myself that I had no trouble plugging it in but then the problems began.

She'd bought a mouse which had a strange little thing on the end of the cord which wouldn't plug into anything on the computer. After puzzling over it a few minutes we discovered it could be removed from the cord and now the end looked right. We plugged it into the computer but the curser wouldn't move. Damn!

We decided to use the pad instead to get her on the internet. I couldn't find the "wireless" sign because there was nothing that looked like mine on the screen. We tried a few things and found the wireless sign. Now we couldn't figure out how to sign up for Tengo because all the windows looked different from what I'd seen before. In time we got her signed up for the internet. Wow!

Then we struggled trying to get her free AVG (virus protection). We thought she was signed up for that but we couldn't get it activated...then realized we had to be online to do it. Problem solved except now she has 2 AVG signs at the bottom of her screen. Apparently we signed her up twice.

Then she wanted to go on AOL to read her mail and we got the screen up but it's very small. We never did figure out how to enlarge it but she was able to read her mail anyway.

Throughout our ordeal I kept saying, "We need Bob", but then we'd manage to get something right and go on to the next problem. Poor Bob is our resident computer genius who does his best to help us illiterates. Carole and I got the computer up and running but I think we'll need Bob to enlarge her AOL screen and get the mouse working. It's a good thing he's retired and good natured.

2007

As the year 2007 draws to a close I think back on the year with a mixture of sadness and weariness. All in all, it wasn't a good year for me. The worst part was that one of my sons-in-law passed away and any other problems fade in comparison.

It's rarely a day that goes by that I don't think how he was with us this time last year...I also feel the same way about my husband, that he was with us this day 3 years ago. It's very easy to bring their living faces and habits to mind and wonder how that all could disappear.

I don't remember having these feelings when my grandparents passed away. They were old and it was their time. Life went on. But with my husband and son-in-law I can't help but feel their time came too soon.

Would any of us want to know that we wouldn't exist in this world this time next year? Would we live the year any differently? I think most of us would be kinder and nicer if we knew we were about to die but I sure don't want to know when my final day will arrive.

Well, 2007 is about to end and in a few days it will be time for me to make another New Year's resolution. I think what I'll do is spread a little more love. Sounds maudlin but I don't have a whole lot of time left to be nice so 2008 will be the year I practice a bit more forgiveness...even to the guy who wrecked my basement in 2007! Happy New Year, Dean, and may 2008 be a good year for you.

Staying Healthy

Last summer I found out my blood sugar was getting a little high so I decided it was time to start eating right. I can't diet but I can eliminate things from my diet so by making better choices I managed to lose close to 20 lbs. Since I'm quite overweight not many people even noticed but that's okay. I'm not doing this to be a super model.

Today 3 of us went to a lovely restaurant for lunch and my canker sore was still giving me trouble so all I could eat was soup. The soup was so darned good that I tolerated the pain of eating and finished the whole thing. The canker sore diet may make me lose a few pounds but it isn't worth it.

I've been doing all the home remedies I know of to no avail. Rinsing with salt water, rinsing with peroxide, and holding fingertips full of salt directly on the canker sore hasn't eradicated it yet. But there is light at the end of the tunnel because I detect a slight improvement over yesterday. Now I can eat frozen yogurt with very little pain.

Speaking of which...I think I'll go apply a bit of frozen yogurt to my canker.

Canker Sore Diet

I'm on an enforced diet due to a huge canker sore on the side of my tongue near the back of my mouth. It actually hurts too much to even eat a brothy soup. I get these darned things every so often and it takes about a week for them to go away.


It appeared yesterday but reached full bloom today. Not only can't I eat but it's hard to even talk. Now that's a double disability! I sound somewhat like a drunk slurring her words and I'm afraid someone will think all that yakking I do about wine means I have a problem.


Today I stayed home and worked. I put tons of stuff on Ebay and then erased the bar code on tons of aprons we had donated to our park by Disney World. My only fortification throughout my busy day was frozen yogurt. Not bad medicine, really.


I'm going out for lunch tomorrow so this silly canker sore had better heal over before noon tomorrow.

Back from Miami

My friend, Carole, and I spent a lovely Xmas holiday in Miami with my youngest daughter's family and her in-laws. My daughter's in-laws are Cuban and the most warm and loving hosts anyone could want. In fact, I invited myself down there knowing I'd be greeted with open arms.

We arrived at the in-law's house around noon on Xmas Eve and found only Carmen and Juan there with their 17 month old granddaughter. That was the quietest moment we spent there. Before long the rest of the relatives began to arrive. The house was overflowing with gifts, food, and family. The Cuban's celebrate Xmas Eve just as we do Xmas day. Tables were decorated, unbelievable amounts of food was put out, and a very tiny amount of wine was consumed.

Late in the evening we all watched a 2 hour DVD of a high school musical my granddaughter had starred in. She was wonderful. I crawled into bed around 1:30 A.M. very happy to have been included in this terrific family's Xmas celebration.

There's only one thing wrong with my daughter's in-laws...it takes forever for a group of them to make up their minds and schedules to go on to the next function. I knew this and have learned to live with it but Carole seemed a bit dazed at times, occasionally asking politely, "Is the plan still in effect?". I'd smile sweetly and shake my head no. Plans would change by the minute and hours later we'd be racing around enveloped in a brand new plan of events. It's the Cuban way.

We left for home on Wednesday with a quick stopover at Shelley's sister-in-law's home in Ft. Lauderdale to see if my daughter and son-in-law needed my car trunk space for stuff they were taking up to their new home in Washington. Did I say quick? We got there at 7:30 A.M. and, in awe, watched plans change a few times until 10:30 A.M. when John finally got his UHaul trailer and therefore didn't need my trunk. Carole and I gave many kisses all around and finally got on the road to head back to our trailer park.

I loved every moment I spent with Shelley and her in-laws. I feel as much a part of their family as she must feel because they gather you in and surround you with love. They gave me a Xmas to remember with fond memories.

Just a note...we drove up the Florida Turnpike and had to stop to pay tolls. At one stop there were a few cars in front of us which paid the toll and drove off. I drove up to the toll booth and found the woman working in there asleep. How could she have fallen asleep in the few seconds it took for the car in front of me to leave and me to pull up? She sat there with eyes closed for about half a minute while I hollered "hello?" at her a few times. She finally opened her eyes and took my money and lifted the barrier to let me through. Strange or what??

Fragile Life

Here in our little trailer park we've received the bad news that one of our own has an inoperable form of lung cancer and will start treatment tomorrow. It batters us to be reminded that life is so fragile and can be endangered or ended at a moment's notice. It's always worse when the patient is young with the whole world ahead of them but the loss of someone 100 years old can be hurtful.

The fear is always that of the unkown. We really can't know what happens to us after our earthly body is lost but we can only hope that what comes after is much better than what is now. I don't know anyone who has lived a charmed life with no misery, no unhappiness, and no tragedy. Life as we know it is damned hard.

If anyone has taken the time to read my silly little story they'll know that I believe firmly in a wonderful life after death. I desperately want some answers about why life on earth is so painful. I need to believe that we reach something better, something more sensible than what we have now. I want to know that the "peace" we seek is not simply a never ending sleep.

Six of us went out for dinner tonight and had a wonderful time laughing and remembering our younger lives. I know that not all seniors enjoy their elder years like this. They don't have the companionship or laughter that seems to fill my days here in Florida and it makes me so damned grateful for every moment. In the back of my mind, every day, is the reminder that this too shall end one day.

No matter how we end our days, I want to go out with good memories of the love of family and friends. And then I want to start a great new adventure in the hereafter. For my friend who is harshly dealing with her mortality, I hope for a miracle. Her adventure in the hereafter can wait a while.

Trailer Park Xmas Light Tour

Our trailer park is lovely in normal times but during the Xmas season some people go all out to decorate and light their Florida homes. Most winters a group of us will take a walk around the park late in the evening to admire our neighbor's efforts.

Last night after Bingo a group of us met at my trailer to fortify ourselves with a glass of wine for the trip. We bundled into 3 golf carts and started the tour. We sang Xmas songs to rave reviews all the way. Well, maybe some of the people yelling at us might have been telling us to shut up but that's beside the point.

The main thing is that we had fun, enjoyed the lights, and had a good time with good friends. I can't imagine having such a great social life living under any different circumstances. We're retired, living in close proximity, see each other most of every day, and have learned how to play nice. It's a good life.

To those who missed our musical tour..."We Wish You a Merry Christmas!".

Guns in America

One of the things I fear most when I'm in the U.S. is the number of guns out in the general populace. Common sense tells me that the more people who have access to a gun the more crimes will be committed.

While I'm in the States I keep in mind that I'm a visitor to this country and have no right to express my strong feelings about guns. It just isn't fitting to visit someone's home and find fault with their way of life so I keep my opinions to myself.

What I have discovered is that most of the Americans I encounter who bring up the subject of guns feel much the same way I do. They are sick of the crime all around them and fear guns as much as we Canadians do. We aren't so different after all.

What surprised me the other day was listening to a Canadian man raving about how everyone should have a gun to protect themselves. A Canadian talking like this? Amazing. Him I could have argued with and not felt like I was disrespecting my host but I quickly lost interest. The man is in his late 70's so nothing I could say would change his way of thinking. There will always be pros and cons on the subject and my hope is that one day there will be gun control in the U.S. as stringent as it is in Canada. You can't take all the guns off the streets but you can limit their availablility.

Even with the strong gun control laws in Canada there doesn't seem to be a weekend that goes by that we don't hear of someone shot and killed in Toronto. It often seems to happen at a night club where booze or drugs fuel the insanity.

It's highly dangerous to allow some people to own guns. If they are angry, depressed, cruel, or stupid and own a gun they are a menace to society. Unfortunately, most of us can mask those personality flaws and easily purchase a gun in the U.S. Canada's laws simply make it more difficult.

I hope the U.S. stand up to the gun lobbyists and take a stand on this matter. The police officers who put their lives on the line deserve better odds at making it back home after their shift.

My Ferne

I was very lucky to marry into my husband's family because they taught me how families were supposed to be. It instantly became apparent that my husband's family was large and wildly entwined. I was fascinated at the way they all seemed to like each other and were involved in each other's lives. My family wasn't like that. My mother-in-law, Ferne, lived in New Brunswick so I didn't meet her until a couple of years after Dennis and I were married and had our first child.

Ferne was a dream mother-in-law because she was loving and non-judgemental from the very beginning. She was fun to be with because she enjoyed life. In fact, she relished it. She seemed to dive right in to anything that was going on at the moment and gathering in all the fun she could.

I mentioned before how I fell in love with her the time we sat on either side of a closed bathroom door and cried over my inconsiderate husband/her inconsiderate son. She didn't blame him personally but placed blame instead on the whole male sex.

When Ferne was in her 80's she began to exhibit symptoms of dementia which slowly accelerated until she was put in a nursing home. It broke my heart to see that once vibrant, intelligent woman reduced to stillness.

Before she passed away she withered into a tiny little person without the strength to change her position in bed. Her memory had long since failed her and she knew none of us. We, her family, sat vigil over her during her last days and it was the day before she died that one of her daughters and I witnessed a minor miracle.

Ferne was lying, as usual, on her side but suddenly rolled onto her back (something she'd been unable to do) and reached her arms straight up in the air as she gazed intently at something or someone we couldn't see.
Jacky and I watched in amazement as Ferne fell back and then quickly repeated her actions. What did she see? What did she remember?

I'm not sure if it was the same day but another miracle happened. Ferne's daughter, Marilee, was sitting by her mother's bed crying over her impending loss when, suddenly, Ferne reached up to brush the tears from her daughter's face and asked, "Marilee, why are you crying?". It had been quite a while since Ferne recognized anyone.

Deep inside this wonderful lady still dwelt the memories of her life, maybe overlaid with the dreaded dementia but there nonetheless.

Ferne passed away quietly and went on to her much deserved reward. She left behind a large family and many friends who loved her. She's been gone for 5 years now and I'll always miss her.

I have 2 sons-in-law who I hope will always have kind words to say about me but not all of us can measure up to my Ferne. She was very special and I was a lucky woman to have her for a mother-in-law.

Casino or Internet Cafe?

Just some information on what I thought was a casino in mid Florida.

Casino's are legal here only on Indian land. The casino cruise we take out of Cape Canaveral only allows gambling once we're out in international waters. The so-called casino in mid Florida is not a casino at all but an internet business that has discovered a way to skirt the casino laws here.

The building is in a strip mall with computers lining each side of the store. You are given an ID card which you can take to a machine where you load it with credits ($20 gives you 2000 penny credits). You then go to one of the computers and slide your card in. This buys you minutes on the internet or credits on casino type games. Once your money is transferred to the computer you can't get it back. What you can cash in are credits you win.

It's an interesting way of getting around the laws and I'm wondering how long before it's closed down. There aren't many games to choose from but they look much like slot machine games.

We spent a few hours there and I was the big loser. Surprise, surprise! The good news is that it wasn't a lot of money. This is a place I'd go back to but not often. I love the bells and whistles at a real casino and this place was just too tame.

Cold in Florida

I've been talking to or e-mailing my family back in Canada and they aren't even a tiny bit impressed with the cold spell we're having in Florida. Truthfully, it's the cold spells we have that give me a chance to get some work done inside the trailer. When it's sunny and warm/hot, I want to be outside and preferably at the pool.

Yesterday I had my Monday morning coffee group over and we stayed indoors because of the cold. When they all left I began making my livingroom curtains and that kept me busy all afternoon. They are lilac and make my trailer look very feminine which is suiting since the person living here is of the female persuasion. I figure that when I sell the trailer the new owner can change the curtains to suit themselves.

I took time off to play Pokeno in the evening and it was fun as usual. It's a silly, mindless game but it's the socializing that draws us in. The most you can lose is $1.50 so the stakes aren't high. We use pennies but every drop in the pot is 5 cents. I asked once why we don't use nickles and was told that it was traditional to use pennies. That's okay because I like traditions.

Today the weather will be somewhat warmer but I'm being taken to a casino just up the road. I had no idea it was even there but apparently they have penny and nickle machines so I need to know where it is for future reference.

My curtains will be finished in the next few days and then it will be warm enough to go to the pool. Pretty nice for December!

Missing Them

Sometimes I get my ideas for a blog from other blogs I read. This is one of them.

Every Christmas I look back in time and think about other years, such as in my childhood when my grandmother would toil all month to prepare Christmas for us. I never fully appreciated how she was able to find the money in her meagre funds to beautifully decorate our little apartment, buy presents for everyone (even friends), and cook a fabulous dinner on a wood stove for her family and friends. There was one old man who always came to dinner and hardly said two words but he had no-where else to go...no family, no other friends.

I remember so many Christmas seasons when my children were small. It was all about them so presents for my husband and me were small and inconsequential. The children would burst into Xmas morning with all the joy and enthusiasm of the very young. I don't think it was greed that fired them but just happiness from all the hype of the season.

Every Christmas season is also filled with sadness for those of our loved ones who have passed away and won't be here with us this year. My husband passed away 2 1/2 years ago and I was always told we have to experience a full year of special days like birthdays and holidays before we can really accept that they're gone but Xmas is unique. It still seems strange to me to be admiring the beautiful Xmas decorations and socializing with friends when he's somewhere else out there in the universe. Maybe I'll always carry the guilt of the survivor.

The people from my childhood Chrstmas's are mainly gone on to their reward but one is still with me, in my heart anyway. My sister, Sharon, will be spending Christmas this year with two of my daughters back in Canada. Kim (who is recently widowed) and her children, Cindy (who is recently separated) and her children, Sharon and her husband, Jim, will all be together for Christmas day 2007. I am so absolutely thrilled to think of them all spending Xmas together that it makes me cry.

My Christmas this year isn't too shabby, either, because it will be spent in Miami with my daughter, Shelley, and her family. They're back from Argentina and staying in Miami through Xmas before heading up to Washington D.C. and then on to Bolivia in the spring. This is a wonderful opportunity to spend Christmas with them. Not to mention the fact that I'm crazy about her in-laws and the Cuban/salsa Xmas they practice.

In the end, Christmas is about being with family and friends and celebrating our lives together. We won't completely forget our losses over the years but being with the people we love will help us be thankful for what we had and still have.

Family and friends. That's what it's all about.

Thin Blooded Floridians

It's going to get down into the mid 30'sF tonight and all the local television channels are running banners of warnings. We're told to keep all exposed skin covered and to stay inside if we have breathing difficulties. Tomorrow it will only reach the high 50's and you can bet your life these southerners will be outside wearing parkas and toques.

True northerners scoff at this but the truth is that we snowbirds are altering our own tolerance of the cold by spending our winters here. When I get back to Ontario in April there will probably still be snow on the ground. The normal chill of an April day will bite into me and make me zip up my jacket...in years past I'd leave my jacket flying open in the face of a full blown snow storm but not any more.

So, carry on you brave and hardy northern souls. You will be the ones who inherit the earth...unless global warming is not a myth. In that case, it will be the southerners who never seem to wilt in 90 degree weather who will be the winners after all.

As for me, tonight I'll put the furnace on and probably leave it on all day tomorrow. But I draw the line at a parka and toque.

Kimmie

This is my daughter Kim's first Xmas without her beloved hubby. David passed away from kidney cancer on August 4th so this is a particularly painful season for her. Nothing can be said to take away her pain but her Aunt Joyce sent her a lovely card with just the perfect message on it to help her through her loss. If you follow the link to "Kim" I'm sure you'll agree that no better words could be spoken to someone who has lost a loved one.

For anyone who has lost a loved one this past year, I hope you can enjoy the Xmas season by remembering the good times. Good memories can be a powerful antidote for sadness and grief. Remember the smiles, remember the laughter, remember the love. And be thankful you experienced it.

Tengo World

I chose to use Tengo wireless internet service this year in Florida and have been sorry ever since. This morning gave me one more reason to dislike it.

I awoke at 4:30 A.M. to severe thunderstorms and decided it best to stay up and watch the weather report on T.V. There is always the danger of tornadoes in the winter and we trailer dwellers are at the highest risk for damage or worse. Sure enough, there were tornado warnings and watches in effect but all just north of us.

As the storm passed us by I turned on the computer and, once again, was unable to get on the internet. My experience with wireless Tengo has been abysmal. Better than half the time I can't gain access to the internet and even loading pages is often slow or impossible. I figured it was time to phone Tengo for help.

The help I received was rude, impatient, and condescending. I can only hope that "Clifton" isn't a true representative of Tengo employees because he was unbearable. I wanted to reach through the phone and smack him upside the head.

"Clifton" led me through a few procedures but was unable to solve the problem so he's passing me on to a higher form of help. They'll phone me within 24 hours so I hope they've taken some classes in tact and plain old courtesy.

After "Clifton" and I parted company, I had nothing to lose so I tried once more to get on the internet and succeeded. Oh, the mysteries in my life! I was able to write my blog but then lost the internet connection once more. Now I'm back on and wondering how long it will last.

Only time will tell. In any case, next year I'm going to swallow my pride and go back to AOL and use the telephone line for my internet service. It can't possibly be worse than Tengo.

Passwords

Who ever would have thought that the day would come when we couldn't function properly without inserting passwords into machines? As a rule, the older we get the less reliable our memories are but now we have to tax our memories to the limit just to get by every day.

First thing in the morning back home I have to poke in a combination of numbers on my security system just so I can open the windows and doors without setting off a siren. Then I start up the computer which also requires a password to get into my inner sanctum. To enter Blogspot requires another set of passwords. All of this before my eyes are fully opened.

When I leave the house I have to again poke in the numbers to set the alarm system so my little house will be better protected from burglers. If I need money from the ATM there is another set of numbers I need to remember in order to get at it.

The other day I needed to ask Visa a question and they wanted to know my mother's maiden name before they'd talk to me. The telephone company wanted to know the name of my dog. You can see that my passwords are geared to my limited memory bank.

If I ever lose my memory completely I won't be able to get in my house and I won't be able to get money out of the ATM to go to a motel.

Wondering Why

The mother of a teenage boy who took a rifle into a mall and opened fire was interviewed on T.V. this morning.

They showed pictures of an obviously troubled and sad young man...pictures that hurt just to look at them. His mother was strange. You know how some people just seem a little "off", well she was that way. I couldn't help but wonder what that young man's home life was like.

All children are at the mercy of the adults who care for them. It warms your heart when you see an innocent child being lovingly cared for by their parents or other family members. A child is nurtured by the people who raise them, or destoyed by unworthy care takers.

I look back on all the mistakes I made as a parent and am amazed at how well my children made it through those early years. Granted, there are long lasting effects hidden inside them but, on the whole, they've done extremely well.

We are all a result of our childhood experiences. Some of us are strong enough to overcome terrible odds but some fall by the wayside. The young man who expressed his anger with the world by opening fire in a mall was one of the lost ones.

We Don't Care

My sister-in law, Joyce, e-mailed today to say that they have 2 feet of snow and have to shovel off the roof. For all the northerners who take the time to moan and groan to us snowbirds about how much snow you got...we don't care! We love to hear about the bad weather up north because it makes us gloat. We also know that one day in the future we'll have to spend our winters right up there with you but not today. Today we're in the sunny south and it's pool weather!!

Old Dogs Learning New Tricks

When my husband was alive we each had our own chores at home and with the trailer here in Florida. One of his chores was to take the Florida room windows apart for cleaning. The screens are a permanent fixture so the windows can't be cleaned from the outside...poor design. I haven't cleaned these windows since he passed away because I was afraid I'd get them apart and then not be able to put them together again. He cleaned them last in 2003 so they looked pretty bad.

My friend, Carole, who bought the trailer across the road has no such fears. This is her first year in her trailer and the windows are cleaned already. So yesterday I decided to bite the bullet and clean mine.

Each section is a set of 4 windows that lock into each other. I labeled each one...1.2.3.4...so they'd go back in the right order. I removed them and cleaned number 4 which went to the top. It wouldn't go back in and actually looked too small for the window. I called Carole over and we struggled to put the damn thing in. We discovered 2 little bars on each side of the window frame and realized we needed to work with them and, voila, in went my one clean window. The rest were easy now that I knew the secret.

I'm always so afraid of failing at new things it makes me fearful to try but with every success it gives me a feeling of accomplishment. Having a friend like Carole who will take on anything makes me want to follow suit. She gives me confidence in myself or maybe it's more like...damn it, if she can do it so can I! Whatever, this is a positive thing.

In any case, this has been a big deal in my life. It's something that's irritated me for a couple of years and now I've finally taken care of the problem. One more tiny success to add to the pile!

A Xmas Memory

We've been talking about Christmas's in our childhood and there is one in particular that stays with me. I was 3 years old and had received a prize doll from Santa and, like all children with their dolls, I settled down to undress it. My grandmother, with whom I lived, was adamant that I should keep my new doll as pristine as when it arrived under the tree. I think she was one of those people who don't understand that toys are to be played with and not just admired.

When my grandmother went into the kitchen to prepare our dinner (she was one wonderful cook) I removed the doll's clothes and then redressed her. Soon it was dinnertime so I reluctantly left my new doll in the livingroom while we ate our Christmas dinner.

When I finished dinner I couldn't find my doll. I was in a panic and looked everywhere for her until my grandmother said, "Santa took her back because you undressed her after being told not to". I was heartbroken. I remember looking around to see if Santa might still be nearby and maybe give me back the doll...but it didn't happen.

I never saw that doll again. My grandmother had taken the doll to teach me a lesson. When I was old enough to understand what had actually happened to the doll I did learn my lesson. It was resentment and distrust of my grandmother.

She thought she was doing the right thing but she'd missed the true message of Christmas. It's mainly for the children, bringing them joy and happiness to the best of your ability.

I never did ask her about that darned doll but I still wonder what she did with it!

Pink Cowboy Hats at Downtown Disney

Fifteen of us seniors piled into 3 vans and headed for Downtown Disney today around 4:30 P.M. I've often mentioned how much I love going there in the evening, especially a warm evening such as tonight's.

We sauntered through the streets, stopping for our free chocolate at Giardelli's (never sure I'm spelling that right) and then going on to the Earl of Sandwich where we sat out on the patio eating the terrific hot sandwiches they make there. As we were leaving, Millie and Ron went over to a table of complete strangers and began to sing to them. The people looked a little confused at first but soon appreciated the singers.

From there it was on to the free boat ride to the French Quarter where we all sang Xmas songs and even "Old McDonald Had a Farm" to a young couple lucky enough to share the boat ride with us. They looked a little confused at first but soon began to appreciate us and even said we had made their day.

At the French Quarter we went into the restaurant and had a snack before touring through the gift shop. Ron entertained the clerks by trying to buy something with toy coins but they were too smart for him.

The boat ride back to Downtown Disney was completely full and that made us a little shy to show our talents so we kept our mouths shut for that trip.

We looked through a few shops and lost one vanful of our friends. No problem. All 6 ladies left in our group found a wonderful bargain in one of the stores...beautiful pink cowboy hats!! We wore them out and stopped once more for another piece of free chocolate and then entertained the tourists with one last Xmas song. The people loved us! I think the pink cowboy hats made us look a bit more professional.

As we ladies waited for the men to get their vans, Jeannie told us a story about how she'd burned something very tender while leaning over the stove. Just then a security guard came over to see why 6 ladies in pink cowboy hats were falling over themselves with laughter. Jeannie told him she needed a bandaid for her booboo and he began to search for one but, somewhere between the giggles and double entendres, he began to understand that we were putting him on. He joined in the fun and asked her if a stick of gum would help and she suggested it might help if he chewed it for her first. We'll always wonder where the conversation would have led if our men hadn't shown up with the vans.

Anyway, we arrived back at the park around 10 P.M. happy, full of chocolate and good memories. We ladies plan to wear our pink cowboy hats at every opportunity.

Meltdown Over

Last night I went to a party at a friend's house and had such a great time. Many of the people I care about most here in the park were there and we did a lot of yakking and a lot of laughing. Did I mention that we also did a fair amount of drinking?

This morning was breakfast at a local restaurant with a few friends and then off to the flea market with my friend, Carole. We stopped at Walmart on the way home and I bought some of the $1 a yard fabric to make new curtains for the trailer windows. I'm not sure about the color (lilac) but it's worth a try. If the color bothers me it's easily changed at that price.

Mickey was working on my wall when we got back and the panelling is all up. He still has to do the trim but then I can get this place back to normal. That's all I want...normal!

A gang of us are going to Downtown Disney tonight and that will be fun. Millie and Ron will probably lead the whole place in singing Xmas carols like they did a few years ago. They are true characters!

Just a little note for the northerners who are still home and dealing with the cold winter...I had to put the air conditioning on because it was just too hot in here today. LOL!

Meltdown

I had a bit of a meltdown yesterday just from the trmendous stress I've been dealing with since the spring. Having suffered from depression for many years and then gained a measure of control over my life I recognized yesterday that I'd reached the end of my coping ability.

I took an anti-inflamatory for my knee and went to bed early last night. It's amazing how we can gain our equilibrium back after a good night's sleep so I can see things in better perspective this morning.

It's understandable why everything came to a head yesterday. In the spring I had coped with a renovator who walked out and left me with a torn apart basement. I coped with the added expense of a new renovator. In the summer I coped with the news that I had a 2 spots of skin cancer that were eradicated, thank heavens. I coped with the news that I had a blood disorder. I coped with the death of my son-in-law. And then this fall I coped with my daughter's car accident and injury. Then my knee injury flared up. And, oh yes, I also coped with the water damage to my new floor in the basement and the ensuing $3500 repair to the foundation wall which had allowed the water in.

When I finally made it down to my little haven in Florida only to find the front wall of my trailer rotting out, I thought I was coping with the mess of having it repaired. I think that is when my coping skills let me down.

We can only handle so much stress in our lives and then we have to back off to allow ourselves time to heal. Yesterday was my day. I couldn't withdraw physically because Mickey, the man who is doing all the work here, needed me to be close by. So I withdrew mentally, distancing myself from the present as best I could. It seems to have worked because this morning I feel as though I can handle whatever the day offers.

The outside of the trailer is finished and the inside is maybe a day or day and a half away from being finished. I can handle this. In fact, I'm not doing too bad a job of holding myself together in the face of all that's hit the fan since the spring.

The secret is to close down and give our overloaded brain a rest. And to remember that tomorrow is a new day.

The City I Fell in Love With

During our middle and later years my husband and I were lucky enough to visit some very interesting cities and even countries. We spent time in Cuba, China, and Venezuela and enjoyed very much the different cultures and ways of life.

As much as I loved travelling to those places, there is one place in Canada that I visited maybe 15 years ago that made me cry to leave it. It's a rather small city in British Columbia called Vernon.

My husband and I went out there on a business trip and flew into Kamloops. We drove north to Vernon and my memory of our arrival is one of awe. I remember a large lake on one side and mountains on the perimeter. It was so beautiful that it took my breath away. I don't remember the inner city as being spectacular but the entry into the city was so lovely I still yearn to relive it.

When we left a few days later I cried because I knew I'd probably never get the chance to go back there. It's been a prized memory ever since. From that day forward I always had a secret desire to run away from home one day and return there.

But 15 years have passed so I'm sure it isn't quite the same and I'd be disappointed...but maybe I wouldn't. And maybe I just might find a way to go back for another look.

Disney Sale

Four of us ladies drove off in a small car this morning at 6 A.M. Our destination was the huge Disney sale that only Disney employees and their friends can take advantage of. We were all thrilled to death...well, the Disney employee who is a wonderful friend and the person responsible for us going wasn't exactly thrilled, but she was doing it for us!!

We got our carts and stood in line for about half an hour before the doors opened. We saw the beautiful sunrise, too. Once inside we all spread out to find some bargains and, before you knew it, my cart was full. It was quite a good sale and we all bought much more than we thought we would.

We paid for our merchandise and then pushed our overflowing carts out to the....small, compact car. How could we not have thought far enough ahead to realize we needed room for our purchases? As we neared the car, it looked smaller and smaller. Carole, the owner, is a good packer and we did manage to get all our stuff in the trunk. I had visions of us sitting in the car with packages blinding our view of the road but that didn't happen.

Off we went to IHOP for breakfast and spent a nice couple of hours eating and yakking. We were home by 10:30 A.M. Don't let anyone tell you that the senior life is a lazy one.

Aging Gracefully

I listened to a bunch of men on T.V. today moaning about the worries of being 50 or older and living long enough to see their toddlers grown and married. Hello??? Maybe they should have thought about that before marrying a woman in her 20's. My sympathies lie with the young wife who has to put up with an aging husband's ego.

Let me tell you what being on the far side of 50 or 60 feels like. Your body does change but I know many senior couples who have a vibrant, active sex life. They love each other as human beings and are able to see past the physical imperfections. They enjoy each other.

Age also brings stiff joints and loss of strength but we learn to laugh about this. It's a big joke among us that it takes us 3 times as long just to crawl out of the car. We don't like the limitations that age imposes on us but we become philosophical about it. It could always be worse.

Wrinkles are inevitable. Our skin loses elasticity as we age and the result is wrinkles. Some choose plastic surgery but end up looking like manikins. I think that aging gracefully means accepting your looks as you grow older and not trying to be something you're not.

But not everyone ages at the same speed as others. Many seniors are joggers or continue to work at physically demanding jobs well into their 80's. Some are born with good genes which keep them looking youthful long into old age. I don't happen to be one of them but that's okay. We are what we are!

Like my husband used to say..."If I'd known I was going to live this long, I would have taken better care of myself".

Trailer Damage

My friend's husband has taken on the job of fixing the front wall of my trailer that has been experiencing progressive water damage over the years. He removed the inside wallboards and we found that most of the framing is wet and rotten and needs to be replaced.

The one good thing that's come out of this mess is that we now know where the water is coming in and we couldn't have known that for sure without going inside the walls. Surprisingly, it isn't a terrific expense to repair this damage so I'm very happy that I was forced to go through with it.

Mickey, Sylvia's husband, is a work demon. He reminds me of my husband's work ethic with one exception. Mickey cleans up after himself as he goes and Dennis was content to work in a mess. Both are Maritimers and I know they would have gotten along great if Dennis were still alive.

Today, Mickey will be back hard at work on my front wall and another neighbor will be hard at work putting in a flush toilet for my friend, Carole. Good examples of the wonderful help we're able to get in this park whenever it's needed.

Policing the Garbage

My hometown is debating passing a law which would require citizens to put their garbage out in clear plastic bags. This is so recyclable garbage can easily be seen where as now it can be hidden inside the black plastic bags.

Many years ago, before the black plastic garbage bag was invented, we put our household trash out in large tin trash cans. That must have been terribly messy for the garbage collectors so the advent of plastic bags must have seemed like a godsend to them.

Now it seems as though they want to pick up as little trash as possible...to the point where we might not even need them anymore. Once you do all the recycling and throw your veggie peelings into the composter, what's left?

Recycling makes a lot of sense. We are a terribly wasteful society who are polluting our planet at a frightening rate so we've got to take stock of ourselves and do better.

One place to start is at the grocery store. We buy a bag of cereal in a huge box that is only half filled with cereal. They do this to make us believe we're getting more for our money. It's a waste of paper product (and plastic) and just adds to the landfill in the end. Most of the products we buy come in oversized boxes. Silly, isn't it?

Anyone thinking that we can solve the problem of too much plastic in our landfill is wrong, though. Almost everything we own has an element of plastic in it and it will all end up at the dump some time in the future.

We're burying ourselves in plastic and it ain't all garbage bags, honey!

Laughter is the Best Medicine

My so-called friends here at the park have been laughing themselves silly about me putting my knee brace on the wrong leg. I told them tonight they'd really have to worry if they saw me wearing it on my elbow but they said they'd just take me to the home. Nice friends!

Feathering Our Nests

This trailer park is a beehive of activity. New floors are being laid, new curtains hung, new appliances hooked up. To be honest, we tend to buy on the cheap and use park labor or friends with time on their hands to do the jobs but we never seem to stop improving our little homes away from home.

I'm only guessing but I believe some of these trailers would rot into the ground if it wasn't for the nesting instincts of the ladies of the house. We like our homes to look nice even if they only measure 34' long x 8' wide like mine does. I also have a Florida room that measures 22' long x 10' wide and I'm running some things around in my mind about how to do some redecorating out there without spending much money.

My friend, who arrived 6 days ago, is in the process of having laminate flooring laid in her Florida room and it looks so nice it's giving me some thoughts about doing the same for mine but I have to get the leak in my front wall fixed first. The golden rule with owning a trailer in a park where you don't own the land is to never put too much money into it. Trailer parks have been disappearing at a rapid rate for the last few years to make way for housing developments but right now there is a glut of those houses so maybe we're safe for a while.

This morning the sun is trying to shine through the haze and the temperatures should reach into the high 70's. Retirement has certainly brought me to a wonderful place on this earth to spend my winters. And I'm forever thankful for every day I'm allowed.